Is it rude to wear a top like this to a consultation with pain specialist

[duckduckmouse]

www.thefmlystore.com/collections/women/products/the-wonder-women-raglan-scoop-sweatshirt

I'm really fed up of the service I'm getting and my condition. I'm really desperate to have another child and my medication which I detest isn't compatible with pregnancy.

I want the pain specialist to make a permanent solution or a semi permanent solution by a physical intervention such as denervation or a nerve block because I cannot continue to have a life based on pain and medication.

I take maximum dose of gabapentin and del truly abandoned by the team.

I want to send a strong message which is that I want to have no medication in my life so that I can have another child.

What do you think?

If trigger point injections helped you then have you tried acupuncture?

I'm trying to think how to say this without sounding horrible...I have a chronic pain condition so I really do get it.

But...you sound a bit...nutty!

Your notes should be more coherent because they're quite rambling.

You shouldn't mention anything about them "trying to keep you quiet" or allude to it.

And I actually don't understand what you're even attempting with the shirt. You want him to read that and go "oh good god, this woman needs surgery, stat!"

It's all just a bit bizarre!

@OttilieKnackered you are nuts.

I'm asking about myself and made a comment about mothers, go join a crueler thread where your stupid comments go un noticed. for me you are stressing me out.

To the others who haven't read the thread I have a plan for my conversation and my husband and a private nurse are coming.

I was wondering if people thought it would be rude to wear that jumper. I'm always well kept so that's not why I would wear it it's just to be a cheeky patient who wants to communicate that I love being a mother and it's very important to me

Is this the extent of your notes?

"I'm at the end of my tether. Really so fed up.

They are all trying to keep me quiet with gabapentin, amatryptaline and codeine or Tramadol which I cannot take any more as it makes me feel so poorly and miserable."

You've told us more more than that here, but you really need to be saying all of that to your Dr. You need to be 100% open and honest and frank with your Dr. Add ALL OF THIS to your notes, along with literally every single other thing that's on your mind regarding or related to this issue:

I'm really fed up of the service I'm getting and my condition. I'm really desperate to have another child and my medication which I detest isn't compatible with pregnancy.

I want the pain specialist to make a permanent solution or a semi permanent solution by a physical intervention such as denervation or a nerve block because I cannot continue to have a life based on pain and medication.

I take maximum dose of gabapentin and del [feel?] truly abandoned by the team.

I've had trigger point injections and steroids, they worked for a time. I was delighted.

Want a permanent solution, pain nurse says they want to do a temporary procedure first to check if the nerve block is going to be effective.

To be honest I couldn't care less what the procedure is provided the risks are low and I can have a child.

I want to have no medication in my life so that I can have another child.

Tell them every word of what you've told us here, as well as every word you've kept back. Be perfectly frank, look the Dr in the eye, and SAY IT, as clearly and explicitly as you can manage.

And if you like that top, get the top and wear it! It's cute. Everyone wears tops with words on them these days, so nobody will pay much attention, but if you like it and want to broadcast its message, then wear it with your head held high!

Just don't hope that a top will do your communicating for you. ONLY YOU can do that, and do it you absolutely MUST.

They are all trying to keep me quiet with gabapentin, amatryptaline and codeine or Tramadol which I cannot take any more as it makes me feel so poorly and miserable.

Your condition, whatever it is must be horrible for you to deal with but they are not trying to keep you quiet, they are trying to help you. They want you to be well and not in pain almost as much as you do. These are all pretty heavy drugs, not given to keep people quiet, but to try to make people's lives as pain free as possible.

The t-shirt would totally pass them by!

I know you are in pain but have you had an appointment since the trigger point injections in July in order for them to even offer your a permanent solution ? 3 months is a standard time between appointments ( round here it's is more usually 6 as there are not enough clinic appointments ) and you may find they plan to offer that to you anyway so don't go in all guns blazing till you hear what they have to say.

OP, that too wouldn't be 'a cheeky statement'. It isn't remotely saying what you're trying to get across. Maybe listen to pp's advice and focus on actually communicating with your HCP team. But if it turns out that they do have a valid reason for no surgery, then you have to accept they know best. No one is trying to dope you into compliance, they're trying to manage your pain.

I'm nuts? You're the person conflating which medication you're given with mothers being strong. I have every sympathy with the pain you're in and your frustration with not getting the right treatment. I just think linking it to motherhood is ag best illogical and at worst highly offensive.

@JWrecks I attached two photos of my notes, I'm not going in blind and will be explaining that the need for a solution is based on the fact I want to expand my family.

Am bringing a private nurse and husband too
Thank you for the pointers, I'll take them onboard and add some of them to my notes I already have.

That's true mamma

Many a man or woman would love some of what you are on I am sad to say !

You can do this OP but try to not think of them as your enemy as they really aren't

@OttilieKnackered if I didn't want to have another baby I would continue with the medication but as I want to expand my family I cannot continue with it.

It's not that taking medicine makes you an inadequate mom. I've taken them since February and believe me I am a great mother.

OP we can't see the pictures of your handwritten notes.

To be more precise, the implication of your mother comments is that non mothers should have different/lesser treatment by virtue of not having children.

Your notes aren't clear. Stop trying to make grand statements as if you're writing a speech for a party political conference and refer to the who/what/when/where and how of the matter at hand.

Who? You. Not Wonder Woman, not mothers, you the patient.

What/when/where? Speak about the severity of your symptoms and the negative impact that the medication is having on your life. How long you've been experiencing these symptoms, what relief you've had from pain management so far etc.

Ask questions about what possible routes of treatment there are for you.

So they are considering a surgical procedure but want to do a temporary version first to ensure that it works. That sounds sensible. I can see that it doesn't match the timescale that you would like but they don't sound unreasonable.

I hope the appointment goes OK for you OP.

It also may be that they can't give you what you want and you won't be able to expand your family. OP, please prepare yourself for that being a possibility. It isn't people being cruel and uncaring, it's that you have physical limitations that you may not be able to get around.

A nerve block isn't a perminent solution

@Didiplanthis yes I think they will be offering more treatments, I just want to get off the medication.

I've already quit Fentanyl, which was grim.

I'm not an all guns blazing kind of girl. I actually melt when I'm in a consultants office.

Next appointment was scheduled for January 2018 until I made a complaint.

Access the NICE guidance for proven treatments for your condition, read through it and you might find that your Consultant is following appropriate steps, you may be on the threshold of a new step. Regardless of this, you (not your consultant) will need to decide what your main priority is.
Anyway, your top is not rude, it's irrelevant. HTH.

You need to tell the doctor/consultant/specialist exactly what you want, using words that you speak or write. They will not pay any attention to your top. You could read your top aloud and gesticulate towards it with sparklers in your hands and they won't get it at all.
If it's hard to get out what you want to say in a consultation you really could write it down first (type it perhaps so it's clear) and print it out and take it with you and hand it over or read it out. It's fine to do that.

They are there, I've just checked.

Has this worked now?

OP my DH had been suffering for nearly three years. He's been on the exact same meds, plus more (morphine variations,even anti depressants offered though not depressed).
He's also been misdiagnosed and treated for the wrong illness. They've sent him for scans to assess organs they've previously removed . They've changed their minds about what damage they have found where.
At this point we both think that he's probably no longer ill with what he had initially, but that so many meds have just damaged his insides.

I can't say I know exactly how you feel, as I don't feel the pain and other symptoms, but I can understand your frustration. Even watching from the sidelines, it's awful seeing no end in sight, not being able to plan for the future etc.

FWIW he also had the nerve block injection. but it had no effect. Hopefully it could be different for you, your pain may be something else.
I have no real advice tbh, but I just wantsd to let you know, you're not alone. We do feel let down by the NHS, they've also washed their hands of DH. No further investigations, just mountains of tramadol and the odd recommendation of paracetamol . I get what you mean about 'keeping you quiet'.

We plan to go private asap and start again, and hope to have someone actually listen.

Good luck and I hope you get some answers soon.

Oh God,don't wear the t shirt,don't ramble and just say what you've said here minus any reference to wonder women.

Hope you get the help you want.

Assuming these are the posts you've attached them to, they aren't visible.

dinosaurs makes a good point about physical limitations. Is the condition you suffer from likely to get worse with childbearing and labour? Is there a chance that you may not be able to fulfil your caring obligations towards your existing child(ren)?