To hate men saying "we" are pregnant?

[brasty]

Or even worse, just watching an interview where a male actor said when "I" was pregnant. No he is not Trans. His female partner was pregnant. Yes you are having a baby together, but only the woman is pregnant.

No I mean the one with the surrogate specifically, they keep calling her pregnant. I even saw one wanky thing about how it was not ok to NOT say she is pregnant, since that would be discriminating against her!

Men saying 'we are pregnant' + woman saying 'my baby' = bad as each other.

I have heard this and I hate it.
It is both a 'modern' thing to say(no man would have claimed to be pregnant years ago) and a very retrograde attitude to women.

feel like saying 'what a shame you'll miss the birth then, as you'll presumably be pushing a baby out of your penis at the same time as your partner is in labour.'

Men saying 'we are pregnant' + woman saying 'my baby' = bad as each other

Well one is stupid and wanky and the other is completely accurate, so you;re wrong on that one.

Yeah with you there existential. Mind boggles at that level of idiocy. Also makes me angry about all the ways our biological experiences are negated and swept away in the name of being inclusive.

What nonsense goldenclaire - one is an idiotic lie and one is the truth.

It should be 'our baby' not 'my baby'. Its double standards else.

@Bisquick it's not that I frown upon it it's just that it's not necessary to fart about expressing into a bottle just so dad can bond more. There are umpteen ways to bond with a baby other than putting a bottle in its mouth. Bathing, baby massage, cuddling, smelling, nappy changing, pushing them in the pram, singing to them etc.

It should be 'our baby' not 'my baby'. Its double standards else

No it's not, at all. I can be either my or ours depending on context. My is by no means wrong.

Surely the same logic applies to 'our pregnancy'?

No, because only one of them is pregnant. Is it the biology or the language you are struggling with?

Firstly, I don't think the term 'we are pregnant' is a big deal in perspective. Secondly, I was just trying to make a point that there is a point of double standards here.

No - pregnancy is a physical state that only happens to one person in an opposite sex couple.
Once the baby has arrived oether parent can say 'my baby' or 'our babay' depneding on circumstances. I would have absolutley no problem with a father picking up his newborn and saying 'how's my baby?', I do have a problem with him saying he is pregnant.

Just like if my partner lost a leg I wouldn't say 'we are an amputee', because one of us isn't.

The only time 'We are pregnant' is acceptable is in a femal same sex couple if both partners are pregnant at the same time.

There are loads of times it's completely in context to say "my baby" or "my son/daughter" and it is accurate and makes sense. A man is never accurate in saying "our pregnancy" or "we're pregnant" because he's not pregnant and never has been...
It's really not that hard to understand.

Totaly, we are having a baby, men are not pregnant.

Firstly, I don't think the term 'we are pregnant' is a big deal in perspective. Secondly, I was just trying to make a point that there is a point of double standards here

Firstly, that's your opinion. Secondly, you are plain wrong.

Iv heard a man say another man is pregnant
He meant the man's wife is pregnant

The original question, and my/our baby terminology; none of it in the big scheme of things is really worth getting in a tiss over really is it though.

No it isn't, so why did you bring up the latter, and argue about it (wrongly)?

Its a problem arising from so many terms and words used interchangeably. Pregnant and having a baby both mean the same at one level. At another it is profoundly different. Of course, pregnancy used to be only about the woman and seen as a womans thing. Now, with things like birthing partners, being in the room as opposed to sitting with other fathers to be in the waiting room, endless appointments that the men are supposed to go to just to be there because their partners get desperately upset when they are not etc does mean that the language has been co-opted to be more inclusive. Perhaps there needs to be a middle ground word that highlights everything a partner is supposed to be doing but is obviously not the actual pregnancy.

Pregnancy still is a womens thing and about the woman. Men do not get pregnant, nothing has changed or will change on that score. We do not need a change in language.

My first post was just saying there is some double standards in pregnancy where woman say its my baby then get shirty when the man says our pregnancy. You're the one who's repeatedly questioned this point i made.

My first post was just saying there is some double standards in pregnancy where woman say its my baby then get shirty when the man says our pregnancy

You're still not getting it. That is not a double standard. "My baby" is perfectly correct and fine" whereas "Our pregnancy" is incorrect and not fine.
This is not an opinion but a matter of accurate language. I am not giving you a different opinion, I am telling you that you are factually wrong.

I don't even agree with "We're having a baby". No, I'm pregnant; I'm having a baby; he's going to be a father; we're both going to be parents.

It's like the whole expressing or bottle feeding so as not to deny men an aspect of parenthood breastfeeding biologically excludes them from

MIL told me breastfeeding was only ever chosen by selfish, wicked mothers who wanted to prevent their babies bonding with Fathers and Grandparents. She's a special sort.

I don't mind "we're having a baby", as it's true. "We're pregnant" is odd, though, and a little pretentious. I think I'd reprimand DH if he used it.