To hate men saying "we" are pregnant?

[brasty]

Or even worse, just watching an interview where a male actor said when "I" was pregnant. No he is not Trans. His female partner was pregnant. Yes you are having a baby together, but only the woman is pregnant.

I hate it too.
Luckily my DH never said it, but we have friends who used to say it all the time would make me cringe every time.

Can't stand it - my sister announced it as we're pregnant and refers to it now as when we were pregnant. It's awful.

YANBU. There was a recent Stuart Heritage piece in the Guardian which described how his wife "was rushed into theatre for the couple's second emergency caesarean". WTF.

I would have written to complain except that the piece was actually about the loss of his mother so it would have felt a bit churlish so I'll just complain here instead

I very much dislike it when men say that. Or women. Winds me right up.

They can claim it when they can grow their own baby and squeeze it out of their own nether regions. Until then, nope.

Out of interest, is 'we're breastfeeding' in the same league of wrongness? I know it's technically incorrect but i'm thinking that since the alternative, bottlefeeding, would be a 'we' I can imagine a 'we're going to persevere with breastfeeding' comment being meant positively to show that the father is supportive of the choice where him just saying 'she is....' might look like he is not on board.
I know that's not really the thread but i remember dh using 'we' in context of breastfeeding (I struggled) and i felt like it was teamwork rather than smug/wrong/annoying, which I think 'we're pregnant' is. Just curious!

That I don't mind... but when my partner said it on the context of talking about how sick I was during pregnancy,...."we are ao ill atm"......well........ I shot him down quick about that! ! '

dontknow

The men who say ‘we are’ rarely share the load even when they can, so it’s still not likely to be a we with bottle feeding.

They just talk the talk and sound like dicks

Agreed. Very silly.

It makes me cringe, but I never know if that's my chippy single parent reaction to anything 'smug married'-ish. But then again I wouldn't be subconsciously envious of a couple who were that creepy and weird... would I? Tough one!

I would slap DH if he ever said it!

I hate it. Only the woman (or one of the women in a same sex relationship) is pregnant. As such, it's not "we are pregnant".

Perhaps it's a regional thing. I've never once heard a man say this, I've heard women say it but that is rare in my experience.

"We are expecting a baby" or words to that effect is quite common in my experience but almost never "we are pregnant", and on the rare occasions that I've heard the latter it's never been a man saying it.

Ha! Never heard this in real life. "We are expecting a baby" yes, but never "we are pregnant" or the other rubbish.
YANBU it's ridiculous!
And not sure "we are not having any pain relief" is any less obnoxious than a man who takes no interest whatsoever in the pregnancy.

Euurrrggghhh "we are pregnant" is absolutely ghastly

I will happily tear DH a new one if he says this when I get pregnant.

Id never heard it said by anyone before but now that i have, it doesnt bother me and sounds quite cute for the couple involved

It's worse when they say, "We're not having any pain relief during labour."

If my DH ever thinks about saying that during labour, I will tightly grab hold of his bollocks and see how long that attitude lasts. Thankfully he isn't like that.

ive heard we are having a baby - which is accurate but never we are pregnant - id be suggesting he had fingers stuffed up his cock

YANBU. I dislike it. However I have a (male) friend who's wife is pregnant after maybe 5 or 6 years of trying, countless miscarriages etc. who says "we're pregnant" and he is so utterly ecstatic that I find it hard to begrudge him, even if he is technically incorrect. In general, for the most part, I think it comes from a place of good intention/enthusiasm about having a baby from the father, rather than being smug.
But "we don't need pain relief" is a whole other level of twattishness/controlling behaviour and not comparable with "we're pregnant". Being pregnant is something to do with the father, pain relieve decisions lie purely with the mother and any man who tries to influence the mother is an utter cock in my book.

On a similar note I keep seeing articles referring to that Kardashian woman as being pregnant. She is expecting a baby via surrogate, she is not by any meaning of the word pregnant!

I hate it. I hate it. I hate it.
I was never pregnant, I don't have a womb or any of the other required organs.

All Most of the men I've heard say it are self-aggrandising wankers trying to make a big deal of "Oooh, see me supporting my DP in 'our' pregnancy" ... support isn't what you say, it is what you do.

It makes my toes curl.

It's like the whole expressing or bottle feeding so as not to deny men an aspect of parenthood breastfeeding biologically excludes them from. A woman is pregnant. The man made her pregnant but he himself never can never will be pregnant. Fact.

It is like even something they don't go through has to still be about them.

Continuing the rant it's also just saccharine.

existentialmoment - depends actually - two of the other kardashian-Jenner sisters are pregnant so might have been referring to them. As for Kim - yes she isn't pregnant, just expecting a baby. Although she's had two such horrendous pregnancies I won't begrudge her that.

As an aside why do you hate this?
It's like the whole expressing or bottle feeding so as not to deny men an aspect of parenthood breastfeeding biologically excludes them from.

I was planning to do this - not sure I understand why it's frowned upon.