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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

My 16 year old has just told me...

403 replies

itwasadarkandstormy · 04/10/2017 11:26

... that all his friends are given £200 a week by their parents as spending money. I'm calling bullshit.

Actually, I feel like I've had the stuffing knocked out of me. I thought I was generous at about £80 a week.

So, AIBU?

OP posts:
DeleteOrDecay · 04/10/2017 11:43

£200 a weekShock definitely bullshit. Some people earn around that much working full time for minimum wage. Although to be honest, even £80 a week is very very generous. I used to get that per month at that age.

5rivers7hills · 04/10/2017 11:44

I buy clothes and toiletries

What is the £80 a week for then?

That is a crazy amount of disposable income.

PigletWasPoohsFriend · 04/10/2017 11:44

Of course I mention getting a job. Every. Bloody. Day

Why would he bother when you buy all clothing and toiletries and give him £80 a week.

SleepFreeZone · 04/10/2017 11:44

I'm still incredulous.

paxillin · 04/10/2017 11:45

Of course I mention getting a job. Every. Bloody. Day

Reduce his pocket money to UK average (under £10 per week) and watch him find a job flipping burgers immediately.

Northend77 · 04/10/2017 11:45

You need to stop giving him money if he's not taking getting a job seriously. He has absolutely no incentive to do so. I stopped getting pocket money at 16 and got a saturday job to earn it

puddingpen · 04/10/2017 11:45

Ahahahahaha! I have a moderately well-payed job and I give myself £50 spending money a week!!

steppemum · 04/10/2017 11:45

Oh this thread is funny - I downloaded and didn't refresh before I posted, and wrote £80 a week!!

Then refreshed and every single person put £80 a week!!!

unanimous then!

LanaKanesLeftNippleTassle · 04/10/2017 11:46

You buy clothes and toiletries and still give him £80 a week?? Shock

Thats bloody loads!

I would have said a lot less than that, and he'd still have to buy his own clothes!

16 yr olds in my town are lucky to get enough to buy a Maccy Ds a week!

We had to work out how to earn our own money at that age if we wanted anything more than the odd thing!

Bloody hell.

Mumof217 · 04/10/2017 11:46

When i hit 16 my parents cut me off no spending money no paying for my clothes hair make up etc. They only brought me the bare esstentials i had to go and get a part time job to earn what i wanted a good life lesson. Ive never heard of parents giving such massive amounts of pocket money to children that old or maybe i just live in a poor area lol

Talkietalk · 04/10/2017 11:46

OP stop giving him money (or at least reduce it) give him an incentive to work and earn now. It will be better in the long run. My friend's son is 18 and cant be bothered to go to college or work (fired from two PT jobs as he never turned up) as everything was paid for (and still is). She has resorted to threatening eviction and he isnt bothered.

KurriKurri · 04/10/2017 11:46

If his friends are getting £200 a week, their monthly income is more than mine and I have to pay bills and food !

I'd be taking £10 off his £80pw (how does he earn that ?) everytime he mentions his friends' parents fictional generosity.

BrieAndChilli · 04/10/2017 11:46

Kids do need more money nowadays than when we were teenagers (we didn’t have mobile phones to top up, things weren’t as exapensive)
Kids do have more expensive tastes nowadays - we used tunnel make up, teenagers nowadays use MAC and othe rexpensive brands that I can’t wven afford as a grown up!

The other thing is depending on where you live jobs are hard to come by especially for a teenager still in school.

Bluntness100 · 04/10/2017 11:46

You give your 16 year old 320 quid a month pocket money? I call BS on that. Grin

OOAOML · 04/10/2017 11:46

£80 a week??? My 14yr old gets £15 a month. We also give her lunch money for school and buy her clothes and basic toiletries.

OOAOML · 04/10/2017 11:47

Oh, and we also pay for her phone.

Malib1 · 04/10/2017 11:47

I got peanuts compared to my friends who got £700 - £1,000 a month. We did go to a nice school in Surrey, is that we're you are? If so, he is probably telling the truth.

TeeBee · 04/10/2017 11:47

Ha ha ha. Good luck to him for trying. I cannot believe how much money you give him! Mine get £20/month (and I could afford to give them much more but don't). Some of they have to contribute to the upkeep of the dog that they wanted, and some towards their phones. Where the hell is the motivation to work when you are lining his pockets? Ditch the pocket money and kick him out to find a paper round. The best thing that you can give him is a work ethic.

ColdTattyWaitingForSummer · 04/10/2017 11:47

My 15 year old gets £10 a week plus an extra £5 if I go out of an evening and he watches his younger brother. I pay a phone contract for him, but that was his main Christmas present. He gets a clothing allowance of £100 every 2 months, but I very rarely buy him clothes outside of that (I wanted him to learn to budget). £80-200 sounds insane!! (Although I guess would make more sense if it covered clothes, bus fares, lunches etc.)

LanaKanesLeftNippleTassle · 04/10/2017 11:48

He'd be at Mac Ds quicker than you can say "burger flipping" if you gave him a proper amount of money.

Why get a job when mum buys all you clothes and aftershave, and you still get money to go out??

I hope he does a fuckton around the house for that, otherwise where will a work ethic come from??

Talkietalk · 04/10/2017 11:48

Dont nag - drive him out to make job enquiries (at 16 I made sure I got a job due to the embarrassment factor just to stop it :)!)

SusanTheGentle · 04/10/2017 11:48

That is a huge amount of money just for walking around cash. Unless he's being expected to pay for his own phone and clothes and lunches out of that, even then it's a bit much.

Tell him that as a result of his transparent attempt at bullshitting you you've reconsidered the whole set up and he's getting £15 a week so he can have lunch most days, and if he needs more he can get a job.

Wormulonian · 04/10/2017 11:48

The most I have known is £20 a week and mobile paid. The twins who got that frittered it away on books, music and games they rarely read or played.
I have 5 kids aged 16-28 they went to schools in "naice" areas and the norm was/is £20-30 a month pocket money, a cheap mobile contract paid for and some extra cash if going out with mates to restaurant or event for a birthday or for a bakery snack on the way home from school..

One girl had an "allowance" from which she had to buy all her clothes, pay for phone, social life etc it was about £450 every 3 months.

JSA is only £57 a week for under 25's and many have to pay all their bills plus food etc from that.

I call BS on both £200 and £80

Riddo · 04/10/2017 11:49

My 17 year old DS gets £22 per week to cover food not bought at school (he has an account there which I credit), travel ( he usually cycles), non essential clothing and anything else he wants. He has a couple of irregular hours jobs and pays for his Spotify and half his phone contract.

He has a lot more to spend on himself than DH and I do!

Fauxtatoes · 04/10/2017 11:49

DD gets €20 but she works in the house for it doing chores.

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