To think a 40 minute drive is too far for a commute?

[bubblesdotcom]

DD is 20 and is planning on going to uni next year. Her favourite uni is a 40 minute drive away. She would like to stay at home.

AIBU to think it's too far?

No. Indo 30 mins to work.
I was a non driver at uni and I had to leave at 7:30 for a 9 o'clock lecture

Most of my students do commute actually. An hour is common, many do more. The campus living of old still exists, but is getting rarer now. Depends on the college.

I see, I think the question you're asking is a slightly different one then. Is a 40 minute commute too far, well no obviously not.

But will she be able to take full part in campus life, no, and that would also be the case if it was a 10 minute commute tbh. She won't have her own space in halls and it will be that much harder to build an identity and a friendship group.

I commute to uni - 2.5 hours each way across two busses, two trains and short walks between.

In my final year of uni I lived at home and commuted to London, it was a 30 min drive then a 2.5 hour train then a 20 min tube. I wouldn't have done it in first year, living on campus was an amazing experience and helped me bond with others. Loved it!

In fact I was sort of assuming she actively didn't want that social life which is why she's intending to live at home and go to a uni 40 mins away...

OP, are you perhaps keen to see her in halls so she can really embrace the life, hence the question? Sorry if I have wrong end of the stick.

No, I don't think it's too far. After the first year when I lived on campus, I moved a 20 minute bus ride from campus (as did everyone else I knew except one who was too ill to leave campus). Factor in waiting for buses and walk to and from the bus stop and I imagine that was about 40 mins or not much less. That was living in the same city where I went to university.

The first year on campus was fun and meant it was an easy walk from the union bar after a night out, but with university fees being so ridiculous now, I imagine most students take it more seriously than my friends and I did! If I was doing it now, I'd take the reduced rent at home and commute.

I don't think it is an unreasonable commute but going to uni isn't the same as working so it might depend on how much she wants to engage with the social side of uni.

Are the issues financial or practical, why do you think it's too long?

I have to agree that socially it's too far. It would be fine if she was only interested in getting a degree, and essentially treated the uni experience as like getting a job and socialising with her 'home' friends, but she'll miss out on a lot of the other sides of uni.

If she really wants to go there, can you suggest halls at least to start with, is there a particular reason she wants to stay at home?

Not for uni but years ago I did a 90 min each way commute for 3 years. Twas very dull but doable.

It takes us 40 minutes to get to primary school. I used to do an hour and a half commute to university. Don't be ridiculous. 40 minutes is nothing.

Not at all! 40 minutes is nothing

Loads of people commute to uni. Why do you think they don't? Especially how expensive it is now many live at home.

It isn't a great commute -- quite do-able so let your DD try it. It might well be that she'll make the decision herself to leave home. Is she nervous about it?
Would she consider trying for a hall of residence the first year with a view to commuting home on Fridays? Once she got involved with social activities/made friends and felt comfortable she' probably opt to spend weekends there.

She's not nervous, no. She is just rather grown up now (will be almost 21 when she starts) and has had a full time job here etc.

My cousin did it back in the day when university courses were free. Same sort of commute time. I thought it strange. Less strange these days. Your dd is an adult. Her life. Her choice.

My commute was 2 hours each way by train, I managed it ok

It's not too far for studying, but is likely to be more of a problem in terms of clubs/societies/ sports/ volunteering/social life. Depending on her course and what she wants to do once she graduated, being able to participate in those social activities can be a huge advantage in getting a job after she graduates.

I commuted four and a half hours a day, five days a week to uni for five years. It did the job.

I've had various jobs over the last three years, with a commute of 40 - 50 minutes. This was after many years with a commute of less than 15 minutes, and before that 5 minutes.

I was not sure about the commute at all (especially as the M25 was involved) but needs must, but it has been fine. The 50 minutes was too much for me, so I would pitch for 40 minutes standard as the maximum.

Of course, traffic plays a part, so sometimes coming home, I am more like 50 minutes, but not every day. I leave early to avoid traffic, which is probably not something a student wants to do - check that the commute time is realistic for the time she wants to drive. Saying that, uni libraries tend to be around the clock.

I use the Wase app on my phone every day to make sure I am not running into bad London traffic and I have found it to be really helpful.

She's not nervous, no. She is just rather grown up now

She may not miss the social aspect all that much then? I'd let her try it for the first year, if that's what she wants, and she can always move into a house next year if she isn't happy commuting from home.

I don't think the commute is too far, no. I don't know many people whose commute is less than that, and some do way more.

However, she really won't be the only student who is slightly older and I think it's a shame for her to miss out on a full uni experience and stay living at home.

Still, it's her choice obviously and you must be doing a lot right OP if you have a twenty year old who would rather live with their mum

If she has her own vehicle she can still socialise and take part in clubs and societies. She obviously wouldn't be able to participate in boozy campus partying, but would she want to be doing that with a bunch of 18 year olds anyway...?

My commute was 40 min on a good day. A friend on my course had a 2 hour commute there and on a fridai9if our last lecture was until 5pm her commute home was usually 4+ hours due to traffic.