Old folks dying of,,,,,,old age?

[MrsDeltaB]

Whilst I appreciate there is a general outpouring of someone or the actor of a character that you may have grown up with.

Liz Dawn. Died at 77. Yes. Sad. To her family. But why the outpouring of grief to a person of elder generation who may or may not have simply died of old age?

I can't help but get cross when folks are 'gutted' 'devastated' about the death of an old person dying of, being old! "97 year old died of old age'

I wouldn’t class 77 as elderly or old age
My Nan is coming up to 88. Her time will be up sooner rather then later I know that, but I will still be devastated when she goes

YABVVU

If I had a choice of living to 76 and going out like a lightbulb or lingering on til nearly 90 in a state of fear, confusion with advanced Alzheimer's disease. I wouldn't even think about. It

I agree. One of my biggest fears/worries is becoming ill/disabled at the end of my life and suffering for years with cancer/altzheimers/effects of a stroke etc. That is more of a tragedy than simply expiring earlier at an age that is still a decent life expectancy.

Some people are lucky enough to live a relatively healthy, active life at 80/90/100 but many aren't.

Of course these things famously come in threes, so as well as Tony Booth and Liz Dawn, Bobby Knutt also died suddenly this week at a slightly younger age of 71. Maybe under 75 is slightly more of a tragedy, but over 75 is probably getting into 'a good innings' terriotary.

www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-england-south-yorkshire-41387455

I think it is because when our relatives die past a certain age, we are told "well, she/he had a good innings" and aren't permitted to be more than a little bit sad about it. So, when an older celebrity dies, you can sublimate your grief for great aunts and grandparents.

I do think our generation will be living until at least 90 on the whole. Did anyone see that tv programme about the 100 year old driver last night? People in their 100s retaking their driving tests and passing with flying colours. One woman was so sharp and so lively you would never ever think she was 100 and something. I think there must be a lot of people wandering about like her who are over 100 nowadays and it's only set to grow.

I understand OP. Of course each death is sad but some people acknowledge that you can start to expect it when people get older. 77 is no spring chicken either. A lot of people die at that age or younger. My gran was 71, my mum was 62, my aunt was 79. Fitness level doesn't mecessarily have to decline first. A heart attack can happen at any time. A lot of people don't live till their eighties or nineties. We should treasure each moment with our loved ones.

My Grandad used to say "I hope to live to be three score and ten. Anything after that is a bonus" and he had a few bonus years. I feel the same but my own parents are in their 60s and I'm not ready to lose them.

My mum died suddenly last month aged 67. I'm glad that she just scrapped into your criteria so I'm allowed to find it shocking and grieve accordingly. I would have felt the same had it happened in 3 years though.

And yet on another thread there are people saying that once a person hits 60 they should give their children power of attorney and on the same thread people are advocating hiding cameras in an older person's home, taking over their bank accounts etc because "you never know that they're in control of their faculties."

As for "You don't just hit a certain age and your body switches off." yes you can. Both my great grandmothers just died one day. One aged 85 died in her sleep and the other was 97, she was a bit frail but still living at home and still very much alive, her son came round helped her to bed, she gave a little sigh and then she was gone. No underlying illnesses, nothing. People do just die sometimes.

Shocked to hear about Bobby Knutt. I loved him in Benidorm. I just read that his wife ( former Olympic athlete Donna Hartley) died at just 58 while sunbathing in the garden. In a few years you will have to work to age 68 so 77 is not old.

I simply don't think 77 is particularly old. Well into retirement, yes. But I don't see elderly as until 80 and good innings beyond that.

But not elderly, though I suppose it does show who respects the Bible and the 3score years and 10.

Some of you must be extremely young and immature to consider the age of 70 as very old
DH is 65 and I would like to think that he isn’t going to peg out in 5 years time.

My mum died at 72, but she was in terrible health – she also died of emphysema (she was a very heavy smoker, and it is a horrible way to die). I still think of 72 as too young to die.

And as for dementia not being the cause of death, figures from the Office for National Statistics show that dementia is the most common cause of death in England and Wales now.

My dad is 95 and outliving a lot of other people. People say isnt it amazing, but really its just the age he happens to be now. My sil died 49. my friends dad died at 67.
If you dont have any quality of life then i wouldnt want to carry on living, but debates about this are always shut down.

I’m in my 60’s and a bit miffed to discover I’m due to be dead soon from old age and no one will care because I’m so old and shit.

lol

I don't get why you are "cross" about how someone else grieves a loss? It's much healthier to recognise your emotions than not. It doesn't stop being sad no matter what age a person is.

My mum died suddenly last month aged 67. I'm glad that she just scrapped into your criteria so I'm allowed to find it shocking and grieve accordingly

I found my supremely healthy, still-working mum after she dropped dead at 74. It was easily the most shocking thing that has ever happened to me.

Her death wasn't "tragic" in the same way that a 45 year old's would have been, but it was certainly just as shocking - to me and those who knew her - because of her (apparent) great health.

I mustn't complain though. By OP's reckoning, her death should have come as no surprise given her aged state.

Exactly Francis

My grandmother is still alive in her 90's and whilst it's wonderful that she's here her quality of life is rubbish. Mentally she's great, still reading, having opinions on things that are none of her business, watching the news and spending time with her family. But her body is frail and getting frailer. I'd love her to be here until she's 100 but I hope she's not, it's no life for her. Her friends have died, she can't drive any more, she's in constant pain. When she dies it will be incredibly sad but it absolutely won't be a shock, it will be a completion of life's circle and it does make we wonder if living until a really old age is something we should all aspire to? If you've your health then great but to rot away and decline until you're just too frail to go on is just no life

I too 'get' the OP although the phrasing could have been better and the discussion would be less adversarial if she had not choses the recent death of Liz.

"Old age' is a recognised cause of death and is allowed on death certificates.
Somebody over 80 (according to the Procurator Fiscal where I work) with no particular health concerns who is not currently ill but is found dead in their bed will likely be certified as 'Old Age' and I think that is fine.

Life is a terminal condition that always ends in death - I find that thought strangely comforting, bizarrely.
And as a society we seem to have 'forgotten' that simple fact. There is so much preventative medicine that it almost seems like nobody is allowed to die of anything. 'In this day and age' death should no longer be acceptable or something.

While it is lovely that so many people in their 70s and 80s are very sprightly and well, they still are old and there is no arguing with biology.

Oh, and sudden death, while possibly a blessing for the person who died, are always horrible and shocking to those left behind.
So sorry to anybody who has to live with this experience

Like you OP, I lost my dad as a teenager, he was in his late 40s. I think this really changes your view on stuff like this. Although I'm not sure I'm right to feel like this.

I see your point but i dont think 77 is old enough to 'just' die

I think late 80's and definitely 90's is the sort of age where i would say they had a 'good innings'

I think 70's is still young

MIL dies recently at 72 and as far as i am concerned with earlier treatment she would have gone on for much longer

(Although both sides of my family and dhs seem to die in their 60's back in the day...with one or two notable exceptions)

I understand what you mean op. My grandad is 96 and has been waiting to die for many years now. Sadly his healthy lifestyle has kept his body working impeccably without medication. Sadly his mind has broken and he's had dementia for a few years now.

I'll be sad when he dies but not bereft like i was when my nan died