To wonder how much breastfeeding matters 14 years on?

[ringle]

Genuine question. I bf both my kids with relatively few problems, mostly because I found it enjoyable.

But looking back it doesn't seem that big a deal.

What's prompted this is a couple of people testifying on another thread that their ongoing efforts to bf drove them to depression.

What are the stats?

Please, we need to get away from the idea that "my bf/ff fed child is fine therefore bf/ff is best". You will not find the evidence you are looking for at an individual level. Long term population studies are what is required.

initial rates of bf aren't that low it's the sustained bf past 12 months or 24 months that are. lots of societal reasons for that sadly.
on another note, my dd's hv ticked the "not breastfeeding" box in the red book when my dd went in at 2 years of age. she was still bf and entered the data incorrectly.

No one is going to say breastfeeding matters. We have a formula feeding culture which is dominant, breastfeeding is seen as a weird thing to do, or an obsessive martyrish thing to do, or hippyish, or misguided based on bad science and so on. It's not normalised and accepted as just a thing that women do to feed babies. I think that the NHS and other bodies should stop wasting their time and money trying to promote it or persuade women to try it. That ship has sailed. Just spend whatever money there is on practical support for those who are breastfeeding and leave it at that.

For me, and for my little family, it was massively important.

I had twins at 27 weeks. I felt like a complete and utter failure, that something I had done / didn't do caused them to come early. BF was my way of "making up for it" - giving them the nutrition they would otherwise have had if I'd gone to term. Looking back now, it wasn't necessarily for the health benefits - although I do know from my time on NICU (2 months) how much the medical staff encouraged and helped me to BF - it was for my mental health.

It took a long time for me to get over the guilt of going into premature labour and putting my babies through such a rocky start - the BF helped assuage those feelings.

I am pleased that I breast-fed, and I am proud of the fact that I persevered to get through a stage that was excruciatingly painful (with both children) - because, like every mother, I want to do the best I can for them.

But to every mother out there that formula-fed, I guarantee you there are things you could and can do for your children that I wasn't able to, for whatever reason. I refuse to beat myself up for not being a perfect parent, because I did the best I could in the circumstances I found myself in - like the vast majority of parents. Whether or not they bf or ff, no matter how their baby was delivered, regardless of whether they are in a couple of not. The vast majority of parents do the best they can. And that is, in the most part, good enough.

It's impossible to know if my children would be different had they been ff, and it's pointless to speculate.

Evidence used by WHO review.

apps.who.int/iris/bitstream/10665/79198/1/9789241505307_eng.pdf

In truth, I suspect higher IQ and higher income in adults who were breastfed as a baby is probably related to class as much as anything else with significantly fewer breastfeeding mothers from lower socioeconomic groups in UK.

ferrier
You are right. However, people are not looking a feeding choices at a population level in the UK and putting in place a properly supported national strategy. It is individual mothers who get judged so individual mothers give their view.
It would be a good thing if the discussion moved to the population level and away from the individual.

ringle yes. Women are vulnerable to depression postpartum and if it occurs and we're not well supported with it we can become more vulnerable to future episodes. It's uncontroversial in health research (unlike the bf/ff debate) that having a depressed mum isn't good for a child. One of the best things a mother can do for her baby is make sure she is as OK, well-rested and well supported as possible. If being OK means ff, then ff is the healthiest choice.

I ff my DS.

I didn't want to breastfeed. I was happy for me and by DH to be able to take turns and my DS was a mammoth eater.

He's rarely ill and a bright little chap.

And I do think the motto "breast is best....and sometimes it's not" is a mantra to live by if you're a new mum

I think Brazil have just completed a long term study on the affects of breastfeeding, taking into account the class system in their analysis.

It was in favour of nursing by a few percentage points but not oustanding.

Im proud of my choice to breastfeed and just wish people would get off my back about my decision and for other mothers to stop defending their choices for formula feeding - i really couldnt care less that you do.

I sometimes think, at some point in the future, we will all have to FF as breast milk will be so full of contaminants, I'm sure there was a study (I may of made this up).
My dd bf for a good long while, but I can't see any advantage given, she is fairly healthy - but every generation seems to get healthier.
I agree support to mothers is dire all round regarding infant feeding.
I arrogantly didn't think bf would present problems (luckily it didn't ) as it's just what every ones did/does in my family, but then really panicked when I realised I didn't know how to make a bottle if I needed to.
Then I found MN .
Now I'm of the opinion it's all just another stick to beat women with, it's fucking hard to hear a woman who's carried and given birth to a whole new person talk of herself as a "failure".

It's massive. My dd is 35. Having breastfed her until she was four, we have a fabulous bond. The best thing for me? She fed her own baby even longer. You know you were right when they do that.

I EBF until 8 weeks but my baby was feeding23 out of 24 hours a day continuesly and not gaining weight so started to combi feed until 6 months when she was weaned and she just stopped asking for it.

I felt like a massive failure but she's now nearly 2 and a half, rarely ill and is extremely close to me.

Crumbs
Have you read the conclusion of that review. It shows little evidence of most of the benefits. IQ possibly a 2.2 point increase and no meaningful impact on things like total cholesterol and blood pressure

16, 17, and 20 years on and it doesn't even figure. I bf all of them but I finished at 6 weeks with one because I knew I would end up depressed and dreading feeding my child if I didn't (was already half-way there). I live in a place where nearly every woman of my education level/job type/location breastfeeds for at least a year. Most of them go back to part time work after 4 months and pump so they can continue for the year. It is a very pro-bfeeding culture and I know I was judged or at least people wondered at me for stopping so early. Didn't bother me then and doesn't bother me now.

There were other decisions we made that have had a far far greater effect on our children - schools being a big one, where we live is another.

I had a great bond with my mother and she adopted me.

I hated BF with a passion - definitely nearly tipped me into depression with both mine which is why I stopped.

I was devastated and made to feel like shit by a number of people (including posters on here).

My DC are now 9 & 10, the healthiest kids you could ever meet (never been to the Doctors with either of them), both v bright and no allergies whatsoever.

I think the fuss about bf is massively overrated.

Canada has increased the length of time for maternity benefits from 12 to 18 months (you have to qualify and you get a reduced rate for the 18 months) but one of the reasons given was to encourage longer bf. so it will be interesting to see if it changes our rate of long term bf.

It's massive. My dd is 35. Having breastfed her until she was four, we have a fabulous bond. The best thing for me? She fed her own baby even longer. You know you were right when they do that

People who don't breastfeed have fabulous bonds too. The best thing about your daughter having a baby is that she breastfed her baby for a long time too? Why? It's up to her how she feeds and seems a strange thing to concern yourself about. It's her baby. Not yours. Would you have been just as proud and fabulous about her if she'd have turned round and said she was never going to breastfeed? If you would, then fair enough.
It's personal choice/circumstances and nothing to do with being "right" or "wrong."
Neither choices are wrong.

It's really no big deal at all. A lot of the fuss around it stems from the same place as all the fuss about whether half a white wine spritzer when you're pregnant will lead to your baby being born with three eyes and no feet - misogyny. It's all about making sure that women are constantly guilty, anxious, inclined to police and bully each other and never able to forget that they are not quite autonymous human beings, because their primary purpose is to be walking incubators and rearers of children.

I had, actually, intended to BF mine, but couldn't. That's when I found the other great benefit of FF - you get time off. You can leave the baby with someone else and go to the pub without your tits exploding, for example.

I didn't bf dc1 (didn't want to) but did dc2 and 3. None of mine are sickly but there's a noticeable difference in the frequency of illnesses between dc1 (more chest/ear infections/tonsilitis) and dc2&3 (rare for dc2 and dc3 who's almost 3 has yet to have anything other than a cold). Dc1 has a tendency to verge on overweight but dc2&3 are very slender. Dc1 has an allergy, dc2&3 have no allergies. I dont think its coincidental.

ReanimatedSGB I bf and do recall wondering at 3am one morning, possibly crazed with sleep deprivation (while my partner slept the sleep of the unlactating in the spare room) whether the whole breast is best thing wasn't some Machiavellian male conspiracy

Reanimated - I may have been able to Leave the baby with someone else to go to the pub but I didn't want to.

That's an interesting comment above thread about mums opinions of their adult daughters breastfeeding. I remember reading a forum of BF mothers who were debating that topic and most of them said they would be devastated if their daughter's didn't BF. I thought that was really sad

There is no 'right' decision in feeding anymore IMO. Only what is right for that individual family.

Breastfeeding is the norm so to talk of benefits or "higher IQ" etc is incorrect and the language around BF is part of the problem. I was BF so my IQ is what it is.

A dentist might be able to tell the difference between a BF and bottle fed child.
Your gastric bacteria would also betray how you were fed.
It matters for the environment-it is free and has no footprint.
It matters for the mum-lower rates of female cancers.
I think it must matter a lot to the baby at the time as they seem to love it but 14 years later no they won't remember!

The question should be "does not BF make a difference? What risks are there in not BF?"

I doubt this will be a popular view but it's the truth.

Expectations are low-many times I was told "ah never mind if you can't BF". Actually I did mind (we struggled a great deal at the start)-why should I not be able to BF?! Why is the expectation that I won't be able to?!

Postnatally you have people who have never breastfed trying to help new mums breastfeed. Which is like a non driver trying to be a driving instructor.