To think a single man travelling to Thailand regularly is up to no good

[Katyazamo]

My uncle (who I am not particularly close to) travels to Thailand alone several times a year. He is in his mid 50s and has lived with my grandad since divorcing his wife around 20 years ago.
It's suddenly occurred to me that he's probably up to no good :/
AIBU?

It's really only women that are charmingly naive about this.

If you were to ask a man what he thought of another man travelling to Thailand alone regularly, you can bet your bottom dollar he'd assume the same as many of us.

Fff *convicted

YANBU, I think he's doing somethings suspect too.

When we were PhD students, there was a lecturer who made frequent trips to Thailand. Nice place, lucky him. Turned out he had a penchant for boys. When it came out, he killed himself. Apparently most of his colleagues couldn't believe it ... except the one whose sons had had to fend off his advances...

This was a personable married man with a good career, not the stereotype loser some have mentioned.

So yes, I'm not so naive now, I'd be suspicious of a man who regularly visited Thailand unless there was some clear business reason.

if the accounts of men who've been bled dry by Thai brides they brought back to the UK are anything to go by. It happened to a guy I used to employ and he'll never be free of the debt

I have zero sympathy for men who buy women to marry and have sex with (knowing full well these women otherwise wouldn’t touch them with a shitty stick), only to get fleeced for money. Boo fucking hoo.

It’s fucking misogynistic when people are more horrified at money being stolen than women being raped on a regular basis (yes I would call a man who uses prostitutes/buys a woman a rapist)

* I know a couple of men with Thai brides, they seem very happy. Couple of children, they all work, have freedom to go out as and when they please, money to spend etc. The men are actually decent men who have been messed around by British women because they're too nice/not all that attractive.*

FFS. Men are not entitled to good women, not even the ugly ones. it’s just cliched bullshit to say “British women are mean so I go to Thai women”. Come on! But the women have a wee bit of pocket money so it’s all good

araiwa children means under 18, I can assure you underage girls are being used for sex in Thailand. Just because they’re 14 and not 4 it doesn’t make it any less of a crime.

I wonder if the naivety of this thread is genuine or perhaps internalised misogyny?

YANBU.

I travel to Thailand with work and standing in the very long slow line at immigration you really get plenty of time to look at other travellers. Its about 40% backpackers, 10% holidaying couples and 50% grim single male travellers aged 35-65yrs.

Thailand is beautiful, friendly and can be a paradise, but visit places like Pattaya where I and it's a meat market the total opposite.

The men are actually decent men who have been messed around by British women because they're too nice/not all that attractive.

OMFG.

Maybe they were messed around because they’re creepy twats.

This thread is depressing, seeing women value other women so low

One of my friends at school had an Asian mother (Vietnamese I think) and European father. They had met in Europe, while both at uni here, but the amount of comments they got about "Thai brides" was appalling and I think some of the posters on this thread are making similar assumptions about couples they know.

It's likely that a single man travelling to Thailand regularly will be doing so at least partially for the sex, but unlike other posts I'm not going to say it's 100%. I'm sure there are some men who go there for the beaches, cheap alcohol, temples, etc.

Two male members on my DH's side of the family regularly goes to Thailand. One of them admits it quite happily it's for sex. The other I suspect is the same. I have no respect for either of them.

I go several times a year, my wine is Thai.there is a bit of a scene in pattaya but all the western men of my acquaintance are very happihappily married and many come here for golf , sports , food even for the culture! You are unreasonable to assume he is a dirty old man, not all men are as bad as women seem to think.

See you, - how on earth do you know what those guys are getting up to whilst you're not with them?

Thanks cherry but i know what children means

The point i am making is that some people here are saying that child prostitution is the main reason and that the streets are full of old men with girls or boys under 18. It is simply untrue.

@CherryChasingDotMuncher

"I wonder if the naivety of this thread is genuine or perhaps internalised misogyny?"

Anyone who doesn't assume the worst about a man is internalising misogyny?

Really?

Do explain more. He could be visiting prostitutes. Could be a cross dresser or ladyboy. He might have a thing for cross dressers or lady boys or underage people. Who knows. He might simply realise the benefits of cheaper and better holidays.

This thread is disgusting. Racism, out and out sexism and now accusations by you that anyone who doesn't think the worst and assume he's guilty must hate women.

Should this thread be moved to classics?

I wonder if the naivety of this thread is genuine or perhaps internalised misogyny.

It's not naivety.

i was repulsed y all the sex tourists in bangkok and thailand in general. absolutely vile. a friend of DH's travels there regularly for work and we've just discovered he sleeps with hookers every time. he's married with a small child.

yes there's great street food and temples but honestly, not enough to keep you going back time after time.

grim, grim, grim.

Ick. Shudders. I agree, no good.

Sex tourism is very big business. Lots of men do travel to Thailand for this.
This.

I spent time with my FIL and his Thai bride and their community . I had to stop going when the most beautiful girl who was in fact 20 but looked 13 was married to a gross, fat , smelly man in his 60's . My heart broke for her as she clung onto her fellow Thai ladies who were further on in their journey . My fil to be fair is great for his age and a kind man and his wife is ' only ' about 25 years younger than him... in his own words though he didn't like British women his age because they were fat and old 🤷‍♀️

* Anyone who doesn't assume the worst about a man is internalising misogyny?*

You’re just being obtuse now sharks.

And I’m not sure you understand what internalise misogyny means.

Women falling over themselves to minimise bad behaviour of rapists? And one woman has even blamed British women for men (most likely) using prostitutes! This thread is awful

Why do you think men go all the way to Thailand to do this? Because the culture of sex tourism, coupled with the fact that prostitutes will do anything with anyone because they’re so impoverished, means that the men can have sex with all the power. Men who prefer that, to have good old fashioned sex where there’s equality of power, are vile, and they are plenty. Dress it up all you want, these men go for one thing

Agh bold fail again!

It's popular for the luxury holiday set too. I know single people (men and women) who go in groups to 5 star hotels and resorts they wouldn't be able to afford in other countries.

We love se asia so I've been to or through bangkok airport more often than I've flown through Gatwick.

The seedy looking mid 50s man with a paunch trailing a younger thai woman behind him through the airport is a depressingly familiar sight. The worst thing is that if you watch them, there's never any conversation or interaction.

We try to stay away from the worst areas of bangkok but I'd imagine whatever your sexual preference, it could be accommodated there. We once wandered to patpong market and Dp was approached (in front of me) by girls who looked no more than early teens in age.

Wider Thailand is very different- you'd struggle to spot anything like this in chiang mai, so I think it depends where these men are going. Nobody would go to bangkok for a relaxing holiday though, especially several times a year.

YANBU. And if more people were suspicious of family members and their dubious behaviour perhaps we could start to tackle some of these issues. The beaches were full of these men wandering around with very beautiful very young Thai 'girlfriends' when I was there. Truly awful.