To think a single man travelling to Thailand regularly is up to no good

[Katyazamo]

My uncle (who I am not particularly close to) travels to Thailand alone several times a year. He is in his mid 50s and has lived with my grandad since divorcing his wife around 20 years ago.
It's suddenly occurred to me that he's probably up to no good :/
AIBU?

I have a old school friend and an uncle who spent a lot of time in Thailand and surrounding areas. They both have a strong interest in buddhism, one is married to a Thai woman now and the other lives in the east.

Neither is a pedophile or user of prostitutes as far as I'm aware.

Lottery I've no idea if our system can prosecute for something that happened in Thailand, but for a start there'd have to be proof that a girl was underage and that would involve at least some cross country cooperation

I don't know if you've ever been, but the sort of places the girls work in don't strike me as the sort to ask for proof of age and keep careful records, far less work with a foreign agency, and I hardly imagine the girls themselves will volunteer the information. The language barrier, the cultural differences and the colossal corruption all help to make the whole thing pretty impenetrable

All of which no doubt attracts the sort of male who'd rather their preferences aren't too well known

I'm worried now that underage girls might be involved sad surely police could arrest men who do that when they come home?

highly unlikely underage are involved-people are saying this based on a newspaper report they read or on something they saw on tv. ive been to the notorious areas of bangkok and pattaya and not seen a single child openly available in the sex trade. it does happen sadly, but then it happens in every country but some people are painting a picture of old fat men walking around with children which is simply not true

if they did, if caught, they will suffer a miserable time in thai prison and again when they return home

gary glitter was imprisoned in the uk for crimes on his return home that took place in (i think) cambodia and thailand as well as in cambodia

Thailand's a massive place.......what area is he visiting ??

What about a lonely old lady wirh a a muffin top?

Yeah sharks,it's the thought of a mixed race relationship making me feel quesy.

You cant possibly be that naive or are you in the 'maybe he likes the food' camp as well.

araiwa it is widely known that anyone can buy themselves out of a Thai prison/conviction so it's simply not true that any person actually convicted of sex with a child would serve a long horrible term. That is the sad truth and why so many sex tourists feel invulnerable. But we are talking about a man using adult prostitutes. Still utterly reprehensible but not necessarily a paedophile.

I would go for sex, naughty 68 frustrated granny😍

I mentioned food along with beautiful beaches, stunning scenery, culture and cost of a holiday.

I didn't deny that there's a 'flourishing' sex trade in Thailand but I lived there for 4 years and saw plenty of innocent people return again and again.

It can cost significantly less that visiting the shittier islands of Greece or Spain for a week.

I have no idea what he was doing but I take exception because the two prejudices most people have shown are against Thailand and against middle-aged men. Both of which I'm uncomfortable with. It's racism and sexism in one neat little package of ignorance.

you would have to have quite a lot of cash to buy yourself out of a child sex crime. but agreed it is possible. same as a drug charge or anything

Sadly I would be a bit suspicious.

I travelled to Cuba 10 years ago on my own, totally niave it was also a sex tourism place. Had mothers try and sell me their sons! Not underage but sad and poignant none the less. I became pretty cynical of white older men that I met on their own, most were there to get sex workers. It all felt really wrong.

I've travelled to Thailand a lot over the last 20 years. I have friends that have a house there and it's a beautiful country but seeing the single men on their way out to buy prostituted women makes my skin crawl

maybe those men have friends that have a house there and it's a beautiful country ?

Yeah maybe.....

.....or maybe not.

Which is the more likely? What's down to what you want to believe isn't it.

It's quite eye opening how many people are keen to say he might just like the culture.

Yes perhaps, but the likeliest thing is he's going there for the prostitutes and they are most likely underage.

or he could be into Thai cookery

Maybe he wants a sex change and is looking into it over there? Maybe he's really into lady boys? Maybe he's seeking a Thai bride? Who cares? There could be tons of things he's doing and not all of them lead to sex with children.

I know a couple of men with Thai brides, they seem very happy. Couple of children, they all work, have freedom to go out as and when they please, money to spend etc. The men are actually decent men who have been messed around by British women because they're too nice/not all that attractive.

they are most likely underage

you are so completely and utterly wrong.

Yes, YABU. You are speculating about him when it's really none of your business and you are doing it on a public forum and it's certainly not any of our business.

Never been to Thailand. If it is prostitutes he lives near central London..surely prostitutes are available there?

Yes but you will pay London weighting and get London attitude.

Over in Thailand your money goes a lot further, so you are free to have a whole sex holiday with plentiful women making you feel like a king, rather than some sticky doorway transaction as a dirty old punter.

And, as the women are more desperate (In greater numbers and without the support network of even a benefits system) well....you can ask for whatever it is you like can't you? Because more than likely they'll say yes.

You only have to read those dire punter type websites to see the way they speak about the Thai and Filipino girls being so much more accommodating and feminine and submissive than us Western vipers.

Also Pattaya is full of the same kind of man, which means they convince each other that what they are doing is normal. And that of course, they are "supporting" these girls and women.

I know because my slimeball ex FIL lived there for 20 years "supporting" a woman 40 years his junior.

I love Bangkok and would travel there regularly if I could.

One moment there that is stuck in my mind. I was walking down a street and there was a western woman in a pretty sundress coming towards me. I was vaguely admiring the dress when I suddenly realized it wasn´t a woman, but a man with a wig and a dress on. He looked terrified that I was going to say something. Of course I said nothing, but his expression has stuck in my mind. I wondered if it was the first time he had dared to go out in a dress - something about him gave that impression. So I think that maybe your uncle has gone to Bangkok to dare to walk down the street as a woman?