to think what kids eat here is not really healthy?

[aeromint]

I am a live in au pair who entered this country just two months ago, taking care of a 8 year old boy for the past 6 weeks and his diet seems to be made of cornflakes, sausages, burger, string cheese and lunchmeat sandwiches.. aren't these, er, junk food?? That's what we would term them in my country. I really dislike making sausages every other evening to him, but this is what I have been instructed to do... Some of my friends also tell me that the kids in their homes eat mostly this kind of food...

How can this be healthy? I am honestly puzzled.

I grew up in a country where we followed this combination of foods for all three meals of the day - one carb item (usually rice or wheat based item), one or more vegetable medley (compulsory), a dip/sauce made from either a veggie or pulses and a fried item like shrimp or cassava crackers. And lots of seasonal fresh fruits, nuts and buttermilk throughout the day. Proper meat-based meals was usually on Sundays and special occasion / rituals day etc (about 1-2 times a month but it will be like a festival with too much of it) - so, a treat, not normal occurance. Basically, we had vegetables every single meal....

So... the only vegetable I see my kid (I use the word my very loosely) eat is carrots or potatoes smothered in ketchup (which is full of sugar?)... but he eats processed meat everyday, he packs a sandwich to his school and has cornflakes for breakfast... On weekends he has potato waffles or pancakes.... not sure what he eats for dinner, but his mum cooks a roast on sundays with potatoes and peas.. I am always invited to join them on sunday lunch and I love it but I miss the vegetables! Like broccoli, spinach, cauliflower, radish, asparagus...

Will AIBU to gently suggest her to include more veggies or should I just mind my own business?

(Sorry if the details here are a bit vague, I know my host mom is a member on this site, don't want to out myself...!)

I would just start making more beg for him, don't bother mentioning it. His diet sounds shit and though I think meat more than once a week isn't neccesarily that bad ( although I tend to stick to seafood/lean meat and quorn).
Many people in the UK have very different diets ... some eat badly.

I was a bit shocked at how badly/how often English babies and children eat when I arrived but you'll learn soon enough to not mention it :D

for goodness sake do not tell them you think it is unhealthy.. even though it is.

Well I cook healthy food with lots of vegetables from scratch every day for my child and he'll still only eat bread and bananas - what would you suggest?

You're an au pair in sole charge of a child from 7am-7pm?

Thank you for starting an MN food thread: they're always full of gold. It was brilliant from the very first reply.

Thank you for starting an MN food thread: they're always full of gold. It was brilliant from the very first reply.

It just all gets so ridiculously smug and competitive doesn't it - "well my little Horatio only eats organic spinach and kale rye-bread sandwiches - he simply won't touch chicken nuggets or pizza, I can't think why!"

That doesn't sound normal to me, my toddler just eats what we do and I certainly couldn't stomach sausages every night!

Could it also be that the parents work a lot and have fallen in to the trap of just feeding him what he likes to avoid long winded arguments after a long day at work/nursery/school?

I have found in my experience that the kids who have always eaten the same meal at the same time as the parents are much less fish then the kids who have separate meals.

I think that when kids eat with the parents they get a much wider variety of foods and see everyone else eating. They also know they eat what they are given.
The kids I know who eat seperately end up eating the same few foods as that's what the parents know they will eat and people don't want to spend an hour cooking for the kids and then an hour cooking for the grown ups so it's generally the kids who then get given the easy foods.

Hi OP,

I came to the UK as an Au Pair 10 years ago so I can see where you're coming from. I remember being shocked at certain cultural differences. Just as an example, in my country school children are encouraged to walk to school by themselves. Parents who take their kids to the school doors are seen as stifling their independence. You won't make a dramatic change and to confront your HM, no matter how gently, is more likely to make her defensive.

Also, you don't now how the parents ended up with this diet. Is it convenience. Or did your charge refuse all veg and getting him to eat peas is a huge advantage.

But the great thing about Au pairing is that both sides will learn from each other. I would speak to your HM and say that you would like to make yourself some salad and could you get the ingredients. Make some veggie dishes for yourself and eat it when dc has their lunch. Offer him some or just put a tiny amount on their plate. Don't push him to eat it (I know you'll want him to try) and don't comment on it. If he comments negatively just say that he doesn't have to eat it. Repeat every meal you're in charge of. If you're lucky you'll widen his palate without much aggro.

Btw have you ever spoken to your HP about the schedule. I bet they want to make your life easier.

I make a point of never saying my child dislikes a food, just because he doesn't eat it one day doesn't mean he won't eat it a different day, I also don't force him to eat or generally make a fuss over food.

He's an excellent eater who eats a varied healthy diet (although I will admit he loves cake best 😂)

This thread is making me so hungry.

Changing established food preferences is a slow process so agree with taking to supermarket, doing cooking activities outside of actual meal time and focussing on tasting other foods in very small amounts even if it's just a lick or a pea sized amount, regularly. Also agree that our growing obesity problem shows children and adults dietary habits are not all lovely healthy freshly cooked stuff

OP I have an au pair - she eats with our children Monday to Thursday as I don't get home till after 7. We feel it's important the DCs eat with an adult as good manners and good eating rub off on them.

I have asked her what she would like to eat / cook and she seems really happy with the sort of stuff I meal plan. But, if she wanted more of something, I would absolutely buy it for her! So you should definitely ask for more salad and veg. If you are eating it it could encourage the child to be more adventurous?

Re sole charge 7am to 7pm - presumably this child is at school so I wouldn't describe it as sole charge on here as people will be up in arms!

And finally you are BVU to assume the whole country feeds their children badly/lets the children dictate what they eat at all times. Use this opportunity as an Au Pair here to open your mind and not be judgemental of differences between your own upbringing and what we do here. Or you give the impression that you look down on us and that is never going to go down well.

Slightly off topic, I am very curious that your written English is very good and in and the way you write/speak is very much in line with someone whose first language is English. Finally, you have grasped MN speak remarkable quickly for someone who has only been here 2 months.

Are you really an Au Pair from a developing country?

Even I don't know what HM is.

English is taught from a young age in MOST developing countries, especially to children who are well-to-do enough to have an excellent diet. besides, the OP has made some subtle vocab mistakes that are straight out of a thesaurus.

I think she just does have excellent English

YANBU

I dunno, maybe she comes from a country that has English as a first language?

Chinese chicken and vegetable stir fry with noodles, I nearly fainted when my fussy eater son help prepare, cook and eat that. They'd been doing it at school first of all.

am very curious that your written English is very good and in and the way you write/speak is very much in line with someone whose first language is English. Finally, you have grasped MN speak remarkable quickly for someone who has only been here 2 months.Are you really an Au Pair from a developing country?

You realise she could be from a developing country could speak English as a first or from first speech language?

I'm guessing HM is host mother?

But I don't think anyone is under the illusion that the food described in the OP is healthy but, especially outside MN, there is lots of disinterest in healthy diets in preference to beige and chips and sugary drinks and snacks.

The prodigious fruit and veg consumption described on here is not typical of many UK DCs diets. You only have to look at the food sold in the average UK supermarket to confirm that.

ERM, As a linguist i would say that although the OP has impeccable English, I’d believe 100 percent that she is not a native speaker.

YANBU OP.

I think part of the problem in the UK is abundance. Children are fed all day every day, and they therefore have the luxury of refusing food. If they don't fancy what's out in front of them at dinnertime - they probably aren't all that hungry anyway, having just had a snack an hour or two beforehand. So they can afford to turn their noses up at the veggies they don't like the look of, or whatever.

Where and when I come from, when you sit down at the table to eat, you were hungry. So you were much more likely to try (and finish) what was there!

For all those who don't think the op's description applies to a lot of U.K. children

www.gov.uk/government/news/new-national-diet-and-nutrition-survey-shows-uk-population-is-eating-too-much-sugar-saturated-fat-and-salt