WIBU to tell DD she can no longer play the violin and has to pick something else? (She sounds fucking horrific!)

[hoppitybob]

Help. I'm absolutely hating it. Awful sound, it's screeching in my ear, even when she is taking a break!! She loves it, but my God, I can't take anymore.

Piano, guitar, etc. fine. I wish the violin was never on offer to her.

WIBU to say she can pick any other instrument she likes? It's been 9 months and it sounds the exact same, but that awful sound is just making a sort of tune...

If she's practising and having lessons she will eventually get past the strangled cat stage.
Send her to practice in her room and then ask her to come out when she has mastered her tune. Then try not to wince and applaud madly at what she has achieved.
Get her to practice bowing so she starts to make a nice noise on open strings.

In a few years you could be tapping your feet to some cracking tunes

If she's enjoying it and has a love for it I think you have to suck it up - and maybe get a sound proof room and/or ear plugs!

I assume she has a dreadful cheap instrument that's only tuned in lessons. I suggest you buy some nice (Dominant or Pirastro) strings - go to a real shop and get them properly changed, also the tail piece if it doesn't have fine tuners on - and download a tuning app for your phone. Make sure she applies rosin every time she plays and wipes it off with a duster after she's finished.

This won't stop her being shit but will reduce the strangled cat effect considerably

ooerrmissus as you have personal experience, are there any other instruments I should ban DD from? Forewarned is forearmed

We're (very) fortunate to live in a detached house - our neighbour's son has recently taken grade 1 violin, and we have been blissfully ignorant of his practice!

When I told my mum I was allowed to pick an instrument to learn in school she forbid me to bring home a violin.

I played woodwind and my dad made me practice in the garage.

Could be worse OP, she could be learning the bagpipes which I think sound bloody awful even when experts play them.

I steered my DD towards the flute mainly because I thought I could stand the sound of it (v. sensitive to noise). DD2 will also have to learn something that doesn't cause me pain but luckily violin wasn't on offer anyway!

My Dad bought champagne the day I gave up playing the viledin. I got to grade 6 and it still sounded bloody awful.

Sheepy probably best to avoid drums also.

We have very understanding neighbours

Three of ours played violin from age 4. It was a bit hard on the ear for a few years but no pain no gain.
Don't destroy her confidence and love of playing it gets better quickly enough. By the time they're onto full size it can sound more tuneful and when they move from a student instrument to a decent one it mellows.

Have you got a practice mute? They cut down the noise, though don't stop it completely.

Thank God both kids play guitar. As long as it's tuned, it's always acceptable

Get her to take up the cello. It sounds gorgeous even when played badly.

SpareChange my Dad made me do exactly the same when I was learning the saxophone. Sent me to the garage at the end of the driveway. He did bring me a cuppa though bless him.

Sorry OP YABU although I totally sympathise. I learned violin and saxophone and was truly terrible at both for a long time. Get yourself some fancy noise cancelling headphones and at least take a small amount of comfort that the violin doesn't reverberate like the saxophone does.

My dbro is now a music student at a highly respected college, and is regularly paid to play - he plays a brass instrument and was drafted into a band playing at an international competition because they were short of his instrument. He really is quite good. I mean really, really quite good.

However, I will not easily forget when he was fairly little, and decided to play a duet with his also musically talented grandad who had recently decided to take up the sax. They were theoretically playing the same tune, but in different keys because neither of them was able to transpose. It was genuinely appalling. The entire family found reasons to be in the kitchen, leaving in the end only my mum to suffer as the last woman sitting

Stick with it op, it might just be worth it in the end [passes over earplugs]

Yes to the practice mute. I swear that it, combined with practising in a room with a closed door, has saved our marriage (I'm grade 4 and yes, I sound terrible. But I love it and one day I will be better!).

Look to the long term. If she can play the violin well one day she can play in quartets and amateur orchestras always want violinists!

Flute gets horrendous later when you hit G7+ and start playing band and orchestral stuff which is always in the bat bothering register and takes lots of practice because the fingerings are no longer sensible. Then there's the little matter of the piccolo - only one of these beasties is required to cut through an entire symphony orchestra playing full volume.

Will be encouraging my DD down the strings/percussion route - orchestral woodwind slots are rare or the instrument required is crazy money!

Not mad on brass - prefer cat screeches to expiring ruminant!

Dh reckons that his elder sister was paid by their parents to stop playing the violin - she wasn't very good at it and they didn't like listening, she enjoyed playing so it was the only way they could get her to stop

Dh was never offered the opportunity to learn any musical instrument by his parents, although he did try to teach himself the guitar. He now adores music and is learning violin and piano

Ds plays the violin and was pretty good from the off. Starting with very very simple tunes obviously. I did still find the rehearsing quite annoying though.
I get him to have a good practice in his room and shut the downstairs door so I can't hear it. Then when he's done that he plays a few songs for me. I can tolerate it in short bursts.

I play the trombone and I am sure I never sounded like any kind of expiring animal

Dd played violin from the age of 5. Yes it sets the teeth on edge at first but I would never have asked her to give up! Some instruments might be easier to get a good sound from early but I think the rewards from sticking with a difficult instrument make it worth it.

Get her to take up the cello. It sounds gorgeous even when played badly.
But is significantly larger than a violin.
You will need to consider transporting you'll need to have a big car boot.
Also expensive to buy once they need their own.

Am feeling the pain. I play flute/picc, piano, euphonium/baritone, trumpet/cornet and various other windy/brassy things. Husband and DS also brassy. DD has come home with a violin. Oh joy!!

Was going to say the same as a pp - I only bought my dd a decent quality violin when she progressed to full size, but the difference was shocking and I wished I had done it sooner! Either that or get her an electric one, cos you can use it with headphones.

I do have to add, though, that it really is worth learning to tune it. I've decided, as a string phobic, to sort of learn alongside my DD. It may not last.

I genuinely don't understand. My ds has been learning violin for 6 months and it sounds gorgeous. Maybe hire a better quality instrument?