To say 'no, DH, you didn't 'do the washing'?

[CredulousThickos]

I freely admit our laundry pile is usually a disaster area. But last week I had a big push and got the bulk of it washed, dried and put away.

The remainder was sorted into two bags, one dark and one light, and I put Friday's work and school stuff in it in the evening.

Saturday morning I was lounging in bed and DH came up and made a big show of saying he was going to put the dark load on 'so he had all his work stuff ready'. There was ONE of his work t shirts in there as the rest had all been done.

Later that day I took the load out and hung it up.

Roll onto this morning and he comes downstairs with a flourish. Grabs his clean and dry work shirt and says 'oh it's no nice to be this organised, I'm really glad I put that wash on, I might start doing that every weekend'.

AIBU to think he's a thunderstealing cheeky fucker? All my effort clearly pales into significance because the Man of The House had put stuff in the machine and switched it on.

Grr.

Nice one @iklboo

DP stupidly once made a comment like that a few years ago; I have never washed any of his clothes since, unless expressed asked.

Give him credit he hasn't made the same mistake since.

I have a useless DH when it comes to washing, I've actually banned him from washing anything other than his own clothes after too many ruined items, esp bra's which are hard to find in my ginormous size. He's perfectly okay doing anything else in the house and has a responsible job so I think he just has a brain melt when it comes to laundry.

OP, you are completely justified in finding that unfair.

I'm quite lucky because DP does a lot of this stuff, but sometimes he takes a while to get round to hanging it up, or hangs it totally out of the sunlight.

As everyone else has agreed, putting on the dark wash (was that already sorted, hunted down from bedroom floors etc?) is the easy part that takes a couple of minutes.

I can say from exerience that it's sometimes more complex than "putting up" with such selective incompetents. ExH was one of those. We both worked full time and I had a job that could easily run into regular 60 hour weeks. I'd find myself doing everything so would ask him to wash up after dinner. The dishes were often still there the next day. We had a dishwasher, ffs. I had stern words with him and told him that I hated living in filth. I wasn't "naturally tidy" either but just got on with it, when I had the time and energy, could we please each have regular jobs to do. One of his was filling the dishwasher after dinner.

He decided after a week of this that we really needed a cleaner. We ended up paying £40 a week for a cleaner who spent half his time dealing with the fucking washing up

And, yes, he expected a pat on the back every time he lifted a finger. Wanker.

DH does far more than ex ever did and I don't even work outside the home any more. Admittedly, he's a bit crap at washing up and he's confessed to being intimidated by the laundry (we have a regular mountain and the washer is witchcraft, somehow) but he still irons his own stuff and some of the kids' and isn't afraid to pick up a duster.

I think a lot of the difference is that Ex grew up with a martyred mother but DH's mum has always been domestically inept, to put it kindly. Neither got taught how to clean a house and do laundry by their parents but DH recognises that it's not the job of fairies and that not doing it has pretty dire results.

Yes, I have a DH like this. Incredibly useful at many things, but completely oblivious to other things that do need doing. Puts the washing out if I'm out to 'help'. But doesn't put another load on or get the original one in from the line if its raining. Grr.

Incredibly useful at many things, but completely oblivious to other things that do need doing.

Other things that somehow fall to you to do you mean ?