To ask for your honest view or direct experience?

[Wishful25]

I'm nearly 40. Married and potentially would like a 3rd child. Worried about age though! I feel young and would love another, but realistically how will I feel / how will it be for the child when the child begins school and I'm 43/44? Perhaps I'm worrying unnecessarily - I just don't know whether to be thankful for what I have and leave it there or go for a wanted third! Thanks.

Icequeen your response is wonderful - thank you! Yes I think I'm definitely overthinking it!

this may depend on the age of the child's peers' parents.

seriously? I don't remember ever once the age of a peers parents crossing my mind ever.

Ronny...as I've said to whoop, they simply don't know me.

Quite offensive sweeping generalisations all the same Tabby

I had my youngest at 39 op, I've loved being an older mum, can't speak for my kids and how they feel, but all they need is a good mum, not a young one surely? < narrows eyes at kids>

I was going to make a similar point to Sleepfree Go for it if you want but be aware that it could be a difficult journey.

MrsJoy....you are showing your true colours too now aren't you.

Ah you're just hilarious. Go back to bed you lunatic.

You're a hoot Tabby you just can't see yourself can you? It's becoming quite fun to watch, please carry on.

I'm 44 and my only DC started school this week and I can assure you I felt fine until I read this thread and began to feel like other parents might be looking at me and seeing an old fart.

Cheers for that.

feral I don't honestly think most parents even consider the age of the other parents on the playground. It simply doesn't feature to well-rounded individuals.

Glad it helped Wishful 😀 I also wanted to put (but thought it looked a bit big headed) that during a recent holiday we hired our own boat which had a doughnut which could be towed, at speed, behind it. My DS17 managed about 2 mins ibut I managed to stay on for a good 10 minutes and went so fast I nearly overtook the boat! See, I can still show those youngsters a thing or too 😀

Actually I'm kidding there - a few mums are around the same age and a couple much older. It's normal and if it weren't I don't much care.

I'm also almost 40 and have 2 dc, aged 6 and 14.

My dp had the snip after dd and we felt that was the right decision for us.

We have had the odd conversation since then about whether or not it was the right thing to do, however, we haven't room for another and couldn't afford another so that's made our decision easier.

I would feel old being pregnant now but that's just me.
Lots of my old school friends are just starting out but I don't envy them.

In contrast, the women I know who had dc really young are now approaching 40 and are looking forward to holidays alone and dc going to university.

There is absolutely no right or wrong answer here. You do what's best for you and your family and sod what anyone else thinks.

Tabby that was rude as fuck.

I had a Mum who had me in her mid-forties when it was all about accidents due to lack of proper contraception and definitely not as trendy as it is now ... I hated it and I still hate it. There was no more disposable income, just tired parents and the later burden of care.

I hope people don't find this offensive, but the OP did ask for honest views (admittedly of parents, not the children).

feral I can't speak for everyone unlike some but I promise you, all I ever see on the school run is Mums. I don't see their age, it's not like there are flashing signs , I don't see how much money they earn, I don't see whether they're single/married/divorced. Just mums. 99% of whom are trying their best for their children and love them beyond words. Nothing else matters

Fuck i a, pregnant and 41 and kids go to school here at 5/6 so just realized I will be 46/7 at the school gate
Better have my simmer frame ready

*Zimmer

I was a few weeks short of my 39th birthday when I had my DS. He has two older siblings - one was already in senior school and the second went the same year DS started in Reception.

I was definitely more relaxed about the pregnancy and the birth and it certainly helped that my other two were independent and pitched in where they could so family life seemed smoother. It seemed that every maternity appointment began with the words "At your age..."

DS is now in his final year at primary school. I'm fairly certain that I'm the oldest mother on the playground but probably only by a year or two and I don't have any trouble striking up conversations with the mothers of his friends - regardless of their age they are all nice even if they have swishier hair and nicer eyebrows than me

SleepFree

Careful Forever Tabby doesn't like the swearz

I am 58 with a 13 year old.....so far so good and I am not the oldest mum in my sons year (just)
He has no complaints and I ask him.

One of my ds's old school friends had a mum who was 26 when they started secondary school! Now that made me feel old