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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Just say what you mean!

64 replies

Maryof1993 · 08/09/2017 13:48

I work shifts. So if DP wants to go out, he will need to know what I'm working. Simple.
So, I get asked 'what are you doing at the end of September?'.
So, I respond 'What do you mean? On the 30th?'
'No, on the 29th'
Why can't he just ask what I am working on the 29th? Why does it have to be a difficult extraction of information so I can be asked the correct question for him to receive the correct information that he needs to know?

OP posts:
FallingOrbit · 08/09/2017 14:36

It doesn't sound like a particularly "difficult extraction of information" - he asked a fairly loose question, you asked him to be more specific and he was. What's the problem? It's very annoying when people repeatedly don't answer direct questions but your example is a million miles from that.

SheldonsSpot · 08/09/2017 14:43

Do you work a different shift every single day?

Original poster
Maryof1993 · 08/09/2017 18:42

Do you work a different shift every single day?

Yes. That's what shift work is

OP posts:
Nikephorus · 08/09/2017 18:49

Yes. That's what shift work is
Not necessarily actually - my ex used to work a 3-shift pattern - early, days & nights. The hours on each section were the same.
Being sarky after 2 replies doesn't endear you to other posters.

FallingOrbit · 08/09/2017 19:26

Being sarky after 2 replies doesn't endear you to other posters

Seconded. Especially as OP has chosen to ignore my well reasoned reply.

DrHorribletookmycherry · 08/09/2017 19:27

I'd suggest a shared calendar physical or electronic. You can both easily check for work shifts or family plans.

EZA15 · 08/09/2017 20:16

Based on your sarcy post I feel sorry for your oh tbh. You seem to get pissed off very easily and as a pp stated, shift work doesn't necessarily mean a different shift each week; at my work it's a week of earlies, mids and lates

hasitcometothis33 · 08/09/2017 20:28

Your DP needs to LTB OP

Sisinisawa · 08/09/2017 20:29

Yanbu
My DH is like this. I usually end up saying "what exactly are you asking?" And telling him to be specific. It's very irritating.

gamerchick · 08/09/2017 20:31

I hear you OP that kind of shit gets right on my tit ends. Be fucking specific!

Mrsfluff · 08/09/2017 20:32

Op, I'm with you on this - if he needs to know a specific date, why doesn't he just ask that!?! I imagine if gets quite wearing if he does it frequently.

kaytee87 · 08/09/2017 20:32

You seem angry about not very much op

MadMags · 08/09/2017 20:33

Oh dear.

gamerchick · 08/09/2017 20:41

Don't worry about it OP, I came to the conclusion earlier that a fair chunk of mumsnet wipe their blokes arses. It wasn't pretty Wink

ChicRock · 08/09/2017 20:43

Yes. That's what shift work is

Nope. Not always.

My DH works a week of earlies, week of lates, week of nights.

But anyway, great example of how it's your way or no way.

If you're as arsey with your DH as you have been on here, then I feel sorry for the fella.

SheldonsSpot · 08/09/2017 20:47

Yes. That's what shift work is

Erm, not necessarily. Confused But pardon me for asking, I was actually genuinely asking, not being a snarky twat, unlike your response.

WhenSheWasBadSheWasHorrid · 08/09/2017 20:50

I know what you mean op. Dh often asks questions in a very round about fashion.
I just wish he would get the the bloody point. He's one of life's gaffers though and I just have to accept he's not going to change.

Urubu · 08/09/2017 23:52

Ah YANBU, DH is like this as well.

hasitcometothis33 · 08/09/2017 23:55

Hugs for all the highly strung girlfriends

Original poster
Maryof1993 · 09/09/2017 00:08

Being sarky after 2 replies doesn't endear you to other posters.
I wasn't being sarky. Shift work means different shifts. If I was doing the same hours every day it wouldn't be shift work.

OP posts:
Original poster
Maryof1993 · 09/09/2017 00:10

It doesn't sound like a particularly "difficult extraction of information" - he asked a fairly loose question, you asked him to be more specific and he was. What's the problem?
It was difficult. He wanted to know what I was working on a particular day. He didn't ask what I was working on that particular day. He asked a vague question that could not have had a specific answer.

OP posts:
Nanny0gg · 09/09/2017 00:10

It would be if you were doing the same hours every day for a week.

hasitcometothis33 · 09/09/2017 00:11

lol

Fleshy · 09/09/2017 00:13

Oh well. Never mind.

Guavaf1sh · 09/09/2017 00:21

If you class that as a 'difficult extraction of information' count yourself very lucky