to ask you to help with my office battle?

[CopperHandle]

Bloke and I at work having A Dispute over a fiver.
He believes that the fiver is mine, I believe that it is his.
Cue the Fiver War of 2017.

So far he has hidden the fiver between the keys of my keyboard, in my office trainers (kept under my desk) and tucked in the grid cover of my desk fan.

I have stuck it under his mouse (covering the sensor) and taped it HEAVILY with washi tape (brightly coloured masking tape) to his desk.

Fiver is currently on my desk.

I need HELP, please lovely Mumsnetters - I am very competitive in need of a win this week

Buy him coffee with the fiver?

Inside his sandwich in the office fridge.

Draw a fake one, attach that to his desk and donate the real one to the nearest charity box??

Set it into some jelly and leave it on a plate on his desk.

Taped over the mouthpiece of his deskphone?

Cling film it onto his car. Coveribg the entire car just incase.

Ye love each other!

Hidden in his coffee cup?

Put it in jelly? Or is that only for staplers.

Photocopy the fiver, turn into bunting and decorate his work space.

MaxPepsi That'll be the grade finale I think, I like that idea.

NapQueen Good plan, I'll engage this one though that's an overnight job.

domesticgoddesshaha YES. I know which one is his lunchbox, that'll be the 11.30 plan.

DewDropsonKittens Not dissimilar to how the dispute began in the first place! though it was chilli sauce, not coffee

Somanyshoes For some reason, he doesn't have a desk phone (I do).

Napqueen wins! Set it in jelly indeed!
And come on, what's the backstory here?

Give it to his favourite charity - that'll fix him!

Staple it to his seat?

Or post it through his work locker.

NapQueen You're coming up with some excellent medium term plans here. I REALLY want to cling film it to the car, unfortunately his car is in the garage today. Also, I'm not 100% which one is his so that could go south really fast.

senua Possibly. I mean they are waterproof now.

Timeforabiscuit Loving this. Definitely on the list.

3luckystars ...no comment

3lucky totes.

Donate it to a charity that he wouldn't approve off - i.e. Dogs trust if he hates dogs, Tory MPs benevelant fund if he's a labour man etc

Gently stick it to his back when he's not looking.

Blow up a baloon, fill the baloon with confetti abd glitter and shove the fiver in and knot it. Tie the baloon to his chair.

Blow up a baloon, fill the baloon with confetti abd glitter and shove the fiver in and knot it. Tie the baloon to his chair.

YES. I will pick up balloons at lunchtime!

God my typing! Sorry.

Have someone call his phone having kidnapped said fiver.
Open negotiations

Mount the fiver in a picture frame with a Photoshop of whatever is comically appropriate to office conversation.

I once photoshopped the england rugby squad with the many stylings of Eddie Izzard, twas a beautiful thing.

Totally nicking the balloon idea

Op we're going to need pictures of these maneuvers as they occur today!