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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Not to give DC a snack on way home from school?

289 replies

chainedtothedesk · 06/09/2017 03:53

Quite happy to let them snack once we are home but my DD (9) has asked that I arrive at school gates to collect her with a snack. She's noticed other parents arrive with a snack and says she's hungry too at the end of the school day (often doesn't eat the fruit I give her for morning break though!) And doesnt want to wait the 15-20 min it takes to get her home. I suspect hunger doesn't come into it , she's just hoping she is more likely to get a bag of crisps or similar, rather than toast, if they eat on the way home rather than once we get there.
Today we saw a family eating a chocolate bar and small pother of Pringles on the way home which prompted the question (though not for the first time)
AIBU to make my DC just wait a little until they get home and suggest that they have something a bit healthier than chocolate and crisps?

OP posts:
Gunpowder · 06/09/2017 07:42

I didn't mean you are mean btw OP! If she used to going without and just wants one because her friends do of course YANBU. I just don't get the whole 'people never snacked 30 years ago, it's why so many DC are obese now' argument.

Gunpowder · 06/09/2017 07:43

*is used

Holidayhooray · 06/09/2017 07:43

But why OP?

Your daughter has asked for her snack to be brought to school. Not a different snack.

Why not do this for her? Surely no skin off your nose?

kateandme · 06/09/2017 07:45

many of my mates after school had crips(space pickled onions ones of old) or had a choc bar,some every day.most now are the happiest healthiest people I no.yes there is the exception...and those that went home and had crap after crap food.but not most.why because we weret judging.being mean.making food good or bad or punishment on them as humans.were eating more balanced I nthe home and cooking good meal together or just learn food wasn't bad.so we didn't want choc all the time and chose to feed our bodies well.becasue wwe wanted to lok after ourselves.and nourish.food has become something so dam warped.

Oblomov17 · 06/09/2017 07:48

Nearly all kids/ a lot of them, have a snack at the end of school. I was shocked by this. I really think I ought to start taking something for Ds2.

Pizzaexpressreview · 06/09/2017 07:49

We're only 15-20 min walk to home and when we get in we have an "afterschool snack" sat at the table. Could be carrot sticks and hummus or could be crumpets or a treat.

I much prefer us sitting at a table and wouldn't bring a snack to walk along with as if what to sit down!! They can run home and jump around etc.

I do find all this bringing snacks to school really bizarre . I see some reception parents with snacks when they're just driving home but not really seen it with the older years. Certainly didn't happen when I was a kid!

The only time we'd take something would be if theyve had afterschool sports and I was picking up to drive somewhere else so wouldn't get a home snack.

Original poster
chainedtothedesk · 06/09/2017 07:49

Because I don't think having to wait until she gets home is a bad idea. She can sit, eat, have a drink. What's wrong with that? I don't think I need another thing to remember to do /bring especially when I am back at work and not coming straight from home. If she's not eaten the fruit from earlier in the day then she can't be that hungry?

OP posts:
StickThatInYourPipe · 06/09/2017 07:50

Feeding a hungry kid cucumber and carrot sticks is just middle class cruelty

What are you talking about? Carrot sticks are lovely!

Pizzaexpressreview · 06/09/2017 07:52

Wow it must be more normal in other arwas. I can see how it could be easier to fall inton a pressure to do it if it becomes a norm. I'm glad we don't! I find it all really strange and much prefer sitting at a table as a family.

Rebecs · 06/09/2017 07:52

I've been a bit relaxed this first week back with snacks after school - but I've told them next week it's back to the usual fruit snack as we walk home. And that's the only reason I give them a snack really. if I was just putting them in the car and driving home they could wait. But a little healthy snack gives them a boost (last year one daughter was going into lunch at 11.45) to walk the 15-20 mins walk home.

Holidayhooray · 06/09/2017 07:52

Just seems to me such a trivial thing to dig your heals in about.

Your daughter is so young, there will be so much big stuff on the horizon. For the sma stuff, like obliging a request for a snack at school rather than home, I'd be inclined to agree.

It's the little things sometimes that actually mean a lot to a child.

Pizzaexpressreview · 06/09/2017 07:54

I do lots of "little things" for mine. Luckily they will walk 15-20mins home and then they love that I sit with them and listen to them talk about school at a table with a snack on it!! You see it's the little things ;)

Holidayhooray · 06/09/2017 07:56

Pizza you have missed my point entirely

Have your children asked for their snack to be brought to school?

That's the point.

MollyHuaCha · 06/09/2017 07:56

Unless diabetic or something, they can wait till they get home. I'm not keen on seeing people eat as they walk.

My DCs are older now, but I remember the mother in reception who used to present her child with a chocolate bar in the playground each day at 3.30. You could hear the other pupils commenting and asking their parent to bring one daily too.

Natsku · 06/09/2017 07:58

If I pick DD up I usually take a piece of fruit to eat on the way home as its a half hour walk but she usually walks by herself so has nothing (or picks some berries on the way home!). 15/20 minutes is definitely not too long to wait for a snack.

hugodarling05 · 06/09/2017 08:00

We do a quick snack (not Pringles!) at pick-up so they're actually hungry for dinner! We eat early though, about 5:30/5:45.

barefootinkitchen · 06/09/2017 08:00

If there's still fruit left in the lunch bag I would offer that so as not to waste it. They can get really hungry at the end if the day. I know I ignore my hungry feelings then realise I haven't eaten for hours and feel a bit weak. I think it's good to get some calories when you feel hungry if you can.

ShovingLeopard · 06/09/2017 08:01

Carrot sticks and cucumber are in no way filling on their own, and will do nothing to raise blood sugar (and mood, concentration, alertness, etc).

Most kids are starving after school, and have burnt through their lunch. I don't get the judginess about snacking, providing the snacks are reasonably healthy and balanced (I.e. some protein and fat with the carbs/veg to balance flood sugar). IRL I find those who are judgy about this are usually nott very well tuned in to how blood sugar levels affect mood and functioning/behaviour - either in themselves, or their offspring.

Pizzaexpressreview · 06/09/2017 08:01

They asked in reception when they saw others having it . I think its just habit . I would remind them we'd have something when we get home and it's only 15-20mins and they soon get used to that!

We do tend to do things just because everyone else does and I think it's far nicer to have the ritual of chatting at home at the table than eating walking along.

I imagine it would be much harder to change if that's what they've always done though!!

Molly - I think that's it . Someone or a few do it and the others see it and want it. Completely agree with you though that for most people they can wait til they get home and sit down properly! It's such a bizarre thing to me.

coddiwomple · 06/09/2017 08:02

Do what you want. I always had a snack when someone was picking me up from school as long as I can remember, and I bring a snack for my kids too. Big deal, it doesn't have to be a bag of crisps, they are just hungry and it won't kill them to have an apple, a banana or a pack of biscuits.

We rarely come home directly after school, many afternoons we stop at the local park where they burn a bit of energy for 30mn to an hour, or they go to their next activity. Diner is rarely before 6:30pm at the earliest (and that's honestly a struggle to be prepared so early)

Do what works best for you! I couldn't care less if people judge if the see mine having the odd pastry after school, they have no idea what they do after or what their diet is.

Pizzaexpressreview · 06/09/2017 08:03

I'm not judgy of others that do it irl I just wouldn't do it!

I don't see a problem with an afterschool snack I just don't see the need to have it on the walk home.

Pizzaexpressreview · 06/09/2017 08:04

If we were going or the park I would take a snack to have at the park! I guess we all just do it differently.

Crunchymum · 06/09/2017 08:04

We had a bit of trouble settling in early last year and the preschool teacher told me to pack a treat in DS bag and if she deemed he had a good day then he could have his treat Shock

Teacher herself is a very fit yoga 5 times a week vegan (for context) so I was surprised by the "treat" suggestion. We didn't use it.

We have something like half a peanut butter sandwich (brown bread) and a glass of milk when we get home. Or cheese and a few crackers.

Xoticdreamz · 06/09/2017 08:04

I always take a snack and sometimes a drink to meet my son from school. Not a particularly unhealthy one just what he would have after the 25 minute walk home. It's not something he asked me to do but I can remember always feeling really hungry after school finished.
It's really not a big deal I think and her watching lots of other kids having something will be making her even more hungry.
Does she not like the type of fruit you put in?
For some reason in my house grapes, blueberries , raspberrys are eaten quickly apples oranges and bananas not so keen on.

Holidayhooray · 06/09/2017 08:06

There's no need whatsoever

I suppose my view is that your DD has asked for it and I can't see the big deal to saying yes. I save my "no"s for stuff that I really do think "no" about.