To be fed up of Instamums 2

[Hmmmmx100]

Continued from original post...

I've followed MoD for ages. I really like her, and FoD too. Good for them that they're making a really good income from the book/blog/instagram.

LibbyLou- it's not about not liking MOD or FOD. See the post above from Waitinforaflamin - these threads have largely been focused on the lack of transparency on their posts. I think almost anyone in MOD/FOD's position would accept a freebie £7k luxury holiday. All we're asking is that they stop being so secretive and shady about whether they paid for the holiday or not, and whether that impacts on their ability to be impartial (e.g. Because they are contractually obliged to post X number of pictures with positive captions about the accommodation and facilities). It seems as if lots of insta families are getting into murky arrangements where they aren't being paid to advertise anything (and don't need to specify #ad), but they have got the product or holiday for free, but on the understanding that they must say positive things about it (even if it transpires that they don't actually value the product). All seems very disingenuous.

MoD and FoD are the worst ones (but not the only ones) for misleading their followers about the nature of their reviews. MoD's bullying of anyone who dares to disagree with her is disgraceful too.

I am pleased to see that MoD has taken some of the suggestions from these threads on board. Its a shame that FoD has thrown a mini-tantrum when somebody asked a perfectly reasonable question about the nature of one of his reviews.

If MoD continues to bring her feed back around to what made her popular in the first place, it may end up saving her social media career in the long term. This onslaught of advertising would have ended up leading to her downfall eventually. FoD should take note.

Stealth advertising is something that really annoys me. Its something which occurs throughout various medias, but that doesn't make it ok for instagrammers to jump on board with it and make an already bad situation much worse.

"I think almost anyone in MOD/FOD's position would accept a freebie £7k luxury holiday."

This is what saddens me, that most people would do this. I accept that I'm in a minority of one, but I wouldn't make my kids work (and I really do believe it is work). They are constantly filmed and photographed but because it's Instagram it's ok? Seems shit to me. at least in traditional media there are regulations protecting children.

Instagram seems full of unquestioning/adoring women without an ounce of questioning/critical analysis or thought. It's really weird. Is it because most women following such accounts as discussed on here hope that some of the Insta Fame Fairy Dust will run off on them? All a lot seem to want is attention and free stuff.

If there's an account of a mother who is primarily about family life without selling out her children (or invading their privacy) and who rejects rampant consumerism please share!

I don't know what an instamum was before mumsnet. After the last thread I've had a quick look and I've no intention of following any of them ever. However, if they're going to post their family life all over social media, they need to grow thicker skins and understand they are going to be talked about, not always positively. What the hell did they expect?
And for what it's worth, #blessed makes me want to vomit into a bin.

I think they ought to expect constructive criticism, yes. It's what the rest of us chumps have to put up with at work after all

I don't think it's all been constructive though or terribly respectful tbh.

The forensic take down of this MOD is quite something to view as a total neutral. (I don't follow her, I don't even have a family but I do like social media and I was following an instamum who've I've now swapped out for another one).

I’ve finally read the full thread (wowww! That was long!). I heard about it through Instagram but I haven’t - and won’t - read the DM article.

The debate is probably over now, it has said everything it needed to (apart from the child sharing issue, which is separate), but I am sort of an Instamum (ugh, that term) so I want to comment. It would have been more relevant, probably, if I’d done so days ago.

I follow two or three of the accounts mentioned here, and know of the rest.

Most of the animosity on the thread seems to be about the grey area of “gifting”. When I first started IG as a business, I gifted. Not to MOD, but to another of the very popular IG’ers who has been mentioned a lot on this thread

I feel a bit differently about gifting now. Firstly, as a business, it didn’t work so I don’t do it anymore. And secondly, as a consumer, it’s too transparent. Some lives that looked attainable when I first joined instagram are a little more constructed and propped up by freebies than I realised.

But those “freebies" are a reward for being a taste-maker who is willing to share, though. Like a PP, I prefer using Instagram to gain inspiration, rather than magazines. I tend to follow accounts who, even if they didn’t pay for it, probably would as it matches their existing taste (and lots of things popular IG'ers share didn't come for free). As soon as I start to find an account unrelatable, I move onto the next one. That’s how it goes: popular one day, not so much the next.

I follow fashion bloggers who have vaguely my shape, and parenting accounts who share my taste or who I find hilarous (thanks, Mother Pukka ). I love instagram because - thank God I’m not being dictated to by celebrity stylists and 22-year-olds on fashion desks at magazines anymore.

The App has been around for a few years now, and all areas of interest have their own circle of popular accounts, so we’re probably all just starting to lift the curtain up and see how it works.

As someone who owns a business and uses Instagram as its sole marketing, getting IG “right" is much, MUCH harder work than it looks. So those who are able to make it work as a business aren’t just fannying about and snapping the odd iPhone pic and pressing “share”, believe me.

Also bloody love Mumsnet, even though the Instagram mentions of this post are mainly against it. Why?! I mean, the AIBU board aside

But I say: go for it, Instamums (bleurg, that word!).

(On the secondary, undiscussed subject of sharing images of children: Me and Orla wrote a great blog post about that, which pretty much sums it all up.)

(Also agree, Dolores - interesting issues raised on the thread but it has also gone to disrespectful and quite spiteful places. But that's Aibu for you... expecting to be flamed for saying that)

Absolutely no reason to bring wage into it. That has no realivence to the subject at hand. I love Instagram and follow lots of mum accounts. I fell in love with a few accounts that are now all about the sponsored posts one in practically is full of sponsored posts and promoting the free stuff she gets sent. she uses her kids to promote things that is quite obviously some thing that she would never buy as she spends the rest of the time making sure everyone can see how loaded they are as a family. I used to love her account and seeing her two blonde curly haired boys growing up but now it’s just all about bosting about what she’s been sent oh and her hair story’s are so cringe. I get that people are enjoying making some money but she uses her kids and puts her kids in danger by doing this. Is making money for a silly deodorant ad worth it.

Wage is relevant because if ur blagging gear (cringe) or not declaring freebies as adverts, its normal to ask 'surely you dont have to beg for a washing machine and buy one like every1 else'

if u dont understand this, ur dim

I think insragram looks exhausting. All those perfect pictures of immaculate houes with tea light holders, flowers and bunting. I wonder if those mums have a deaw filled with junk like i do!
I dont think my life is aesthetic enough for insta.... looks bloody hard work keeping up the pretence and more than a bit fake.
Although i could be persuaded to get the marigolds on if the is money in it!

Houses sorry!

Drawer sorry... aaggggrrr!

If there's an account of a mother who is primarily about family life without selling out her children (or invading their privacy) and who rejects rampant consumerism please share!

I like to follow these mums on Instagram... their families feature heavily, as well as interiors, art, lifestyle etc. But it's not commercialised or in your face at all

instagram.com/peonyandpraxis

instagram.com/emilyhogarth

instagram.com/feather_and_moss

instagram.com/littledollydaydream

instagram.com/victoriaropercurzon

instagram.com/travel.little.one

instagram.com/nicola_shelton_art

instagram.com/williamskate79

MNHQ please delete if I'm not allowed to link account names

Oh thank you Absofrigginlootly - I just clicked on littledollydaydream randomly from your list and her account is just what I was looking for! Authentic, lovely and normal! Minimal selfies and no (from what I saw) stupid, narcisstic stories prattling on about utter crap.

Like a breath of fresh air.

It's pretty important for instamums (or instaanyones) to have another source of income I think. As advertising needs to be really thought through and used sparingly, if they're going to retain the trust of their followers. Because trust is their greatest asset- once that's gone their social media 'career' is done.

Chunkyficken you're welcome! I love following beautiful Instagram accounts - I'm very aesthetically driven, but they have to inspire me!

Peony and praxis is probably my fav - her house is just lovely!! (Not a self promotion I promise - I live in the states!)

Alison Sadler is another who is worth checking out. She has a shop and there is some cross over with her business BUT she's positive and does a #freeupmyinsta call every few months. Love her and her outlook.

I disagree. It's an important discussion - the social media marketing agencies like Gleam, Social Chain etc have a big role to play here. Not just in getting instamums 'deals' with brands so the agencies can get a nice commission (primary raison d'etre of course), but also to act as consultants who will advise when they need to stop oversharing and overselling, and have a bit more integrity and yes, community spirit would be very nice to see. It's a new industry, and I know that some of these agencies are staffed by a load of 24 year olds who havent grasped the consultancy bit yet. MN-ers feedback is absolutely vital.

wouldyoulike where can we find your blog post that you mention? TIA!

Jjpeston excellent point. These social media agencies are staffed by people (generally) very far away from the target audience. Working in marketing, free feedback like this is a gift and so hard to come by.

I do think MoD has been given good advice to pare it back to her midwifery. Something we all can relate to and that make her an Insta star in the first place.

Yes, agree on MoD - when on the subject of midwifery she is clearly wonderful, empathetic and knowledgeable. And god knows the NHS needs more positive advocates like her! But, her constant 'instaselling' is ruining that integrity. Huge naivety on her part, and not a little greed (sorry to say) which is at odds with NHS job.

Chunkyficken I meant to add this mum to the list too

instagram.com/justordinaryfolk

it's concerning to hear of some instamums bullying people off insta. I don't like that at all. AT ALL.

These two threads have achieved something. Just watched a few insta stories this morning, and even people who haven't referenced the MN thread at all over the last few days, are now saying "this was a freebie/gift", "I paid for this product myself, this isn't an ad OR a freebie". I feel so relieved that this has happened. Keep it up please insta stars. This isn't pointless information for your followers- we want to hear it each and every time you mention a product please.

Totally agree with @leeelee - if these instagrammers want to maintain the trust of their followers, they must be more selective and much more transparent with what they advertise. Was also delighted to see MOD revert to her old self for a couple of days.

Well done everyone for what this has achieved and will continue to achieve.