Teenage party bouncing

[Dollyparton3]

Sooooo, two friends of ours recently separated and are currently waging the war to be the most popular parent with their only child. So far this has involved an extortionate level of spending, running around, lavish holidays etc.

Now they've decided to throw her a sweet 16 bash (thanks for that, we told ours that it wasn't a thing a couple of months back when it was her turn). This includes village hall hire, a DJ, will undoubtedly have her arriving in a gold carriage pulled by unicorns.

So far there are 60 teens invited. We (a mutual bunch of friends who are all parents) have been told on whatsapp this morning that we're being called upon to bounce this event and make sure it doesn't get out of control. Some of the parents on that list won't even have teens attending. It has been assumed from the word go that our help will be unlimited.

AIBU to say "not my circus, not my monkeys" or am I being a bit mean in thinking that someone else's wild ambition to throw a trouble free 16 year old party when they can't even sort their own divorce out is bonkers?

Totally bizarre and you WNBU to say no, I would want to too although I know I would end up doing it anyway

YANBU. Cheeky bastards. Message back and tell them your hourly fee for security services provided will be £50.

Fuck that, no way!

Nope! Just say you're not available on those dates. Can't believe some people!

Wtf? Tell them no. YANBU at all and they are cheeky bastards.

Yup, I would text them your hourly bouncing rates.

You dont assume things like this, these peopel are simply mad.

Not that I advocate you actually doing this for the cheeky fuckers.

However should you wish to accommodate their ridiculous request I'd double check you actually can?
My ex husband did a lot of actual security work and it's a regulated industry.
Also if shit goes down, someone gets injured or whatever, who is liable?

It'd be a big fat no from me!

good point Gunsandbanjos. I'm pretty sure the biggest troublemaker will be alcohol, pretty sure that if anything bad does happen, both disney parents will be presuming that some of the more "practically minded" parents will sort it out. That sounds harsh but I just have a feeling that in a crisis, they'd be the last ones i'd want to be going to for suggestions.

Book yourselves a table at a lovely restaurant for that date, drop your DD off and drive away as they kiss their deposit goodbye

so not your circus

Not heard the saying before, but love it!

I would just reply that you aren't available. Don't need to apologise or tell them what you are doing.
Doesn't matter what they are asking you to do, nobody should assume anyone is going to help with anything until they have checked.

60 teens, invited at least 120 will attend.
Stay out of the way.

If they are incapable of ensuring the safety and security of those invited, they shouldn't be having the party.

Basically, they want someone else to be the 'bad guys' who do the disciplining so they can carry on both being the 'cool parents' who let them do whatever they like. Tbh I'd be a bit concerned about sending a kid to a birthday party where they anticipate the need for bouncers!

Ps one of my neighbours did this for a 14 year old. It got onto Facebook and dozens of gatecrashers turned up.
Mother locked herself in her bedroom while dozens of children got drunk, staggering down the street and vomiting in the gutter. A lot of cars parked locally got keyed.
It was horrible.

You need a hastily arranged pub night out for all the potential bouncers, then none of you will be available and Mr and Mrs HeadInTheClouds will have to have a rethink. It's going to be carnage - stay far away

I'd just say that we already have plans.

Agree with the other posters I would also think hard about letting my 16 yr old go to the party actually.

YY they are cheeky to ask and to assume but if you think the parents are incapable of managing the party, are you still going to let your DC attend? If my hypothetical teen was attending and I though the supervision would be rubbish, then I wouldn't mind staying. Otherwise I wouldn't let my hypothetical teen go.

Some of the parents on that list won't even have teens attending.

wtf! This is the epitome of circus/monkeys.

I covered a sweet 16th party in a venue I worked at as a door supervisor, we were told in the brief it was a dry bar and only kids with bands were able to come in.

As it was only 50-60 teens tops it was decided that myself and one other ds would be required.

I was searching bags and confiscating alcohol until i was called to look after a female who had collapsed and I had to ask a parent to continue searching bags (which she didn't do).

The mother of the birthday child was up in the main road selling bands willy nilly to random teens which meant there was about 200 + people in the venue, meanwhile back in the venue a group of teen boys had jumped the bar are were stealing the spirits and other alcohol, the shift manager got up and told everyone the party was over and to vacate the premises which instilled a mini riot and the police had to attend.

Because birthday snowflakes party had been ruined by all this she demanded a complete refund off the managers despite her being the one that caused it.

This was on a Monday night and it was a nightmare from start to finish.

If the parents want security then they would have to pay for it, however if they are planning to allow under 18s to have alcohol there you would not find any decent security to cover it as they could lose their SIA license by knowingly allowing under 18s to consume alcohol.

I wouldn't be going near that party myself! I'd tell them I already had plans. CFP (cheeky fucker parents) are out of line there!

Very good point. You need a licence to do this.

I would be taking DD out for the night.

Sounds like carnage - I wouldn't want my DS around that.

Not a chance in Hell.