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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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To be shocked at how many overweight kids there are here?

956 replies

glasgowsfinest · 29/08/2017 18:18

Have got my fireproof hat in place, here goes...! I'm currently at a Butlin's-type holiday park on the south coast. As you can imagine, it's jammed full of kids of all ages. I'm genuinely shocked at how many of them, from pre-schoolers to older teens, are significantly overweight. I don't think puppy fat can be used as an excuse for all of them. Thinking back to my childhood, overweight kids were the exception, not the rule, but now it seems the opposite. I have two children who by no means have a perfect diet, and eat more chocolate and watch more TV than I thought I'd allow, but they're active too and don't seen to have any fat on them at all! Maybe they're just "lucky", I don't know. But the sheer numbers of chunky kids made me feel quite sad.

OP posts:
FairlyConstantNameChanger · 30/08/2017 23:00

While I agree it may not be healthy, there really are people (in the minority) who can eat and eat and not gain weight. I'm one of them, even have a thread at the moment as I am underweight and trying to put some on and finding it almost impossible.

Not saying at all that it is ok to eat loads of crap, just that it is actually perfectly possibly for some people.

Burntcustard · 30/08/2017 23:00

I also agree that grain is behind the obesity epidemic. Every farmer knows that in order to fatten pigs and cattle you feed them grain - cows don't get fat on a grass diet.

Equally, sleek animals tend to be carnivores (cats etc).

The pushing of grain - particularly corn - since the 1970s correlates perfectly with the rise in obesity.

DameDoom · 30/08/2017 23:01

So true Titanz there are so many foods that are nutritionally negligible but by eating them make us hungrier. If I had a Mac D, take-away pizza and a Chinese on consecutive evenings my appetite would go through the roof and I'd be hanging off the kitchen cupboard doors looking for more food.

Chestervase1 · 30/08/2017 23:03

The wheat is genetically modified and twice the size it used to be its now "super wheat". Our bodies cannot process this it is why there is so much cealiac disease.

38cody · 30/08/2017 23:06

Why do people accept that we get our hair colour, eye colour, nose shape, goofy teeth, great cheekbones, height, long fingers, big ears etc etc etc from our parents but when it comes to being overweight a total refusal to accept a genetic link?
Some of the posters on this thread are so vile and nasty that I shan't read any more but if can't see a genetic link then you are deluded by your own vanity.

Titanz · 30/08/2017 23:09

I agree Joan and I would like to invite them to work with me one day.

I'm a working class person who lives in a deprived area and had to learn all about this stuff myself from being aged 17 and living on my own. I gained a lot of weight and its taken me a while to lose it, 4 stone with 6lbs to go. I see the effects of obesity every day and it's horrifying. When you're dressing legs of the morbidly obese because their weeping buckets, when you see people losing limbs because their vascular supply is so compromised, when you see people with malodourous wounds that won't heal, when you see people drowning in fluid because their heart is failing, when it takes 6 of you to roll and clean the faeces off a 38 year old woman who has ate herself into immobility, when you're starting cardiac event treatment on people in their 40s, when you've teens with arthritis because theyve been overweight most of their lives and their cartilage has worn away, when the young girl comes from a&e with cuts all over her skin because she doesn't want to be obese but she knows no different... all these poor poor people who's lives are being impacted or ruined by being obese. And then to look at young overweight and obese kids and imagine that could be what's in store for them. It's heart breaking.

All the while people like Tess Halliday are convincing young people it's fine to be obese and that everyone must shut up about it and accept it, anyone that doesn't is fatphobic. Which has led to a rise in HCPs being afraid to voice concerns because of being labelled and vilified.

PickAChew · 30/08/2017 23:10

Feeding a variety of mashed up, unseasoned homemade food instead of using ready made babyfood introduces a range of textures and tastes. This is said to help raise non-faddy eaters.

This worked fine with DS1, who ate loads of diferent foods, until about the age of 6 when he rapidly went off lots of different foods. he now eats a balanced, if limited core diet. If I allowed him, he'd supplement it with his bodyweight in toffee popcorn, jam doughnuts and hula hoops, every day. We keep those things locked away and rationed out!

DS2 wouldn't touch home made purees. Eventually tried a bit of mushed up Christmas dinner at almost 9 months. Survived on mostly jars with the odd fresh veggie, then regressed in his eating at 18 months and hasn't knowingly touched a vegetable since. I cn put raw broccoli ino his hand and he'll gag.

Feeding a balanced diet to kids with ASD is Such Fun.

Burntcustard · 30/08/2017 23:11

There is a genetic predisposition but you don't become overweight without eating it. Genetics does not explain the global rise in obesity.

My grandmother was severely obese when she died in the 1980s. My DM is also obese. I was obese as a teenager before losing it through diet and lifestyle change aged 20.

My genetic makeup means that I will never be someone who can eat junk and get away with it, but if I eat three times a day with unprocessed food and don't eat when full then I don't gain weight.

mommybunny · 30/08/2017 23:11

Wow. Lots to think about and respond to. Some random thoughts:

--of course there may be medical/SEN reasons a child is overweight despite the best efforts of the child's parents to feed the child a healthy diet; I don't think anyone is disputing that. I do think it is probably the case (though don't know how to verify) that a very large majority of child obesity cases do not involve such issues, and that if the "default" is that children are fed a simple healthy diet in portions that no more than satiate their physical hunger, there might be more empathy, and possibly support, for the outlying cases that involve special circumstances. There would certainly be a lot less "fat shaming".

--I have never understood how parents could not know when their children were overweight; even if they didn't find it odd that their 9 year old children needed 13 year-old trousers taken up it is a matter of literally 2 minutes to weigh and measure your child and input the numbers into the NHS's BMI calculator. I do this with my DCs at least once a year and just jot the date and measurements into an iPhone note (usually around the same time I take them for their school shoes). So far they've both always been in the "healthy" range (and the range for healthy is huge, unless I'm missing something in my grasp of statistics) so I don't note what their percentile is, though I generally remember roughly where it was.

--I am proud of the fact that my DCs eat a healthy, varied diet. Many may say it is just luck that made them that way - maybe, but I know for damn sure that if I hadn't fed them healthy food the likelihood they would find it and eat it on their own is nil.

--having said that, I'm certainly not perfect, and I know I have areas where I have backslid a bit and need to change. My DD10 was measured last week, and while she is still in the healthy range, her percentile has gone up to low 70s from 40s-50s in prior years. I have also noticed her ribs aren't as visible as they have been in the past. I may have hit her just before a growth spurt, but I do also know that I have been a little lazy this summer in letting her go for a walk with DS12 or friends to sweet shops where she has been spending her pocket money. I've been figuring she is getting fresh air and exercise and hoping that would offset the sweets but I've also been enabling a bad habit for her and DS. It isn't just their weight that is affected - their teeth too. Now that term will be starting soon we can put an end to those excursions but I also need to find a way to keep her occupied and give her independence without sweets being involved. It's my issue to sort. But I don't see any need otherwise to change her diet, and while I have told her the sweet jaunts are at an end, the main concern I mentioned was for her teeth (and to stop the sweet wrappers ending up under her bed), so no one needs to tell me to unclench and that I'm setting her up for an eating disorder.

--at the same time, I never fail to be amazed at the reaction people like Jamie Oliver get when they try to change people's attitudes towards feeding themselves and their families healthy food, and try to get the government to help create a supportive environment to bring that change about. People focus (so narrowly and stupidly, in my view) on his style that they won't listen to someone who actually does know what he is talking about - he is qualified now as a nutritionist. But no, they don't like his chipper, upbeat, matey style so they just turn him off.

PickAChew · 30/08/2017 23:13

I live in a northern backwater, decimated in the 80s. Those with even a bit of money drive everywhere, even the half mile to school. Those without never leave the village.

Pestilentialone · 30/08/2017 23:16

38 because all research shows that genes make you about 3kg heavier. Gut flora seems to make a difference to weight, gut flora can be changed by altering what you eat. It is a big complex picture, but we should not ignore it.

DameDoom · 30/08/2017 23:18

People have different body shapes: endomorph, mesomorph etc 38cody and therefore store fat in different ways so will naturally be different. I will always look like a northern pit pony rather than a race horse and that is fine. But when so many of our kids (of all different body types) are hugely overweight, it is a worry. I don't think it's vile and nasty and it's certainly not about vanity... it's about making sure our kids have the best possible chances. Am getting sick of saying this now and I'm not even a parent (for the umpteenth time).

SandyBeachandtheDeckchairs · 30/08/2017 23:23

as stubbornstains said earlier:

Tue 29-Aug-17 19:45:24

It's all cynical marketing from people who just want to make money from the public and care nothing about the health implications.

I'm always surprised on threads like by this how little blame our wider consumer (quite literally!) culture comes in for. We're bombarded with messages - "Have a treat", "Fill that hungry gap", "When your kid needs a snack (do they?)give them our healthy option (is it?)".There are entire supermarket aisles dedicated just to crisps or biscuits, FFS! There's money in obesity for someone.

She's right, there is a shit tonne of money in junk food, it's nutritionally worthless and is cheap to make and buy. Lots of people don't know how to cook properly and just live off junk food. It's no wonder our health is declining. I think it's heartbreaking.

Ollivander84 · 30/08/2017 23:24

See I think Ashley graham and Tess are two completely different spectrums
Tess can't get up off the floor on her own, Ashley is in the gym and regularly posts her workouts

I don't think encouraging people to love their body is a bad thing because it may be that helps them to not be self conscious and go for a walk, or treat their body well by eating healthy food. I've spent SO many years being told how fat/ugly I am and I refuse to do it any more. You should love your body however it is because you're living in it, and if you hate it, it's not a great thing for making it better/stronger/fitter
It's the same with clothes, even if you're losing weight you need clothes now, and you shouldn't have to wear a tent because you're bigger

Titanz · 30/08/2017 23:24

On another note what do people think about some over eating being classed as an addiction?

I crave food more than I've ever craved a cigarette (when I smoked) or a drug. I think we have all been there when we have had something in the fridge that's a bit bad for us but we haven't been able to stop thinking about it till we have ate it. I bet there's a couple of us who have binged then instantly regretted it and cried (hands up!). I've struggled denying myself fatty foods more than I struggled when I gave up smoking.

It's interesting

Getout21 · 30/08/2017 23:26

This thread has really made me think. I snack far too much & mostly without realising.

Pestilentialone · 30/08/2017 23:28

Fat and sugar are addictive, junk food manufacturers know this and work on it, it earns them money. It takes a lot of will power to resist. I can resist buying it, but if it is in the house, I want to eat it.

Titanz · 30/08/2017 23:35

It's weird how we don't, as a society, treat it as an addiction though. We label people lazy or gluttons.

I'm wondering if maybe we focused on the addictive aspect a bit more and compared it to drugs it would hit harder? I dunno, just throwing it out there

DameDoom · 30/08/2017 23:35

Too right Titanz. Sugar really is pure crack and it is hidden in everything - it's a full-time occupation reading food labels... and that is in what is meant to be the better stuff.
Why put loads of sugar and palm oil in stuff that does not need it? To what end? I hope Trump doesn't get more of a foothold over here with Brexit - we will be high fructose corn syrup Arizona literally.
Is it a global corn conspiracy?

Titanz · 30/08/2017 23:39

Mine is carbs. I don't think carbs are physically addictive (I've not actually looked into this, someone can correct me if I'm wrong) but psychologically i feel myself craving them. If theres a bag of crisps in I'll sit thinking about them, how pathetic does that sound!

I suppose it's a bit like cannabis in that respect, it's not physically addictive but can be psychologically and some people struggle with it.

SandyBeachandtheDeckchairs · 30/08/2017 23:42

I find this reliance on 'snacking' really weird. Does it have to be crisps or something sweet all the time? We just used to have a banana, raw carrot or an apple. I think that a lot of the food we give our kids as 'treats' are ruining their health.

chirpyburbycheapsheep · 30/08/2017 23:42

re addiction I posted this study further up the thread:

www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/23719144

Sugar is quite literally like crack

HelenaDove · 30/08/2017 23:52

"They won't be healthy, but they wont be fat" said Titanz

Translation..............Visceral fat doesnt matter because it doesnt show.

DameDoom · 30/08/2017 23:52

All carbs turn to sugar Titanz and the body doesn't recognise the difference between carbs from potatoes or Haribo - they all end up the same: sugar.
I have totally stabilised my weight and appetite by going LCHF... it's great not to be constantly hungry and as I said upthread, it has helped my arthritis immeasurably which is by far the main positive for me. I'll take nagging aches rather than complete agony. It changed my life.
Mind you, I doubt very much I would have done it if I hadn't been nigh on crippled.

HelenaDove · 31/08/2017 00:00

Titanz i find some of the comments on this thread and im childfree by choice and ive lost 10 stone.

So where do i fit into your little theory on the previous page.