To not want to reserve baby names?!?

[sausagesaremyfave]

This is weird I know.... but in a nutshell my sister and I have never gotten on. We didn't speak for a long time after I gave birth to my daughter because when I told my sister her name she went batshit.. the day after I gave birth, which wasn't straight forward by any means.
The reason for this was apparently I 'stole' her baby name. She wasn't ttc at the time, we didn't EVER discuss names because I strictly told everyone I wasn't talking about it. I wanted zero opinions on names.
You would have thought after a late miscarriage previously and difficulty ttc she would have just been happy for me!
Fast forward to now, she's ttc and she knows I would like another one anytime in the near future. She wants to reserve baby names so that I don't 'steal' anymore but I think this is batshit and I'm not going to be told I can't have any baby names from a list as long as my bloody arm?!?
AIBU to tell her that this won't be happening?
Thanks in advance!

She sounds a bloody nightmare. But if you haven't decided on a name for dc2 yet I'd be tempted to let her 'have' a name for an easy life maybe that makes me a pushover I definitely wouldn't if I'd decided on a name though!

So she wasn't even pregnant, but didn't want you to name your daughter something she might want to use herself at some unspecified time in the future?

Yep, total batshit.

Tell her to piss off, she's being ridiculous.

Let her give you the list, what you do after is up to you. Make no promises.

My BF tried to conceive for years and we both liked the name Caitlyn if we had girls, out of respect for her I didn't use it. It meant more to her than to is as there's loads of lovely names and trends change.

Neither of you are even currently pregnant? Yes this is batshit. She needs to get over it. If there was one name she was dead set on, to the exclusion of all other names, then maybe I'd accept being asked nicely to "let" her use it, but it sounds like a whole list from what you're saying.

Yep she wasn't pregnant or ttc, just wanted to use that name someday. My worry is that I'm really picky with names.
We already pretty much have decided on a couple of girl/boy options if we were lucky enough to have another.

Friends of ours recently had a baby which they named our favourite boys name. I'm pregnant with a girl so I was briefly disappointed that the name is gone but I'm not in a position to use it so got over it. My Dsis has a boys name that I know she's wanted tk use long before I got pregnant so I wouldn't use it but we've spoken about that. Your sister is batshit.

YANBU

My worry is that I'm really picky with names

Everyone is when naming their child tho, I don't think anyone picks their kids name out of a hat!😂

You use whatever name you want, it's No one else's business, who cares if you end up using the same one anyway. She sounds like a nutter. Don't bow to her ridiculous demands.

Yep. Batshit.
Tell her you'll make a decision on names according to the circumstances and your preferences if and when the situation arises.

I don't understand this at all. In my friendship group and family we have about tiny pool of names- everyone's got a namesake.

It's daft yes. Although for an easier life is probably age to her having 1 or 2 names for a girl and the same for a boy. Certainly no big lists though.

Ask for the list. look at it and say "oh goodness no, I hate all these, they are awful, no chance I'd use any of them"

Smile and hand it back to her.

Batshit

When I was 8 months pg my friend, who was not pregnant, very kindly told me that if I wanted I could have the names she'd baggsied and that she wouldnt mind at all. This was after she had spent weeks moaning that another mutual friend had "stolen" another name on her list. I didn't believe her, weirdly.

You could have called DD Artemia Smirffwarden Klingdad III and it would still have been the name she wanted to use.

When it comes to it, whoever gives birth first gets first dibs. Just don't tell anyone (including your mother, best friend, woman on the checkout) what you've decided on.

Why did she think you stole her baby name? Was it a name she had always stated it was her intention to use, even though you did not discuss it in the context of your DC.

Just get her to tell you the names she wants and let her get on with it. Save yourself anymore stress.

Just ignore.

I wouldn't entertain such fuckwittery at all.

I cried when my sil announced the name they were using for their DD. It happened to be exactly the name we had chosen before I had a miscarriage. Hormones were running high!

My cousin just had a baby, shortly before our dc2 is born. I did breathe a sigh of relief when she announced the name and it wasn't what we had chosen.

Devil I think you've hit the nail on the head there. She was strange after I had a miscarriage as she "didn't know I'd be trying so soon". I think there's probably more too it and maybe she's just a bit funny about DD being the first baby- who knows?!?

"Sis, the absolute worst case scenario here is that both our little ones will have the same name. I'm ok with that." And move on.

Lady nope we had never discussed names before and I never heard her mention this name, I loved it for years and I'm sure it would have registered if she'd mentioned it.

'I'm not discussing it with anyone'

Rinse and repeat.

Personally I would think of a name that is shit and beg her not to use it.......but then I'm cruel.

Are the names she wants to reserve names you'd choose?

She sounds very hard work and I'm not surprised you keep your distance.