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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Crowdfunding for a new car? Seriously?!

92 replies

iammargesimpson · 28/08/2017 11:35

So an acquaintance of mine 's car died and a crowdfunding page has been set up to buy her a new one...I'm gobsmacked!! She doesn't work, has two primary school-age children, lone parent. Now I understand what it's like when you're faced with sudden and very large expenses (my car died suddenly about a year ago) but crowdfunding for a new car?! Has the world gone mad or am I alone in thinking this is just??? Words fail me they really do

OP posts:
brasty · 28/08/2017 12:28

I think people who donate to stuff like this are mad. Plenty of people can't afford cars. Yes having one makes life much easier, but it is not a necessity, unlike food and a roof over your head.

TaliZorahVasNormandy · 28/08/2017 12:28

I fancy Australia next year. Maybe I should give it a go.

Lweji · 28/08/2017 12:29

If someone else put up the page for her without her knowledge, then she has good friends.
It looks like some people think she deserves it and don't want to treat her like a beggar.

In particular, if she is an acquaintance, don't judge. You may not know about specific circumstances.

tinypop4 · 28/08/2017 12:31

I can't believe that people think YABU! On the same website where people think babyshowers or asking grandparents to help with school fees is 'grabby' or 'rude', people think asking for strangers to fund a new car is okay.
Cars are very convenient and people's lives are easier with them, but largely people can manage without. It is not akin to a foodbank or medical care - these things are essential and no one should go without.

Want2bSupermum · 28/08/2017 12:33

So she is a lone parent who isn't working. Where is the father of the children and why are they not providing the mother with a car?

Why do we keep criticizing mothers and not the fathers who do not support the children they have.

expatinscotland · 28/08/2017 12:33

Who cares? Don't donate.

Lweji · 28/08/2017 12:34

Where is the father of the children and why are they not providing the mother with a car?

Maybe he's the one who set up the page?

ImperialBlether · 28/08/2017 12:35

If someone can't afford a car how are they going to afford insurance, tax, servicing and MOTs?

There are some really cheeky buggers on there - and yes, it's different from your mates clubbing together - they're asking complete strangers to pay for something they want. I'm all for crowdfunding if there are special needs involved but not just because someone fancies a car. One guy was on there wanting a car so he could pick up his 18 year old daughter from work, ffs.

User5Million · 28/08/2017 12:39

Imperial buying a car often requires a lump sum up front, which many people might not have. Insurance/tax etc doesn't usually require 100s or 1000s of £ up front as you can pay for those on a monthly basis!

Anecdoche · 28/08/2017 12:40

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Showandtell · 28/08/2017 12:45

A friend of mine was seriously contemplating this when her oven broke.

I was praying that she didn,t do it as there was no way I would have donated and then it would have been weird between us.

PortiaCastis · 28/08/2017 12:46

Scroungers scammers and beggars everywhere on the net, don't donate !

x2boys · 28/08/2017 12:48

Meh I wouldn't give anything but if people want to give it's up to them .I saw a rather more tragic one this morning for an ex work colleague who died suddenly people had set up a just giving page for funeral costsSad

WhamBarsArentAsFizzyAsTheyWere · 28/08/2017 12:49

they're asking complete strangers to pay for something they want

Not always.

I know of a couple of people who set up pages that were only shared with friends. Obviously anyone can stumble across a page and donate if they wish but people can just choose to ask people they know as well.

Lweji · 28/08/2017 12:50

Have people noticed this?
She didn't set up the page herself, apparently she didn't know about it.

limitedperiodonly · 28/08/2017 12:52

Why do people get worked up about this? And posters saying: 'Maybe I should ask for a holiday or a new washing machine?' Maybe you should. You probably won't get anything but so long as you're not swindling anyone, where's the harm?

Sugarditch04 · 28/08/2017 12:55

Crowd funding is all about what people want to some extent.
If you don't like it, don't donate.

tararabumdeay · 28/08/2017 12:55

Some replies are really mean. To some people, especially in rural areas (two buses a week) a car is a necessity. It's not all about getting to school or shops.

In the past I've had a legal car which was a liability because of nowhere to park it. I'd gladly donate it to someone who needed it more than the £55 We Buy Any Scrap (and make a fortune selling bits).

One time my darling friend gave me a tear inducing cash gift with no strings. I used it to get the gas turned back on for winter. We'd fallen behind due to sudden family illness; hotel bills far from home.

I'd like to pay that gift on anonymously now my friend is not here anymore. I can't afford the whole sum at once. If an acquaintance was in need and I could be anonymous I wouldn't think twice.

x2boys · 28/08/2017 12:55

I agree limited ad long as people are being honest then whats the problem I wouldn't give to someone who wanted a new car or washing machine or a trip to Disney land but if people are daft enough to donate then I can't see the problemConfused

ememem84 · 28/08/2017 12:57

I might try it. Currently 8m pregnant and am missing horse riding. I need a pony for when baby boy arrives.

x2boys · 28/08/2017 12:58

Go on then ememem...

SonicBoomBoom · 28/08/2017 12:58

Can you link, OP? I'd like to donate to the cause.

Finola1step · 28/08/2017 12:58

I'd love a new kitchen but budget won't stretch...

limitedperiodonly · 28/08/2017 13:03

I know of a couple of people who set up pages that were only shared with friends. Obviously anyone can stumble across a page and donate if they wish but people can just choose to ask people they know as well.

My friend has done the same wham. She needs help with legal fees and she's outlined why. Every donation except one is from a friend. There's an anonymous one for £1,000. It could be a shy friend or it could be a stranger who agrees with her cause and has £1,000 to spare.

chirpyburbycheapsheep · 28/08/2017 13:05

I don't get the outrage. She asked, people can say no. I don't see it as begging. If I don't go on the site then I won't see it, it's not like people begging in the street where it's hard to avoid. And what's with the moralising around begging anyway? I give to beggars regularly. I also find the description of her not working interesting. There has been no context. Are you implying that she is simply a 'freeloader' in general, and if so, what evidence do you have for this? Her friends obviously felt her worthy to set this up so I think it was nice of them whether or not people donate. Also, I grew up in the sticks where if your parents didn't drive you were basically stuck as there was almost zero public transport.

Anyway, I am a socialist so all for spreading the wealth around. If you can afford to help someone buy a new car, even have a nice holiday, why the hell not? I don't think generosity in society is a bad thing.