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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

blacked out, wet myself, AIBU about incontinence knickers

75 replies

Redfaced2017 · 26/08/2017 18:53

Ok, this is roughly what happened,

had a stressful day yesterday - mammogram came back earlier in the week showing an abnormality so had to go for a needle-biopsie, but it all worked out well in the end, it was a cyst. It was around 4pm I got the all clear. I was of course over the moon. Went home, got changed and went out to dinner with DH at 7pm. I felt on top of the world, liek all the stress of the previous days ahd just vanished... then all of a sudden, without warning, after the starter, just started on our mains and I fainted or blacked out.

Was out cold for around 3 minutes, when I came to I realised I had wet myself. And not a dribble, no, completely emptied my bladder judging by how my clothes, the seat etc looked. It was mortifying. I can hardly even type this.

Saw a doc late last night and while I do have to follow up with my GP he felt my neuro signs and heart signs could all keep till Monday when I have to see my GP for further tests.

Was supposed to go out with my best friend tomorrow but I said I had to go first and buy some incontinence knickers. Both my best friend and my husband feel I am jumping the gun here and being a bit over dramatic with insisting I can't go out the door without incontinence knickers on till I know this isn't going to happen again.

My AIBU is, if you had one fainting spell, zero warning, in a busy public place, and emptied your bladder would you wear incontinence knickers too, or would you be more like my friend and husband who both think more along the lines of "well it's only ever happened once and not likely to happen again".

I just need more opinions as I KNOW I am VERY emotional today, and chances are high that I am maybe not thinking straight, but I think husband and friend are insane to even suggest I just chance it. Right now I feel like I will never leave the house EVER again without them on.

AIBU?

OP posts:
AnnMeredithPerkins · 26/08/2017 18:54

If it's going to make you feel more comfortable and secure, go get some and stuff dh and df

StarkintheSouth · 26/08/2017 18:55

If it makes you feel more confident buy them whilst you get to the bottom of what happened to you. Get well soon x

foursthescore · 26/08/2017 18:55

Poor you!!!

Yes I would wear them. For peace of mind. Perhaps it was the stress of the breast issue? I hope you get to the bottom of it.

tinytemper66 · 26/08/2017 18:55

Maybe not knickers but some incontinence pads. If I sneeze or cough or laugh too much, I leak so I always wear a pad.

x2boys · 26/08/2017 18:56

Did you have a fit? I think I would be more concerned about what caused the passing out than the incontinence?

Arsenicinthesugarbowl · 26/08/2017 18:57

You poor thing-what a scary thing to happen to you. You'll probably be fine without incontinence knicks. But if it gives you certainty and reassurance while you have physical investigations and means you can go out without stressing then go for it.

nocoolnamesleft · 26/08/2017 18:58

If the incontinence knickers give you the confidence to go out, then fine. But I'm a bit worried that if you wet yourself when you blacked out, it's a bit less likely to be a standard faint, and might possibly be a fit. Just in case, be careful until you see your GP: don't drive, and don't lock the bathroom door!

Shadow1986 · 26/08/2017 18:59

Sorry this happened to you, sounds very traumatic.
I think in the same situation I would feel the same as you, and while the chances of it happening again probably are small, there isn't any harm wearing the incontinence knickers until you get to the bottom of what's happened.

I don't know if this will make you feel better but if I were in a restaurant (either working or dining) and this happened to a fellow diner, I would just be concerned about their wellbeing, I wouldn't even batter an eyelid about the fact they had emptied their bladder while unconscious - so please please don't worry about that.

Hope you feel better very soon.

TheSparrowhawk · 26/08/2017 18:59

Eh what? If you emptied your bladder there's a chance you had a seizure. The last thing I'd be worrying about is knickers!

user1493413286 · 26/08/2017 19:00

I think the chances of it happening again are very slim but if it makes you feel more comfortable then do it and once you feel more reassured you don't need to any more.

lidoshuffle · 26/08/2017 19:03

This exact same thing happened to me in work about 4 years ago. Came too after some minutes, an ambulance had been called and I was lying by my desk in a pool of my own pee Blush. I was ok after, but got taken home in the caretakers van, sitting on a plastic sack Grin.

No recurrence at all in all these years. I got sent to a consultant and he had no concerns about epilepsy etc. Don't worry Redfaced , it'll probably not happen again, but if it makes you feel more secure wear the pads for a few days. Please don't worry.

Original poster
Redfaced2017 · 26/08/2017 19:03

I am scared pads won't cut it. This was no wee bit of leakage. It's hard to say but yy trouser were wet (soaked) all the way down to the knees... the cushion of the seat was wet through, the plastic wicker (outdoor) seat was wet and there was pee on the ground under my seat. Checked all the incontinence products and it looks more like the special knickers with a pouch where you insert a heavy duty pad is what is needed for 300 ml and above. And I am guessing that's roughly what a full bladder is. Thanks to you all I don't feel I am deciding to do this just because I am over emotional. Fuck DH and BF :-)

I-knickers here I come

OP posts:
shamoffour · 26/08/2017 19:03

If it makes you feel more comfortable do it. But I do you think you maybe jumping the gun a bit. My dd has seizures (related to to her temperature) and she often wets herself when she has one.
Was there any convulsing when you fainted?

Viviennemary · 26/08/2017 19:04

I agree that you should be concerned about what caused this black out and stop worrying too much about the incontinence. It could have been stress, or signs or signs of epilepsy. But if you're worried then get some.

SpiritedLondon · 26/08/2017 19:05

Ummm you blacked out for 3 minutes and everyone's worrying about you wetting yourself? . I can appreciate that it was embarrassing but I think the main issue is the cause of the blackout and not the wetting. I would probably wear those incontinence pads / knickers that I've seen advertised on TV ( they look very slim) but I don't think I'd be socialising until I knew what the problem had been. Good luck I hope you get an answer soon.

HemanOrSheRa · 26/08/2017 19:08

God. You poor thing Flowers. I would do exactly the same thing. How frightening for you.

Something similar happened to me after I got the all clear after treatment for an abnormal smear. DP and I went to our local pub. I had one glass of white wine and passed out.

There is a thing - vasovagal syncope which you may like to Google to put your mind at rest while you wait to see your GP.

Keepthebloodynoisedown · 26/08/2017 19:08

It sounds like the incontinence was secondary to the fainting, but if it gives you the confindence to go out then why not.

I pass out quite regularly because my body hates me and I second what pp have said about not driving, and not locking the bathroom door. Less obvious ones I'd add are not lingering at the top of the stairs, and standing back from roads before you cross, if you get train/ tube standing well away from the edge for the time being, just to minimise the damage if it happens again.
Really hope it doesn't though, and that the drs get to the bottom of it Flowers

robinia · 26/08/2017 19:09

You can empty your bladder with a normal faint. Many years ago I had a joint issue. I wrenched it awkwardly, blacked out in the process and when I came round had emptied my bladder Sad I was told it wasn't unusual.
Not going to be much help here but until the blacking out is diagnosed I wouldn't go out. I did myself quite a lot of damage from just the one episode.

zzzzz · 26/08/2017 19:10

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Original poster
Redfaced2017 · 26/08/2017 19:10

The doc last night suspected some kind of fit was a possibility but after doing lots of neuro test things (like eyes closed touch the tip of your nose with the tip of your index finger type of things) he felt confident that it was "just" a faint. Of course I am concerned about the underlying causes, but it still does not change I can't think of leaving the house without I-knickers on. If that sounds flippant, I don't mean it to. But I do think I am going to have multiple medical appointments this coming week and yes i am very worried about pissing myself in public. Shallow maybe? But so be it. It is how I feel.

OP posts:
CatsAreAssholes · 26/08/2017 19:10

I'd feel the same as you.

zzzzz · 26/08/2017 19:11

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

ChaChaChaCh4nges · 26/08/2017 19:12

DS has epilepsy and wets himself.

Also, don't ride a bike on the public highway or take a bath (showers are fine without the door locked).

Fingers crossed it was just a one off.

zzzzz · 26/08/2017 19:13

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

HemanOrSheRa · 26/08/2017 19:16

It's not shallow at all OP. You must feel very frightened and generally discombobulated by the whole experience . Breast abnormalities, mammograms, biopsies etc. And then fainting Flowers.