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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

blacked out, wet myself, AIBU about incontinence knickers

75 replies

Redfaced2017 · 26/08/2017 18:53

Ok, this is roughly what happened,

had a stressful day yesterday - mammogram came back earlier in the week showing an abnormality so had to go for a needle-biopsie, but it all worked out well in the end, it was a cyst. It was around 4pm I got the all clear. I was of course over the moon. Went home, got changed and went out to dinner with DH at 7pm. I felt on top of the world, liek all the stress of the previous days ahd just vanished... then all of a sudden, without warning, after the starter, just started on our mains and I fainted or blacked out.

Was out cold for around 3 minutes, when I came to I realised I had wet myself. And not a dribble, no, completely emptied my bladder judging by how my clothes, the seat etc looked. It was mortifying. I can hardly even type this.

Saw a doc late last night and while I do have to follow up with my GP he felt my neuro signs and heart signs could all keep till Monday when I have to see my GP for further tests.

Was supposed to go out with my best friend tomorrow but I said I had to go first and buy some incontinence knickers. Both my best friend and my husband feel I am jumping the gun here and being a bit over dramatic with insisting I can't go out the door without incontinence knickers on till I know this isn't going to happen again.

My AIBU is, if you had one fainting spell, zero warning, in a busy public place, and emptied your bladder would you wear incontinence knickers too, or would you be more like my friend and husband who both think more along the lines of "well it's only ever happened once and not likely to happen again".

I just need more opinions as I KNOW I am VERY emotional today, and chances are high that I am maybe not thinking straight, but I think husband and friend are insane to even suggest I just chance it. Right now I feel like I will never leave the house EVER again without them on.

AIBU?

OP posts:
BuzzKillington · 26/08/2017 19:16

I'd be more worried about losing consciousness tbh.

BoysaDearyMe · 26/08/2017 19:17

I also would be concened that you may have had a fit rather than just a faint.
I developed epilepsy after the death of a family member, and have had a couple of episodes since - always stress induced where I 'faint' and wet myself (only happened 3 or 4 times over a 20 year period). Always happens after the stress event has passed so I would suggest that the biopsy you had was very stressful and may have caused you to have a fit, not just a faint.

Sorry as I know you'd rather it was just a faint, but if this is the case for you then you're better being aware of how sensitive our bodies really can be (and can be reassured that you're not going to wet yourself as a matter of course moving forward, hopefully it was a one off)

Be kind to yourself and take it easy

Original poster
Redfaced2017 · 26/08/2017 19:20

doc last night said I will have blood tests and an ECG this week, and possibly more low-level neuro tests like he did last night. No tongue biting, no jerking while I was out cold, no saliva dribbling. He checked my tongue and inside of my mouth/inner cheeks thoroughly. Doc basically said there was no reason to think this was a seizure. Just a bad fainiting spell.

OP posts:
McButtonwillow · 26/08/2017 19:22

I really don't think it's helpful to worry the op more then necessary about the possibility of fits/pilepsy, I'm sure she'll be fully investigated by her GP.

You can empty your bladder during a simple faint, both my ds and dh have had the same thing happen.

pigsDOfly · 26/08/2017 19:27

It's not shallow in the least not to want to pee all over yourself because you've passed out and yes, in your situation I most definitely would wear them if it gives you the confidence to comfortably leave the house.

Don't really understand why posters are saying that this is the least of your worries OP. It sounds like it's all being investigated, meanwhile, anything that helps you feel happier is a bonus. Sounds like you've got enough on your plate without worrying about this as well.

theancientmarinader · 26/08/2017 19:27

If it was 'just' a faint, then it is likely to be one off, and absolutely no need to go buying incontinence pads.
It does sound more like a seizure to me, but hey, what do I know. You've seen a medical professional.
Either way, I don't actually know anyone who wears incontinence pants for either seizures or fainting. Yes, you are being ridiculous. The very last thing that a bystander cares about when someone collapses in front of them is whether they lose control of their bladder - really.

You are going to spend a shitload of money and be self conscious and possibly less comfortable for no reason.

MammaTJ · 26/08/2017 19:30

I think you are just taking sensible precautions until you know more.

YANBU

BendydickCuminsnatch · 26/08/2017 19:30

I don't think continence pants or pads could deal with a full bladder's worth could they? But if it makes you feel more confident YADNBU!! Sorry you had to go through that.

lozzylizzy · 26/08/2017 19:33

I wear them as knickers when im on my period! It helps my confidence as to not leak so I would definitely do the same in your situation! Hope you get answers soon.

YANBU

AnnMeredithPerkins · 26/08/2017 19:33

If it was 'just' a faint, then it is likely to be one off, and absolutely no need to go buying incontinence pads.

There is a need if the op feels they cannot leave the house without them
What harm will it do if the op does get some and then feels ok to go out, or would you prefer she became a recluse?

Lovemusic33 · 26/08/2017 19:37

It's happened to me and as far as I know it was some kind of seizure ,happened many years ago and never happened again.

Original poster
Redfaced2017 · 26/08/2017 19:44

There is a need if the op feels they cannot leave the house without them What harm will it do if the op does get some and then feels ok to go out, or would you prefer she became a recluse?

right now that's EXACTLY how I feel. It's stay home in normal knickers or get the I-knickers and pads and lead a normal life while I am getting all the testing done. I don't know how much these 300ml pads will actually hold, but rest assured they'll be trial-ed out with a can of coke at home.

And to the people that went on about extreme costs... not that bad at all, 3 pairs of special pouch cotton knickers, and 5 reusable (washable) cotton pads for about 40 quid. I won't buy the disposable ones because of course the chances of actually soiling them are very small.

I will probably look like Mrs Brown on a bad day, but hey ho. Needs must.

OP posts:
zzzzz · 26/08/2017 19:44

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Tinty · 26/08/2017 19:46

Can I ask? Did you have gas and air when you had the biopsy? I had a procedure one day at 1.30. Stayed in hospital until 4.00 all fine, drove myself to Tesco on the way home to pick some dinner up got there at 5.00. Felt fine at 5.20 went to the check out and every one went blurry and felt like they were talking to me from far away. They steered me away from the checkouts and sat me down and got me a drink of water and after 5 mins I was ok again. I very nearly fainted it was about 4 hours later and came from nowhere. I think it was the gas and air and dehydration even though I had had two drinks after the procedure.

HemanOrSheRa · 26/08/2017 19:49

Red buy the pants, wear them to give you confidence. Enjoy your day tomorrow. You'll have the tests you need as a follow up. I hope all is well Flowers.

Original poster
Redfaced2017 · 26/08/2017 19:49

thanks to all of you have shared that this has happened to them or happened to relatives. That alone really helps. I had NEVER heard of anyone faint and lose control of their bladder. With a seizure or a stroke yes, but never with "just" fainting. So knowing it has happened to others, and they have gone on to have no repeats, well that alone has perked me up a good bit. And thanks to you all for all your opinions. I appreciate the times you all took. Thanks! I think I will go and buy them tomorrow and wear them outside of my home for the forseeable future. Also thanks to the person who gave the tips about not lingering at the top of stairs/train platforms etc. All very good tips and things I hadn't considered. I have maybe fainted 10 times in my entire life and never like this.

OP posts:
Original poster
Redfaced2017 · 26/08/2017 19:56

Are you in the uk? I have never had anyone check dd's mouth. EEGs only really detect epilepsy (i.e. Abnormal brain activity) if they are done pretty soon after the event (I think within 12 hours). Being unconscious for 3 mins is quite a long time (5 mins is the cut off for calling an ambulance). Did you go to A&E?

yes I went to A&E. The mouth I am sure he was checking to see if I had bit my tongue. He did certainly ask that, but later had a good old look around the inside of my mouth. I THINK the doc last night said I would be sent for an ECG. Not an EEG. But to be honest I am not sure. He did say something about heart though. So I suspect ECG. A man was mopping my face with cold water when I came to and got the fright of my life, at that very point another customer was dialling an ambulance, the consensus was at the very least 2 minutes but most people said 3minutes. I pleaded no ambulance and thank god woman listened, it allowed me to go home have a quick shower then go to the A&E.

OP posts:
Original poster
Redfaced2017 · 26/08/2017 20:01

Can I ask? Did you have gas and air when you had the biopsy? I had a procedure one day at 1.30. Stayed in hospital until 4.00 all fine, drove myself to Tesco on the way home to pick some dinner up got there at 5.00. Felt fine at 5.20 went to the check out and every one went blurry and felt like they were talking to me from far away. They steered me away from the checkouts and sat me down and got me a drink of water and after 5 mins I was ok again. I very nearly fainted it was about 4 hours later and came from nowhere. I think it was the gas and air and dehydration even though I had had two drinks after the procedure

No I didn't have gas and air, it was just a needle. And it was more or less painless. No worse than when they draw blood. Just a little sting really.

Sorry yours left you a bit floored too. Flowers

OP posts:
PollyPerky · 26/08/2017 20:05

It's up to you but I'd be staying close to home for a few days.

I can't see why anyone would suggest an ECG for a faint. ECG is for heart rhythms.

It might surprise you but loss of bladder control when the body is compromised is very common. I once saw an old lady who'd fallen over in the street- ambulance was on its way- and she was lying in a puddle, poor thing.

iklboo · 26/08/2017 20:08

An ECG can detect heart problems that can also cause faints.

bizzieb33 · 26/08/2017 20:10

My dad had/ has a heart problem I think arrhythmia or something like that and that was diagnosed after a faint so ECG could be useful. Hope you are okay and I would go with big pants while everything is being sorted out myself xx

Aquamarine1029 · 26/08/2017 20:11

I'm so sorry you had such a traumatic experience. However, I think you're far too worked up about wetting yourself. You didn't do this on purpose and you should feel no shame about it. When you finally came to, did everyone point and laugh at you? Of course not! They were all probably very concerned about your welfare. Even if this were to happen again, who cares! A little bit of wee never hurt anyone.

Original poster
Redfaced2017 · 26/08/2017 20:12

yes he I think he (A&E doc) thought heart issues could be playing a role. My BP was sky high last night (have never had high BP) but both my parents have heart conditions as did 3 out 4 of my grand parents. So he seemed to be sure my GP would send me for an ECG. He also said my heart rate was very fast. Neither BP nor heart so fast that I couldn't safely go home, but bad enough to take it up with GP on Monday.

OP posts:
Doglikeafox · 26/08/2017 20:14

There's no harm in wearing them is there? Right now things are still very fresh and raw in your memory so personally I would do whatever is going to give you the most peace of mind.
I'm sure everything will be fine... that huge relief after lots of worry and angst can do strange things SmileFlowers

millymae · 26/08/2017 20:16

If it's any comfort the exact thing happened to me in a high street music store whilst I was waiting for my now OH to pay for something.
I remember feeling a bit strange and then finding myself on the floor in a puddle with my OH and others standing over me. Everyone was very kind and they took me to the staff room, made me a drink and allowed me to clean myself up whilst OH went to buy me a change of clothes.
I recovered really quickly and a visit to the doctors the next day found nothing obviously wrong. He did ask me though whether there was any possibility I could be pregnant and arranged for bloods to be done which came back showing that I was anaemic.
I agree with the ancient marinadeder about the incontinence pants - they really aren't necessary. If it happens again and you're wearing them they won't stop you being embarrassed and you'll still feel uncomfortable. They may just prevent a puddle on the floor, but anyone who's bothered about that or thinks its funny is not worth worrying about.