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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To be fed up of Instamums

999 replies

Hmmmmx100 · 25/08/2017 22:56

I followed a few of the more well-known Instamums but got weary of the constant daily barrage of brand endorsements. I can't relate to people on £100k a year in Farrow & Ball houses. I just can't. So I had to unfollow em all, every one. AIBU to feel a bit miffed that these people are using the idea of sisterhood to make money? They're not our friends, they're just there to sell us stuff that we probably don't need anyway.

OP posts:
Kickhiminthenuts · 26/08/2017 09:48

I have this with my ds trying to explain that the youtubers he watches aren't "real".
Their houses have certainly got more impressive over the years.

What amazes me is the cleanliness of the houses these are ad hoc videos, but the houses are all spotless!!!!

The insta mums I can't knock for making money they've done well, i am slightly envious I didn't jump on the bandwagon. but my house isn't clean enough, my kids don't have posh names and I haven't got anything painted farrow and ball
But the 'selling your kids soul' doesn't sit well with me. I completely get it up until about school age, that's when they start to build their own separate life from you and I don't think it's fair. that said a nest egg for them would be nice

BlackHillsofDakota · 26/08/2017 09:50

I don't get why you all care so much? I actually like watching their stories even though their lives are completely different to mine but if you don't then just unfollow.
All this talk of cliques and means girls, you all sound a bit like that to be honest, slating them and bitching about them.
Live and let live I say.

CourtneyLoveIsMySpiritAnimal · 26/08/2017 09:53

They seemed like one big clique and sometimes were quite intolerant of people who didn't agree with them or criticised them

The midwife hounded someone off IG for that after setting her followers on her. Left a bit of a bad taste in the mouth.

Original poster
Hmmmmx100 · 26/08/2017 09:53

Loads of posts are ads without being tagged as thus. I hope the Mx Taxperson comes a-knocking...

OP posts:
justilou1 · 26/08/2017 09:56

I loathe it all. Consumerism is the new religion. I also have the hedonistic, excessive food instashit. (Like freakshakes, unicorn everything, etc...) It makes me despair that my kids may grow up with those sorts of priorities.

TinyTeaPig · 26/08/2017 09:57

Courtney I remember that. And the mum she hounded off is much more like the other mums I know than the midwife is.
I like the midwife and follow her. But she used to be a lot more relatable to me personally than she is now. Though who would do any different if they were in her shoes?

Original poster
Hmmmmx100 · 26/08/2017 10:03

I would do differently. I just wouldn't do it.

OP posts:
ZaraW · 26/08/2017 10:11

Step away from the Instamums and look at more interesting things I follow photographers, nature and wildlife who have amazing and interesting posts. Someone trying to show a tiny portion of their life as being perfect is laughable.

FANTINE2 · 26/08/2017 11:21

I like looking at the nature type ones too, but I recently got sucked in to the fashion ones, and got quite addicted to some of them.
Some I do enjoy looking at, but others are just so nouveau riche look at me types.
If I see one more GG handbag, I think I will scream. They all have the same stuff! There has been one on this week who has been on holiday in the S of France. Insta stories of Clinking champagne glasses in beach clubs that are the French equivalent of Blackpool. Unfollow .

ThomasHardyPerennial · 26/08/2017 11:35

The American mother and father of five who left leafy Highgate and travelled the world, recently settling in Australia. No tv the kids only play with wooden toys. My arse.

The mother is a member of one of the richest families in the USA - they come from immense wealth. I don't know why she needs freebies from companies for her children to promote.

Sortitout21 · 26/08/2017 11:38

Simpatico - I have no problem with the family's wealth. The hypocrisy of living a simple life, no conspicuous consumption but then peddling £80 dresses is just a bit odd.

I was an early adopter of instagram & do love it however it's an annoying that everyone becomes clones. All wearing the same bag, jacket, mama sweater, monochrome nurseries etc. All so individual but the same, just like men in E. London with beards, man buns & tattoo sleeves.

I completely understand wanting to make money from it & who wouldn't turn down a free holiday but I'd like there to be more transparency with ads & ideally they would only advertise stuff that fits with their 'brand'.

ElspethFlashman · 26/08/2017 11:46

My entire Instagram is made up of Instamummies. Oh god. I don't know how it happened!

I do delete the ones that are just #ad after #ad but I'm pretty sure you only have to declare that when money has exchanged hands. When someone is tagging a baby clothes company with a drawn on arrow in Instastories, it's just as much of an ad.

Most of them seem to literally have no spent one single penny on baby clothes or kids clothes. Not one. You can tell cos they're tagged. "The boys thrilled with their #Hunter wellies" Er no 5 year old has ever been thrilled with Hunter wellies ever in the history of the world.

Original poster
Hmmmmx100 · 26/08/2017 11:49

And they can actually afford Hunter wellies, that's what annoys me.

OP posts:
JackietheBackie · 26/08/2017 12:06

I don't like the commodification of their children's lives. The children don't have a choice and might not want their photos plastered over the internet. Saying that, although I am aware of the phenomenon (and especially the midwife as I am friends with people who know her and have worked with her IRL), I don't actually follow any of them.

TheLegendOfBeans · 26/08/2017 12:08

Insta stories of Clinking champagne glasses in beach clubs that are the French equivalent of Blackpool. Unfollow

Saucer of milk for FANTINE over there Grin Grin Wink

ElspethFlashman · 26/08/2017 12:08

Another thing that grinds my gears is the whole tagging baby clothes and baby products with the "supporting #smallbusiness" excuse. It may make you feel noble, but your feed is still just an advertising channel, love, you're not Mother Theresa.

It's all done ostensibly in the name of "supporting other women". But it just makes you into a magazine, essentially.

HelloSquirrels · 26/08/2017 12:09

I can't get het up about it. I can't say that if I had the same opportunity that I wouldn't take it.

HelloSquirrels · 26/08/2017 12:14

And all this sisterhood thing is shit. If you really believed in the "sisterhood" you'd be nothing but pleased for them regardless of how they have come by their success.

FANTINE2 · 26/08/2017 12:18

Legend,
I can understand what prompts you to make that remark but honestly most French people would not be seen dead there.
Not jealousy on my part. It just makes me smile at how people try to put across an image of a perfect life.

ElspethFlashman · 26/08/2017 12:32

I do get a bit jealous sometimes. Mainly of the holidays and weekends away and experiences they get.

There's one Mum (the "zany" one) who has spent the whole summer either at festivals paid for by sponsors or on beach holidays paid by sponsors. And today I see she's at another festival sponsored by booking.com. The kids must be having an amazing summer. My kids haven't had a holiday at all this year. Sad

Arsenicinthesugarbowl · 26/08/2017 12:35

I have got quite into some of these instamummies lately although I'm a bit older than most of them I reckon. but it is all a cynical PR exercise. It's a job and they do it well.....bought a few things on dress like a mum (she looks great). My husband burst out laughing when he saw me and my daughter said I looked like a parrot!
They need to be aspirational otherwise no one would watch them!
But I also dislike the "I'm just like you" but a casually tousled version and just a bit better. I don't want them to be like me-I like the escapism. I do wonder about the ethics of using kids to make money though. My youngest is 10 and has been very clear she doesn't want pictures of herself on facebook etc
But they are a tiny part of my instagram and I'm a fickle bugger so they might be gone soon.

eyebrowsonfleek · 26/08/2017 12:35

My teen dd used to watch a family vlogger on YouTube and I said to her imagine if the child grows up and asks the parents to take down all of the videos. What will the parents do to earn money?
I personally think that it will become a future source of conflict in the family. We know the full name of the children and have access to photos/video of them doing all sorts. Future employers/friends/boyfriends/bullies/teachers all watching videos of you having a bath, arguing with your sibling... I think that many Instamums will end up with kids who feel the same. They will not want their classmates seeing them model Hunter Welles when others are in Nikes and will be mortified when their friends are old enough to share said photos.

ElspethFlashman · 26/08/2017 12:36

I forgive the Flex one a lot just because of her changing room horrors in Instastories. She has shown herself bursting out of stuff in H&M. I've been that ashen faced postpartum soldier. I felt the solidarity there a bit.

(Mind you, her advertising power is insane and she'd be blind not to have thought about that. She said who she got her rings from in one Instastories and the jeweller got a massive massive bump in followers literally overnight!)

Imchangingmyname · 26/08/2017 13:17

For all her freebies etc, the midwife seems to have a huge chip on her shoulder, hence all the spouting off on Instagram if someone disagrees with her or questions her. I expect the husband is rather henpecked.

NoCapes · 26/08/2017 13:21

I used to really like the midwife and her husband too but it seemed overnight she changed
Now it's just ad ad holiday event ad ad event holiday ad ad - her children hardly even feature on her feed anymore
He's still quite funny but I find his captions too long and rambly now and he definitely knows he's funny which makes him unfunny now iyswim
I also agree that he's a bit hen pecked