NDN, shared driveway and bin - aibu?

[sailorcherries]

I've posted about my NDNs before and how they let their dog run through our garden (new build and fence/garden gate isn't completed yet), in to our house and pee on our front and back grass.

I've let that slide, while being annoyed, but this level of pettyness takes the piss. NDNs have a bigger and wider drive than us (see picture), and usually park both cars side by side.
DP and I park one behind the other, as is the only way on our drive. Our driveway is quite narrow and so I'd park further over, but still on my drive, to ensure DS7 could open his door without banging it off the side of the house and to let me open thw other door enough to get the car seat for our newborn in and out. This meant me standing for a minute or two on the top of both possibly with one foot in their drive a foot in mine, with the door opening over theirs. They have never had an issue and have regularly walked on our drive if needed, to retrieve stuff from the passenger side of their car.

NDN has now taken to putting her bin right on the border of both drives (see purple box) meaning I need to park further over to open the car seat side door properly, leaving DS7 little room to get out without my door scraping across the wall. She has actually witnessed DS trying to squash out as a result of this.

Now I've mever got annoyed at their dog, never been an arse about them walking over our drive, them having slabs sitting half on their drive and half on ours.

Am I being unreasonable to be quite annoyed and this fairly obvious, and petty, blockade over a pretty non issue?

They work full time and I'm on mat leave until after Christmas, so if there is damage I'll be able to prpvide evidence before they even know about it.

Put up CCTV facing your car but make sure it can see the boundary/bins so if they fall and damage your car you have proof.

I'd call the warden for the dog

It helps if you try and understand why they are doing it. You're assuming that they have moved their bins simply out of spite and pettiness but it is their way of telling you that you are doing something that is annoying them. It's not the stepping a foot down on their driveway which they object to it's you coming in and out down the side of their house probably multiple times a day. Their side might literally be a driveway but they don't use it as a driveway, it is their side access. They feel you're invading their privacy.

Yes, I would find it intrusive if you pulled up next to my toilet window and stood there for a few minutes sorting out children, unloading shopping etc. if I was trying to have a poo in peace. And then you're encroaching even closer by using their space.

But as you say, it's your drive and you will continue to park there as they can't stop you but don't be surprised if they make it difficult for you. You may be entitled to but that doesn't mean they don't find it annoying. Just like it's their land and you can't stop them putting the bins there. A fence would be the best solution for them to give them some privacy and stop their dog getting on to your land but if that isn't possible then 3ft high planters with small trees or bushes would also do the job and create some privacy and you wouldn't have any grounds to object.

As for the dog, you have the power to stop it coming in your garden by putting up a gate but instead of just doing that you are documenting how many times it pisses and getting annoyed about it.

Yes, I would find it intrusive if you pulled up next to my toilet window and stood there for a few minutes sorting out children, unloading shopping etc.

Then you would be mad to buy a house with this driveway layout!

Agree though about the fences though OP. I'd put every spare penny into fencing/gating off your entire property.

And I'd still phone the warden about their dog

Unfortunately at the time we moved we didn't have money to fully fence the garden, we prioritised the sides to give our neighbours privacy. We are getting the final side fenced and a gate installed in October.

However if I decided I never wanted that it shouldn't be a reason for them to not control their dog. Why should I fork out because she has an unsupervised dog? It also isn't going to stop them letting the dog piss on the front grass or minimise the chance of it running in the front door when I open that.

If they want to install a fence on their side of their drive then so be it, however if it removed the border between driveways then they'd need my permission as it could cause damage to my drive.

Why buy a house with a shared/joint drive, knowing the other property needs to use the full length of theirs, if you want that area to be private?

And why does their annoyance mean they can step on my drive to put the bin border there, step on my drive to let her child out the car (which she did last night after her rant at my dad) and so on, but I cannot occasionally step on theirs?

If they had spoke to us about any issues I wouldn't be as frustrated. It's the pettyness from someone who is, almost, 1.5x my age and seems to think DP and I are pushovers as we are younger/have a smaller house.

Fence it off. No arguments then.

As for the dog, you have the power to stop it coming in your garden by putting up a gate - Yourmywife the onus is on the owner of the dog to stop it being a nuisance, not on the neighbour.

OP is going to fence it

YANBU. They sound very petty and oblivious to the double-standards at play here. I would have a polite word with them about the bin, while having your own complaints ready in your arsenal - but be wary using them as liklihood is you'll be living alongside them for many years and I know personally how shit it is to have bad feeling with NDN.
Is there any chance you could put up a roll of temporary fencing to keep their dog out in the meantime? Just some chickenwire wound around stakes or something while waiting on a permanent borderline?
Good fences do indeed good neighbours make!

And why does their annoyance mean they can step on my drive to put the bin border there, step on my drive to let her child out the car

For god's sake woman - speak to them yourself instead of sending your dad round!
Then you can ask them the above question yourself!
They want to see how much of a pushover you are!

for proof, you may need cctv otherwise it's your word against theirs.

The dog aspect of this is a no brainer. It is their resposibility to fence it IN, not yours to fence it out. You certainly have every right to object to it coming onto your property if that's something you don't want happening.

As for the driveway double standards, I'd tell them straight that if they don't want you stepping a solitary foot on theirs under any circumstances then the same applies to them with yours (I have a major problem with double standards)

sending daddy around to sort problems won't help then will it

Be an adult, knock on their door explain you don't want any annimosity and talk to them about the issues on both sides.

Nothing will be resolved by petty point scoring on both sides

but I cannot occasionally step on theirs?

You can. Continue to do so as necessary. Move their bins as often as you need to. Every time they complain remind them of their dog and themselves stepping into your property.

On a practical side Halfords do clear bump strips that go on the edge of your door so it doesn't chip it. (I had to get some) it's well worth doing as the paint gets chipped and rusts if it's left.
If you don't like those you could stick a section of pipe insulation to the edge of your house so the door bumps into that.

Yanbu about your dickhead neighbours though.

Thank you for the clear bump advice.

As for sending my dad around, you are all mistaken.
I had my oldest out at a club and my dad watched my youngest. He was in the garden when NDN moved bin nunber 2 and he asked her what the issue was (the NDNs had previously lived near my parents, knew them and had been friendly when they had spoken) which is why my dad thought he'd ask.

Before you condescend someone over the internet, please do make sure the facts are right.

She actually appeared yesterday on her drive, after speaking to my dad, caught my eye and quickly went inside before I could get out the car. I'm just going to leave them to their pettyness and of the dog sniffs round my garden then I'll let them know exactly how things land.