Just wondering what people think of this?

[lily88]

Myself and DH went out last night together first time since our baby was born 6 months ago mil has offered to babysit for a while often minds other grandchildren although they're older. We dropped a fed and changed DD over at 8:00 and we got back after midnight. DD was still in the car seat even though we'd also brought her carry cot. MIL said she didn't want to disturb DD and how she didn't want to even look at her in case DD started screaming for us. AIBU to be upset that not once mil held her, cuddled her and just left her in the one spot for 4 hours? DD was fine but I just feel sad she was just left there and sounds like she wasn't interacted with either.

It's not clear from your post if she was asleep the whole time?
If she was then mil was not unreasonable at all (although why you left baby in the car seat before you left is slightly odd).
If baby was awake and crying and ignored then obviously yanbu...

Was she awake or asleep? Not great to be in the car seat for such a long time

DD wasn't asleep and mil basically pushed us out the door saying you'll be late.

Yeah I wouldn't let MIL look after her again (if you can call completely ignoring her for 4 hours 'looking after her')

Car seat guidelines def don't agree with 4 hours in one!!
And how can a gm not have wanted to get her out and CUDDLE HER FFS???

Sounds very odd.

Was DD asleep when you came back? Had she fallen asleep soon after you left and mil didnt want to disturb her?

She was asleep when we got back. She fell asleep around 9:30.

I would not be happy she was curled in a car seat for 4 hours but maybe she doesn't know it's not good for them

WTF?!

I can almost understand if she was asleep before you got there. If she wasn't, and MIL left her just there in the seat and didn't even make eye cotnact - . There's no way she'd be babysitting again.

That's even before you get to safety and comfort. Four hours in a car seat must have been pretty damn uncomfortable and I think you bringing the cot and her not putting two and two together there is pretty crap. Poor DD. And, curled in a car seat asleep for so long, at 6 months - I hope to god she was checking on her breathing etc. Sounds as if she wouldn't have been though.

Lesson learned OP!

Not ideal to leave baby in car seat so long, they probably weren't aware of the harm in that.

There is no way they could have ignored her for 90mins I think they mean once she fell asleep they were scared to look at her.

Sounds like they were nervous and didn't want to ruin your first night out so trying to avoid any issues.

I am sure as their confidence grows and once you and dh explain how you would like her to be looked after this will change.