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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to think kids shouldn't sit on the tube

107 replies

JSBF · 16/08/2017 17:24

I get on the London tube every day to get too and from work always during rush hour. There will often be little kids on the tube too. Am i being unreasonable to think that small kids (i'm talking small enough to be carried) shouldn't have a whole seat to themselves, when they could sit on a parents lap? The other day a lady plonked her 1/2 year old on the seat and then the baby decided to crawl on to her lap and she said "aw you can never tell if they'll want their own seat or not" and kept her on her lap so she could then breastfeed, but kept the baby's belongings on the seat so people couldn't sit down meanwhile there are people standing who could be using that seat.

I think what is most annoying is that the kids sit down, climb up on the seat, get down from the seat so clearly aren't interested in sitting down so it's not like they're tired/want to rest. I am not saying kids should have to stand on the tube, as I get that they're too tiny in the crowded carriages and they'll get tired easily, but is it unreasonable to think, if they can, that the parents should let them sit on their lap so someone else who might need it can take the seat instead?

OP posts:
Macarena1990 · 16/08/2017 18:10

Freedom passes held by those living in london boroughs are valid for free travel on the tube as well as the bus

toastedsarniefiend · 16/08/2017 18:10

Bags on a seat is 100% different to a child on a seat.

You have no idea of any circumstances regarding the parent and their ability to have a child on their lap.

After having my knee operated on I couldn't have mine on my lap for ages as she would constantly knock my stitches for example.

I will always put my child on a seat if I can as most people travelling on the tube don't look and just shove to get on and they often think they see a space when it's a small child and try to shove their way into it.

AntiHop · 16/08/2017 18:11

My nearly 3 year old hates to sit on my lap on the tube, and has done for a long time. So if there is space, she has her own seat. If the tube gets busy, and there is adults standing, I can't move her to my lap as she'd kick off. I'll do what I need to in order to avoid a tantrum on the tube.

Let's face it, it's more likely that it's women who are accompanying young children on the tube. So attitudes like the op are one of the reasons women may feel uncomfortable on public transport. Children have just as much right to take up space as anyone.

LostInShoebiz · 16/08/2017 18:11

I did address your point by noting pensioners don't travel free on the tube.

EyeHalveASpellingChequer · 16/08/2017 18:12

Freedom passes don't cover tube journies

Yes they do.

Rageintotheblight · 16/08/2017 18:12

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Haint · 16/08/2017 18:13

What if those small children left home early that morning and have had a long, tiring day sightseeing and will have a long walk home from the station at the other end?

Presumably lots of people who've been at work all day will have spent much of it sitting down?

Nuttynoo · 16/08/2017 18:17

Coming home saw a woman who refused to put her 3 yo dd on her lap as she would kick off while a pregnant women practically begged her for a seat (feeling faint). Pregnant lady passed out, thankfully a guy caught her, and the entire train was delayed as she was removed. The lady was yelled at by the other passengers and removed herself and her child from the train. Pointless exercise. The child should have been removed asap.

Brittbugs80 · 16/08/2017 18:19

The other day a lady plonked her 1/2 year old on the seat and then the baby decided to crawl on to her lap and she said "aw you can never tell if they'll want their own seat or not

A six month old was sat on her own seat then crawled onto Mom? I'd actually be impressed to see that!

Brittbugs80 · 16/08/2017 18:19

The other day a lady plonked her 1/2 year old on the seat and then the baby decided to crawl on to her lap and she said "aw you can never tell if they'll want their own seat or not

A six month old was sat on her own seat then crawled onto Mom? I'd actually be impressed to see that!

CockneyRhymer · 16/08/2017 18:22

I also babywear and have a 3yo who can't hold on yet (and we do travel at rush hour to get to work/nursery), so she gets her own seat, and if there's only 1 I will stand with the baby. She quite often sits on the floor though as everyone pretends we don't exist, even when she's shouting 'mummy I can't hold on!'

I'd rather some of the men in their 30s & 40s gave up their seats for the elderly instead of pretending they don't exist either.

But if it's just the 2 of us I will have the toddler on my lap. The priority seats are for 'those less able to stand' which includes the under 5s in my book.

BasketOfDeplorables · 16/08/2017 18:23

I think the 1/2 year old was either 1 or 2, not half a year.

LittleBooInABox · 16/08/2017 18:24

Get over yourself op. First come first serve. Parent could have condition and pain that makes having child sat on lap hard.

rupertpenryswife · 16/08/2017 18:26

Only on MN do you see this rubbish, I would ensure my DC stood for the elderly, pregnant or disabled otherwise I think they are fully entitled to sit.

G1ggleloop · 16/08/2017 18:26

I have three small children who are safer sitting down. If it's busy then one sits on my lap and the other two share a seat. If it's really busy then the littlest gets the seat with one of her siblings and the other stands up with me. It's just common courtesy to not take up more room than you really need. Although having said that I find people often offer us all seats when we get on but my eldest prefers to stand anyway.

CockneyRhymer · 16/08/2017 18:27

It's always women with children who have to give way, isn't it? I'm sure there are lots of other people on the tube who could gove up their seats if they looked up from their phones for a bloody second (and I am scrupulous about seat giving up when not woman-handling 2 kids btw).

Ummmmgogo · 16/08/2017 18:27

please be careful when offering elderly people seats. I know a lovely older gentleman who was devastated that the other passengers considered him 'an old codger (his words not mine!!!)

If someone has a bag on the seat i normally just ask them to move the bag. no-one has ever said no!

LuLuuuuuuu · 16/08/2017 18:29

I would, and have in the past, moved her bags .

LuLuuuuuuu · 16/08/2017 18:32

My DNan would agree with BewareOfDragons . Used to say they have been at school all day, let them rest their legs . Then again she went out long before school was out for the day and could never understand those whom were out during school bus hours and had all day to go get their shopping etc (Nan was retired by then )

bridgetoc · 16/08/2017 18:33

YABU......

ForalltheSaints · 16/08/2017 18:33

Sit down quietly is fine by me, not being noisy and running around.

Alittlepotofrosie · 16/08/2017 18:34

Whoever gets there first gets the seat unless someone who actually needs it turns up. I dont necessarily think a child should always stand up for an adult. On a busy train i would think children are safer sitting down.

Brittbugs80 · 16/08/2017 18:44

I think the 1/2 year old was either 1 or 2, not half a year

Aahh I did wonder!

Mittens1969 · 16/08/2017 18:45

I was only making a comparison. Nobody would ever dare to say that elderly people should stand on buses and nor should they. Same with children, and a pp has pointed out that it can be hard for children to stand on the tube.

In the op's scenario the parent had put a bag on the seat next to her, that wasn't on.

YellowPaisley · 16/08/2017 18:45

ObviousPretzel had the nail on the head

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