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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

AIBU to feel the tiniest bit spied on? (Sort of lighthearted. Well, a bit.)

73 replies

BaggypantsCrimplesnitch · 15/08/2017 20:13

Relatively recently we moved to a much more rural location than before, and my DH, being a techie type, put CCTV cameras up all over the place in the garden so we could look out for wildlife, particularly at night - we see deer, various birds, hedgehogs, etc, which is all very nice. However, he can access these cameras remotely via the Internet, and often he'll get home from work and say something like, "Pleased to see you getting on with some weeding today!" or, "Where were you off to in the car then?" I know he doesn't mean anything by it, and I'm probably being over sensitive, but it makes me feel a little bit intruded on, if that makes sense?

Interested to know how other MNetters would feel about it.

OP posts:
MumIsRunningAMarathon · 15/08/2017 20:15

I would hate that!

Were they his idea? Did he source/pay for/fit them?

PollyFlint · 15/08/2017 20:15

I would hate it if my partner did this. Creepy and weird.

I'd love a wildlife camera though

kittytom · 15/08/2017 20:16

My DH once set up an internet camera to track our cat who had gone missing. When he said as a joke 'didn't leave the house til 11am I see' I also felt spied on and didn't like it one bit!

Anecdoche · 15/08/2017 20:16

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

WrittenandGrown · 15/08/2017 20:16

I would hate this.

silkybear · 15/08/2017 20:18

Massively uncomfortable. If it is for wildlife he has no reason to access it in the day especially during work time. Is he controlling in other ways? You mention going more rural, is this further away from your friends and family? It would be a red flag for me and I would have a serious chat with him.

AnneBiscuit · 15/08/2017 20:18

I would hate that. I'd unplug the ethernet cable from the machine if I were you.

Trb17 · 15/08/2017 20:20

Nope nope nope. Feels creepy to me.

WhooooAmI24601 · 15/08/2017 20:21

Nope I'd hang pantaloons on the front of each one to prevent his nonsense.

acornsandnuts · 15/08/2017 20:23

I would arrange for a hunky tradesman to call then after he's left wander outside in your dressing gown looking satisfied.

reallybadidea · 15/08/2017 20:23

You think that is bad, my friend has wireless bathroom scales which her DH gets notifications from and has been known to comment on Shock

TheresTheFlyingFuckIDontGive · 15/08/2017 20:27

Some sort of lens cap over the cameras is what's needed here. Hopefully with a picture of an extended middle finger on the side facing the camera.

caffeinestream · 15/08/2017 20:29

I would be turning them off.

MaisieDotes · 15/08/2017 20:31

"Pleased to see you getting on with some weeding today!"

Shock

I think my eyebrows would levitate off the top of my head if I heard this from DH. After that he would need to run away from me as fast as he could to avoid injury.

NoFuckingRoomOnMyBroom · 15/08/2017 20:34

That is stalkerish behaviour & I would feel really uncomfortable that he was doing it.

RelaxMax · 15/08/2017 20:37

Really really odd. I would turn them off.

vvviola · 15/08/2017 20:38

DH did this a few times after we got our cameras installed and he was away. I'm pretty sure it was just the novelty of having the cameras.

So one evening I propped a piece of paper up in front of one with a smiley face on it. I got a text about an hour later (when he'd clearly got out of the conference he was at) saying "point taken :) wasn't intending to spy".

I think he just got carried away by the new gadget! I don't think he's done it since.

indigox · 15/08/2017 20:39

YANBU. There's no way I'd be going along with this, turn them off. Why is he watching you whilst at work!?

user7841794168 · 15/08/2017 20:39

Why don't you just switch the camera off when he's at work?

youarenotkiddingme · 15/08/2017 20:40

Yeah very odd.

user7841794168 · 15/08/2017 20:41

You think that is bad, my friend has wireless bathroom scales which her DH gets notifications from and has been known to comment on shock

Bloody hell, that's well into LTB territory IMO.

Flybye · 15/08/2017 20:41

Make there isn't a load of them indoors too Shock

CheshireChat · 15/08/2017 20:41

I think I would've stabbed DP with the secateurs Shock.

I wouldn't like it either, but could you troll him and do lots of inexplicable things that you deny afterwards?

Flybye · 15/08/2017 20:41

*sure

Starlighter · 15/08/2017 20:42

I'd hate that! I'd have to turn them off...

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