I've just been fat shamed by a 4 year old

[Mooey89]

'Why do mummies have to have such huge massive fat tummies?'

Along with helpful cunt exMIL this morning chirpily 'I am a bit worried about how much you want another baby, are you sure you aren't too fat to conceive now?'

Luckily last week I had an epiphany and I have been back to my diet 100% this week, but I do have 4 stone to lose.

Please can you cheer me up with similar tales of child honesty???

I'm just focusing on the time aged 6 that I told DM that she smelt like wet dog... 🙈

You shouldn't eat that mummy you're already fat. (Whilst eating a bar of chocolate)
Needless to say I'm curbing my "weight talk" around my 4yo DS.

Just remembered my niece when she was about three or four said really loudly to her gran when she went in a cubicle in the busy ladies toilet in Debenhams, "wow why have you got a beard on your bum???"

Me to friend of my mother in 1966, "My mummy said your husband left you because you are really horrible".
My mother never lived it down Never confide in a four year old.

DS3 (aged 4) insists that I smell like my MIL
When DS1 was 6 he announced at a family dinner that I said my SIL's mother was weird. I was sitting next to her. She was not impressed.

I had braces as an adult. Cue young relatives 'can we see your ugly mouth again' every time they saw me 🙈🙈🙈

Two spring to mind. In year 2 Asperger son who is very literal and has no social filter told the fat girl in his class she was too fat and ate too much (they were doing food). Cue the conversation about how that might hurt her feelings etc. Two weeks later he proudly jumped in the car and told me he had told her she needed to exercise more. 'What?!??!? I didn't say she was fat!!!' Made even worse by the fact it was my exes daughter

The other was when he was about 4 and talking about boobies. Asking when he might get them. I explained but boys don't get boobies, just girls.

'But Papa has them.....'

Aged grandfather. He does!

One of my teachers told us about her son aged 5-6. She gave him an envelope to give to a nun, we'll call her Sister P, in the local convent. She sat outside in the car until he came out.
On his return, she asked him "Did you give it to Sister P?"
"I don't know. It was a nun but I don't know if it was Sister P."
"Well, what did she look like?"
"She had brown hair and a nice flat face"
"What do you mean by a flat face"
"You know. It looks flat"
Teacher, puzzled, asked "Well, do I have a flat face?
Her son scrutinised her face and said "It is flat in some places. But it's crumpled in other places"

When I was little I really bollocked a big tattooed man for drawing on himself with his felt tips. Apparently he found it hilarious while my mum waited for the ground to swallow her up. I also told my mum I wasn't too big for my buggy, look that man's got one (it was a wheelchair).

I, only this morning, was informed by my 3 year old that I have very long boobs too!! My 5 year old asked me once what all the cracks around my eyes are???

When I was 5 and in 1st year of primary school..The Secretary came in to the classroom to give the teacher information or some papers or something and after she left the room I said "she's so fat" or very similar...the woman was I think quite large, but thankfully she didn't hear me say it. The teacher did though and I'm sure I got told off/disciplined 😶😶😶

Many years ago, I was shopping once and a young mum (very pretty, blonde and willowy) with a small boy in a buggy (no idea how old he was), stopped to have a look at a dress. She'd have looked great in it.

Suddenly, a stentorian voice issued from the buggy:
"You're NOT buying that, are you, Mummy?"
"Why, don't you think it'd suit me?"
"No. You're too OLD." He didn't quite add "drive on" but it was implied.

Break out the crimplene then.

Bugaboo

Grandma Goat

My nephew (five years old) asked me if I'd fallen over and hit my face because of my two black eyes.

No, darling, they're from getting old,hard work, lack of sleep, lack of money, self-loathing, drinking too much, not eating enough vegetables, not getting enough sunlight, staring at a screen all day.

But thanks for your concern you little bastard

Me, aged 7, having raced my dad's friend at swimming and won

"Wow Mike, you've gone really red in the face. My dad says that's because you drink and smoke so much"

What a little shit I was.

DS: What's that for mummy?
Me: It's moisturiser to get rid of my wrinkles
DS: You need to put more on

My DM often reminds me of the time she returned home from having a perm and I said 'nice hat Mummy'. I think that one might have resulted in tears.

Another thread has just reminded me of another faux pas from my youth.

I was staying with my aunt for the weekend. They lived on a social housing estate. When my DM came to pick me up, she found me filthy and running up and down the street. I was having a lovely time. DM asked me if I'd enjoyed myself, to which I replied 'yes Mummy, but they are a bit rough around here'. Luckily my aunt thought it was hilarious but I still cringe about it.

When I was in my 20s I was walking to work, smoking a cigarette. A man was walking towards me taking his small daughter to school. As they approached, she pointed at me and shouted, "You're going to DIE!"
I suppose she had a point, but it was a bit of a shock. I've finally quit smoking though, so maybe I'll live a little longer.

My son, 4, can't get his head around the idea that men wear their hair long and tie it back (despite his Godfather having had hair like that all his life!). We were in Tesco's at the till, and the man on the till had a ponytail. DS announced "there is a lady man with a tail!"

I desperately tried to explain that it was a man with long hair, but DS insisted he was a lady-man - almost to the point of tantrum.

I have made sure that we don't go to his till since...

And we were in Lidl and the security guard had a go at me because I had let DS eat a doughnut while walking round - it keeps him quiet! - and after that DS would always refer to the security guard as "that nasty man" and blow raspberries at him. We don't shop there anymore either.

My DD is 2, so we're just entering this phase!

She likes to pull peoples tops up, slap their tummies, and shout FAT BELLY FAT BELLY, and wobble wobble.
Likewise she likes to slap peoples bums and shout FAT BUM.
She asks everyone if she can see their boobies, including men.

Also, DD's great aunt is in a wheelchair. When we were shopping recently, she went absolutely tonto at a random woman in a wheelchair shouting 'NOOOOO THATS MY AUNT CHAIR!!! GET OUT!!!' Being swallowed up by the ground would have been really welcome then, she went red in the face and all sorts. Raging she was.

My 6 year old niece asked me why all adults had tiny little holes on their noses.

😂Grandma Goat !
I was on the tube once in Italy and an old lady (yep - not even a 4 yr old !) got up to offer me her seat gesturing to my tummy - I wasn't pregnant 😳- I was wearing trousers with a yoga type waistband and was a bit round in the tummy but I didn't think it was that bad - aagh ! Had to say no no I'm not pregnant in halting Italian - it took ages to convince her - I should have probably just sat in her seat and shut up !!! Never forgot it and got rid of the trousers !

'Mummy why is that man walking like this??' Asked very loudly by DD aged about 3.5 What followed was her imitating a man using a zimmer frame who had some form of disability that caused quite an exaggerated gait. Actually wanted the ground to open up and swallow me . Thankfully said man took it in very good humour and just laughed and explained his legs didn't work well. In those initial moments after she did it though I think I died a little inside. We had a serious chat afterwards though about talking about out her people etc 🙈

2 issues - 1) totally out of order for ex mil 2) but unkind from 4 year old but they do say that kind of stuff have a fellow mum friend who is extremely slim whose DS said "haven't you got a fat bum mummy" nothing could be further from the truth - they perhaps just need to be told it's a bit unkind but I doubt in anyway malicious like in case of exMIl

When it comes to disability, I think a lot of people find children's honesty refreshing. I am more than happy to explain a particular something in my life to a child who asks, than I am to see a parent shooing their child away and pretending they haven't seen. The former at least makes me feel visible/ not a freak!

Please don't be embarrassed if your children do this!

4yr old DD "you have a nose like the man of despicable me" it's a bit of a honk with a bump but not that bad!!!