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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To be super pissed off

66 replies

Confused95 · 13/08/2017 10:17

Yesterday i was guilted into watching a friends child 7yr old. She said it would be a hour or two when it was five. I have two small children of my own. Ds 3 and dd 1 this child kept taking my childrens toys from them and saying they wont share, he only wanted they toys they had. My ds has a fav toy its a power ranger he always has and hardly ever leaves down but since yesterday we can find it. Iv tore the house and garden apart. I can go buy the same one no problem today and ds will be happy but iv a strange feeling that boy took it as he kept lifting it away from ds. No point saying to his mum shes one of them my child is perfect and dose no wrong parents. Now when she collected her ds she implayed that il be watching him again as in her words she works and i dont as im a stay at home mum. Aibu if i just say f**k no pay a childminder and teach him some manners and not to steal. She said come school starting again il be able to get him from school and such. Hes not a plesent child. She tells him daily hes better than other children and he can do as he wants cause she says so. Shes not very plesent herself. Likes to talk down about others and tells people how to live their lives

OP posts:
BlueIsYou · 13/08/2017 10:19

Honestly OP, just say "That won't woke for me, I'm sorry. You'll have to find other arrangements".

Repeat if necessary

LindyHemming · 13/08/2017 10:19

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

BlueIsYou · 13/08/2017 10:19

*work

Notreallyarsed · 13/08/2017 10:20

Why is she your friend if she speaks to you like shit and won't deal with her child's behaviour? I'd let the friendship fizzle out and also refuse to have her child in the house again, whether she's there or not.

formerbabe · 13/08/2017 10:20

I'd send her a non confrontational text asking if her child accidentally took home the toy?

As for future requests for babysitting, just say no... honestly!

BlondeB83 · 13/08/2017 10:21

Jut say no! It doesn't sound like a friendship worth having either!

DressedCrab · 13/08/2017 10:21

I wouldn't wait for a next time - make it clear now that you won't be doing it again.

NerrSnerr · 13/08/2017 10:22

I'd call her and ask if he took the toy home by accident and just say no if she asks you to care for the child again.

Justgivemesomepeace · 13/08/2017 10:23

I can't imagine the phrase 'no that doesn't work for me' is language that kind of person relates to. I would say 'no chance it was a nightmare last time , I'm not doing it. You'll have to sort something else out.'

witchofzog · 13/08/2017 10:23

Disengage with her now. She brings nothing to your life. And call her out on the Power Ranger toy too.

Whosthemummynow · 13/08/2017 10:23

Oh I see.... She WORKS.

troodiedoo · 13/08/2017 10:27

I'd be tempted to drop in and look for power ranger.

But other than that, ditch her she sounds like a rubbish friend.

Aquamarine1029 · 13/08/2017 10:27

Good grief, I do hope you have enough of a backbone to say NO to this woman if she asks you to watch her son again. You don't owe her a damn thing.

MerlinsLeftButtock · 13/08/2017 10:28

Definitely ask if he's 'accidentally' taken the toy home. And I agree with a pp, don't bother being polite about not having him again.

GaryNumanIsOlderThanGaryOldman · 13/08/2017 10:29

Ask her for the power ranger. Heavily imply he took it.
Chances are she will be so appalled/mortally offended that you can have a huge row and problem solved.
HTH

Confused95 · 13/08/2017 10:34

Im going to text today and tell her i wont be watching him again. If i say about the toy she will tell everyone we know i accused her ds of stealing. According to her being a single mum of two small children isnt work.

OP posts:
Brighteyes27 · 13/08/2017 10:40

Agree totally with formerbabe.

Although she sounds the type to deny it but at least she'll know her DS is a thief.

Some people have so much brass neck it's unbelievable and won't think twice about putting their needs above the needs of others.

GeillisTheWitch · 13/08/2017 10:44

^ What Notreallyarsed said. She's a shit friend and I wouldn't have anything to do with her or her brat. Stop doing her favours and she'll leech on to someone else quickly enough.

ClemDanfango · 13/08/2017 10:47

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

DancesWithOtters · 13/08/2017 10:50

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Fairenuff · 13/08/2017 10:52

How are you going to word the text? You need to be clear with her.

Regarding the toy - rather than take it, he may have hidden it. Under beds and pillows, behind/under sofa, bottom of wardrobe are typical child hiding places.

justilou · 13/08/2017 10:56

Ring her up and let her know that your kid hasn't slept without his power ranger. You know that her kid has it as he was obsessed with it. Tell her you need it back asap. If it is not forthcoming, she will need to find other childcare arrangements. When you get it back, let her know that she will still need to make other arrangements as her kid is a shit.

ChasedByBees · 13/08/2017 10:57

Wow, you're not her staff. You're a stay at home mum to benefit your family, not hers. By you not having a income, your family has made sacrifices and adapts to benefit your children. You're not doing that so you can be the local childminder. I would also be blunt and tell her no, that you just don't want to look after her child as your children don't play well.

I would also ask about the toy. Who cares if she tells everyone you're accusing her child of stealing? If she wants to create drama like that, then you have a good reason to not mind her child ever again. It's your child's favourite toy so you have nothing to lose really.

Notreallyarsed · 13/08/2017 10:59

Also, the toy isn't in your house so you have a right to ask where it is. He needs to tell you either where he's hidden it (in your house) or where it is and return it.

troodiedoo · 13/08/2017 11:07

That is an excellent plan justilou