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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To think you don't accept a neighbours parcel if you are going away!

85 replies

User998877 · 07/08/2017 19:21

I had a parcel delivery today whilst we were out, I received a text to say it had been left with a neighbour (gave number of house and name). This would normally be fine but they told my DH at the weekend in passing that they are going away for a few days so I rushed home but they had left!

I am furious that they would accept someone's parcel knowing full well that they were going away. We are going away ourselves at the end of the week and the parcel contains holiday items and I have no bloody idea if they are going to be back before them Angry

OP posts:
Aquamarine1029 · 07/08/2017 19:30

I can't believe your neighbour would be so daft! That package could contain medication, WHO KNOWS, and they leave on holiday?! I would be very upset, too!

Original poster
User998877 · 07/08/2017 19:34

Aqua I said exactly the same to DH... idiots!

OP posts:
RaspberryPi1 · 07/08/2017 19:34

Yabu. If it was an urgent parcel you should have been in to collect it!

How were they supposed to know it was urgent/for your holiday.

TheNaze73 · 07/08/2017 19:35

YABU. They are not mind readers.

Original poster
User998877 · 07/08/2017 19:36

Rasp Who said it was urgent! Not me for sure, I ordered in plenty of time for it to arrive for the weekend.

I'm struggling to understand why anyone would accept a parcel knowing they wouldn't be around for a few days Confused

OP posts:
Papafran · 07/08/2017 19:36

Agree. YANBU. Also hate the way that delivery drivers always leave parcels with neighbours without checking that you want them to. My neighbour could be a thief for all they know. If I am not in, take it back to the depot and I will collect it myself. I also ask them to leave the parcel in the garden, but they normally refuse.

The other day, I was asked to take a package for a neighbour I had never met. The package was marked fragile. All was fine but I kept thinking what if whatever is inside is damaged and the delivery company deny liability and the neighbour thinks I did it.

Original poster
User998877 · 07/08/2017 19:38

But if you know you are going away why would you accept it in the first place... whether the parcel is urgent or not is irrelevant!

OP posts:
SpuriouserAndSpuriouser · 07/08/2017 19:38

Wtf why would you accept a parcel if you were just about to go on holiday? I would be pissed off too.

littlemisssweetness · 07/08/2017 19:39

Do they often take parcels for you? Ive done it before (was only away for a night tho) but we take parcels for them so regularly that it's like being on autopilot

Papafran · 07/08/2017 19:40

Yabu. If it was an urgent parcel you should have been in to collect it!

Yeah, so I have one of these things called a job, meaning that for most of the week I am not around for the 7am-9pm timeslot on an unspecified day that most delivery companies offer. So do many other people. The postal service is not just for people who are at home all the time. I have no problem with going somewhere to pick the parcel up if I am not in.

I would also never take a parcel in if I was going away (and often use this as an excuse to avoid taking parcels, although it's a bit embarrassing when they knock the next day and you're still there)

superking · 07/08/2017 19:41

Tbh I could see myself doing this - just because it wouldn't necessarily cross my mind when accepting the parcel.

RaspberryPi1 · 07/08/2017 19:42

If it's not urgent then a few days won't matter.

Maybe they thought they were being neighbourly.

Original poster
User998877 · 07/08/2017 19:44

They are both teachers and I work from home so it's normally me taking in parcels, this is the first time they've taken one for me. I would never dream of accepting one for them if I knew we weren't going to be around for a while for them to collect.

I'm honestly very Confused as to why they've taken it, as well as being very annoyed.

OP posts:
RaspberryPi1 · 07/08/2017 19:44

Ooh a job. I have one of those too. But my neighbours aren't my delivery service.

You can pay extra for weekend or evening delivery

Original poster
User998877 · 07/08/2017 19:48

Raspberry do read the thread please.

Whether the parcel is urgent is completely irrelevant, they told DH they are away for a few days, so here's an idea, don't take someone's property if you aren't going to be around to give it them.

OP posts:
hiphopcat · 07/08/2017 19:49

YANBU. I never accept parcels for anyone, and don't expect (or want) people to accept them for me. I don't apologise for it. It's my choice and I am entitled to feel that way.

Too many risks of the item becoming damaged and you getting the blame, or the recipient taking it from you and saying they never got it. Too much having to hang around waiting for them to come get it, or being forced to make conversation with people you can't be arsed with when they come get their package, or you go get yours.

I get on OK with the neighbours, and put my hand up and say 'hi' in passing several times a week, but we are not friends, and I don't want to take their packages in; nor do I want them taking mine in.

In addition, most of the time, I make sure I don't arrange for packages to be delivered when I am not in. And if it's not a courier delivery, my postman knows to put it in my garage if I am not in.

Re the OP, taking a package in when your were going away is just dumb.

Enidblyton1 · 07/08/2017 19:49

They just didn't think. You shouldn't be too annoyed with them. People are always being asked to take in parcels for neighbour's and just do it automatically, thinking they are doing you a favour.
I had the opposite problem last week. A courier tried to deliver my parcel about 4 days in a row and ended up dropping it off at a local depot instead. I couldn't believe that neither of my neighbours (who are both retired) or myself (who has been home every day, but in and out) managed to miss 4 deliveries!! So annoying!

It's just life with deliveries. Don't be annoyed with your neighbours.

MovingOnUpMovingOnOut · 07/08/2017 19:51

Yanbu. Someone once did to me. With wine. At Christmas AngryAngry

I had to go to Waitrose and everything in the end. And start a thread on here.

Original poster
User998877 · 07/08/2017 19:52

Raspberry are you deliberately trying to be goady!!

Why did I need to pay for next day delivery when I don't actually need the item until Friday, it was ordered in plenty of time for it to get here.

I am not a mind reader so didn't know which day it would arrive so had they declined to accept the parcel know they would not be around it would have been taken back to the depot, whereby I could have collected at my convenience.

OP posts:
hiphopcat · 07/08/2017 19:53

@EnidBlyton1

I couldn't believe that neither of my neighbours (who are both retired) or myself (who has been home every day, but in and out) managed to miss 4 deliveries!! So annoying!

Not really up to your neighbours to take in your deliveries is it? Confused

youarenotkiddingme · 07/08/2017 20:00

Rasp are you a) the neighbour MNing on holiday or b) just an arse?

Yanbu. You didn't ask them take it in so they have taken it (obviously trying to be helpful!) but caused you an issue.

Bumpins19 · 07/08/2017 20:00

I'm with Enidblyton1 on this - YANBU but, at the same time, I would cut them some slack as they probably took it without putting two and two together or while thinking 'Oh, I would hate to have to go all the way to the depot' while not thinking 'But actually I would prefer to do that than not be able to get my stuff for a good few days while we're away'. I definitely see how this is incredibly frustrating...but I could also see myself doing this while not concentrating.

PelorusJack · 07/08/2017 20:05

Do they have a cleaner or teens or kids at home who could have accepted the parcel without thinking. It's the type of thing that could easily happen in my house...

Original poster
User998877 · 07/08/2017 20:08

Just to clarify, I normally have no issue with taking in parcels for my neighbours since I'm normally around during the week. I also have no issues with the neighbours taking my parcel should I not be at home. As others have stated, it helps everyone out and no having to go to the depot.

The issue here is completely different, they have taken a parcel knowing full well they are going away... who would do that!

And to those saying they just accepted it without thinking, I don't buy that, they knew they were leaving less than an hour after accepting the parcel!

OP posts:
YouRat · 07/08/2017 20:09

I would break in and take what's mine !

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