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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

IsDHbu?!

79 replies

user1484937392 · 07/08/2017 16:08

Is DH bring unreasonable?
We have 2 DD's. Dd1 is 13. Dd2 is 12.
Dd2 has always been that kid that gets nits. No matter what we have done, she attracts them.
DH says it's now time that DD2 does her own hair as DD1 has been doing hers since she was 11. Like just going through it. Keeping ontop of it. I do the whole nit lotion thing but that every day she should go through it. Now DD2 can't even put her hair up in a pony tail properly. DH says I mother her too much. That DD2 expects me to do it all the time (which she does) so now DH has taken her phone away until she proves she can do her hair. I feel DH is BU sometimes. DD2 gets into a state about it and I do it as it's easier tbh. I'm not allowed to remind DD2 or tell her or help. She has to do it herself. She can go days without brushing her hair too. She starts YR8 in a brand new school in Sept so DH wants her to 'grow up' and take responsibility. Is he BU?!

OP posts:
dollydaydream114 · 08/08/2017 15:35

I'm dyspraxic so found stuff like putting my hair up hard when I was a kid BUT I was expected to keep practising. A 12-year-old who can't brush her hair and cries if she is asked to has got problems and yes, you are treating her like a baby. She is 12. Soon she'll be going on residential school trips and staying out for sleepovers. She needs to learn this basic stuff and she needs to learn it now.

I'm a bit puzzled that she seems to have nits permanently and obviously that's rotten, but nit treatment is a separate issue from a 12-year-old who can't brush and tie back her own hair.

CardsforKittens · 08/08/2017 15:52

She sounds quite a lot like my eldest, who does have ASD and is quite dyspraxic in some ways but can do other things quite well, e.g. can't brush her hair but can play the violin. Shorter hair helps her a lot.
Obviously I can't diagnose anyone, but I can point out that if your DD2 has dyspraxia your DH's solution simply won't work. A solution that could work (whether or not she has dyspraxia) is to sit with her twice a day any help her learn to do it herself.

lynmilne65 · 08/08/2017 20:21

Barstewart

lynmilne65 · 09/08/2017 07:03

Can't do a pt and am nearly 70
😳

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