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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

AIBU to think OH is a complete dick!?

90 replies

OMFL · 07/08/2017 03:31

So kids are playing in the garden with a selection of toys. I have 1 girl (6) and a boy (4). The boy goes towards the playhouse which happens to be pink and purple in colour. Its a toy house that opens up and comes with a load of stuff and characters. OH watches him and looses his rag sends him inside and says "you may aswell put a bloody dress on".
Boy comes in to me crying saying i dont want to wear a dress i was just playing. I try to stay calm but totally want to smash OH in the face for upsetting our son whilst innocently playing with what is fundamentally a toy house that just happens to be pink. I ask him what his problem is and he replieswith "when he gets battered when hes older for being a poof you can deal with it I'm outta here". Has anyone come across this where partners object to girly stuff or is it just me thats ended up with the nob from hell?

OP posts:
Alittlepotofrosie · 07/08/2017 07:02

So is he the father of your dc? If so poor kids. Even more so if you continue to inflict him on them.

AdalindSchade · 07/08/2017 07:03

Can you imagine what he will be like if your son does grow up to be gay?

kalinkafoxtrot45 · 07/08/2017 07:07

This surely can't be the first time he's been such a dickhead.

SleepFreeZone · 07/08/2017 07:08

Is he the children's father? I would say that's very extreme behaviour for such a nothing event. My son pushes his dolly around and pretends to give it boob. Man he'd have a heart attack watching that.

mmgirish · 07/08/2017 07:15

I would consider this a serious issue. I rarely comment on relationship type threads but this is terrible. It's not ok to speak like that in front of children. Does your husband have anger issues?

JuicyStrawberry · 07/08/2017 07:22

Grrr I hate men like this! Proper dickheads with their sons. The older your son gets the worse his dad will be with him.

MyRedPepper · 07/08/2017 07:58

YANBU and yes he is the 'nob of hell'.

As for LTB, I would actually consider it as this is the sign of such a HUGE difference between you two that I can't see how you will ever agree on how to raise your dc or how to live together in harmony.
I also suspect that his views re what is manly spreads to other areas such as who is taking the decisions, who has the final say, who does the HW etc....

bellasuewow · 07/08/2017 08:01

Come on op if you have been with him for years you must have had incidents like this before and you must know about his attitudes to women and gay people

CircleofWillis · 07/08/2017 09:15

This is an issue for your daughter's self esteem as well if your husband is negatively referring to 'girl's' activities and toys.

Notreallyarsed · 07/08/2017 09:18

Who even thinks like that let alone says it out loud to bully their own child? Fucking hell. Not on.

abbsisspartacus · 07/08/2017 09:22

My ex husband is like this now he is gone my daughter is getting a black bedroom and my youngest son is allowed pink cups even at school

Euripidesralph · 07/08/2017 10:09

Hell no ....his bags would be bloody well packed and on the doorstep arrogant wanker

I have a lot of issues with stbxdh but he never pulled that crap ....he's an ass

Get rid

missiondecision · 07/08/2017 10:13

Omg I know a family like this.
Yanbu. He is being a dick.

MrsQuim · 07/08/2017 10:14

Yawn

HCantThinkOfAUsername · 07/08/2017 10:18

What an absolute dick! My ds likes princess things, trolls etc and found its mainly older people that judge (my parents) but if dp said something like this he would be gone.

user1494409994 · 07/08/2017 10:18

My son likes to play with my daughters doll prams. She likes to play with his cars and busses. They are just toys. Your partner is a dick.

XJerseyGirlX · 07/08/2017 10:27

Aw what a horrible dad those poor kids have. Stupid, pig ignorant man

JaniceBattersby · 07/08/2017 10:46

If you allow your children to be exposed to this kind of homophobia then they (both of them) will likely grow up thinking that it's ok. What if either of them is gay? How would they feel k owing this is their dad's attitude to sexuality.

I'd be out of the door. Yes, they'll still see their dad but at least you will be able to look them in the face when they're older and say your challenge to his behaviour was leaving.

Purplefrogshoes · 07/08/2017 10:52

They are just toys. My ds who is two is currently pushing bing about in his pink toy pram Grin

He is being very unreasonable and abusive I would say

BlondeB83 · 07/08/2017 10:54

Your OH sounds like a complete bellend. Has he expressed his homophobic views before?

ohfourfoxache · 07/08/2017 10:57

He's a knob.

And he has already started to damage your son.

Get rid and fast.

leighdinglady · 07/08/2017 11:00

Homophobic and sexist - what a catch. People don't criticise girls for playing with 'boys toys' but then punish boys - because what boy would ever want to associate with being a 'girl'?!

My first LTB

Mustang27 · 07/08/2017 11:02

Please tell me you are joking??

This made me so unbelievably sad for you and your family. Your partner doesn't need to worry about the bullies out with your home he just has to look at himself.

PollytheDolly · 07/08/2017 11:02

Christ, that's bad. Sad

Original poster
OMFL · 07/08/2017 14:03

You are all absolutely correct about him. Yes he is their father and yes i wish i could LTB. I hate him.

OP posts: