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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Nasty friend AIBU to completely cut her out of my life

94 replies

Sophie333 · 01/08/2017 17:37

My only friend for over 10 years has sent me such a nasty spiteful text ive ever recieved literally fuming my OH is telling me not to lower myself to her super low levels i messaged her letting her know one of our friends is expecting a child she replies with this-Oh cool and oh well another girls life fucked from having a baby all your life's are jokes mate for the next 20 old years fuck that shit mum this mum that i want this I want that fuck off mate I won't my womb taken the fuck out or I'm getting my tubes tied at least my pussy is gonna be tight for life unlike women's with baby big sagging curtains fuck that that's why your men are always gonna cheat cause they want something tighter fact of life lol x - she actually had the audacity to leave a x at the end wtf what would you do i literally dont want nothing to do with her i dont need that sort of negativity and pure hatefulness in my life

OP posts:
StillDrivingMeBonkers · 01/08/2017 18:01

As said above, there is something much deeper rooted .... but it isn't your problem to sort out. I would let her d. I never see the point of a stand up row when you can just let it slide. Don't respond to her text, answer he phone calls or bother sending any more birthday cards, side line her on social media. Just smile and nod and keep walking if you see her IRL.

TheSockGoblin · 01/08/2017 18:05

Well, it's clearly been going on a long time and it sounds like you've done all that can be reasonably expected (and more!) to help her adjust to life and friendship changes.

I'd say based on your update you would not be unreasonable at all to call time on this friendship. You've given her enough chances!

ConstanceCraving · 01/08/2017 18:06

She sounds a nightmare.

Original poster
Sophie333 · 01/08/2017 18:09

Were both 27 i have a child she doesnt

OP posts:
BumWad · 01/08/2017 18:12
Confused

Yea. I would have nothing more to do with her.

hayli · 01/08/2017 18:16

Hmm are you sure she wasn't drunk or something?

Littlebitshort · 01/08/2017 18:17

I have a friend that sounds similar to yours OP. Very inappropriate in what she does and says but for some strange reason i am still friends with her. Im not sure why. Maybe its because she is so different from everyone else and i like different. However lately some of the stuff she has been saying is a little too 'out there' and most likely down to mental health issues (she has told me so, im not assuming). Iv had to slowly back away from the friendship as she is getting out of control. I do feel a bit guilty as instead of supporting her im actually just dumping and running. However you do have to look after No. 1 so if her attitude/behaviour is affecting you then its time to cut those strings.

Tartyflette · 01/08/2017 18:18

Who on earth would ask to come and stay at a friend's on the first night the baby is brought home!

AcrossthePond55 · 01/08/2017 18:19

TBH, the friendship has run its course. But I wouldn't sink to her level and reply in kind.

A simple "Thanks for letting me know how you feel. It's obvious we are not on the same 'life path'. I wish you well on yours."

Then block her and/or delete her.

astoundedgoat · 01/08/2017 18:20

I would assume that she was very drunk.

If I was feeling charitable, I would leave it a day and text her asking (as suggested above) "Did you send this?" and if she says yes, then cut her out, quietly and gracefully.

BasinHaircut · 01/08/2017 18:20

She sounds like she is on glue.

peepholepringle · 01/08/2017 18:21

Nothing useful to add but she sounds horrendous Shock

fairgame84 · 01/08/2017 18:21

I'd be tempted to forward that on to your other mutual friends and then block the cow.
That text is so nasty. What a horrible person.

JustDanceAddict · 01/08/2017 18:22

She sounds deranged.

karmacoma1 · 01/08/2017 18:23

This smacks of jealousy to me. Can she not have children? Or is nowhere close to being in a position to have them?

I worked with a girl like this - would go on and on how she loved being an auntie as she could hand the kids back, shared tons of stuff about being kid free and loving it on Facebook.

It's painfully obvious she's desperate for a baby, and is trying to convince everyone including herself otherwise.

Sad really.

redexpat · 01/08/2017 18:25

I once received a really awful text from a friend. Turned out it wasnt her that sent it, her phone had been nicked. I would ask if she sent it before deciding on what to do.

Annimousey · 01/08/2017 18:26

Wow. She sounds delightful. Is she always like this?

ManyManyShoes · 01/08/2017 18:29

Periods and commas are good things.

RandomDent · 01/08/2017 18:33

Are you sure it was her who wrote it?

littlebird7 · 01/08/2017 18:33

She sounds desperately unhappy in the extreme.

Lonely. Miserable. Messed up and if I received that message I think I would have burst out laughing tbh, as none of it is actually for real, it is just stupid....could it be a joke??!!

That said not sure I could spend the rest of my life with a friend with such a dirty mouth anyway, she must be a complete embarrassment to herself wherever she goes if she sounds like that all of the time!

PyongyangKipperbang · 01/08/2017 18:34

Who on earth would ask to come and stay at a friend's on the first night the baby is brought home!

To piss on "her" territory.

In the fucked up mind of the woman, the OP is her friend first, last and always. The OH and the baby are interlopers, and although they exist they need to learn that they are way below the "friend" in the hierarchy. Except that the OP didnt go along with it, hence the nasty behaviour.

She is possessive and likely to get worse until she finds another victim. I bet she is a fucking nightmare girlfriend and even worse ex....

Flowersandfootballs · 01/08/2017 18:34

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

coddiwomple · 01/08/2017 18:34

Before anything else, are you sure SHE sent that? And no a friend/partner/colleague who took a phone to make a "joke"?

alleypalley · 01/08/2017 18:35

I'd send her one message on the same medium, 'did you send this!' as it's so extreme I'd wonder whether someone else had borrowed her phone.

That was my first thought. I'd phone and ask if she sent it and if she confirms she did I'd hand up and block her.

KC225 · 01/08/2017 18:37

Time to send her that 'And you wonder why you're single' text