What are your family in-jokes?

[bumblebee50]

This is not an AIBU and is meant to be lighthearted. I am just back from holiday and only took one pair of pyjamas. I asked my DH if he had a spare t-shirt I could wear and he gave me one telling me it made him look a bit "Kenneth". I got the reference straight away. Anyone else hazard a guess as to what he meant? Also what are your family in-jokes that no-one else would understand? My children called their tonsils their rileys for many years and I've no idea why.

Our most infamous one that gets groans we've done it so much is, if anyone asks what time is it the answer is always "hammer time"

When the youngest got her first watch and was learning to tell the time, she played it so well it was ridiculous (especially as my Nan never got the joke )

We call the remote control the Raol Moat

Lifesaverormassmurderer, dh does that one too, "I'm hungry" "hi hungry, pleased to meet you" every time someone announces something like that.
We have loads of Father ted references, like if I'm trying to jog his memory and he can't remember an incident or event or whatever I always say " you were wearing your blue jumper" and he then acts like the penny has dropped.
Anytime anyone in our house breaks anything we look at each other and say "Cowboys ted"

We describe disappointing things as 'a bit Melton Mowbray' because we once went to MM for a trip out and we thought the streets would be lined with pork pie shops. We were sorely disappointed and consequently everything disappointing is 'MM'.

Whenever one of us has a large dinner/meal in a restaurant/eaten too much food - we always say 'Got your big plate, Alan?' From one of the Alan Partridge programmes.

We have loads, but I collect Kevins (this is horribly outing. Hi everyone!) If I find a Kevin I call DM to put him on my Kev list. The original Kevin wasn't a Kevin... I just thought he looked like one.

Also anything that might have gone mouldy or overripe is met with "these sausages are mouldy!" from the musical film of "Oliver". To which the correct response back from whoever hears you is "Shut up and drink your gin!"

At his daughter's wedding abroad my quite 'careful in mixed company' friend sat down in mixed company and said....... it's so hot, my foreskin is dripping sweat' !!!! He of course, meant forehead.
Silence all round and then uproarious laughter.
Dear friend was mortified but saw the humour ok.

When we now say ' it's hot today' We all are thinking of dear friend. He is reminded of it often .

We describe anything uncouth/icky as "a bit Bet Lynch" because my mum always described her as someone with no class

If we see something at the side of the road that has obviously been abandoned we have to offer it to the other person who has to come up with a reason why they don't want it e.g. Do you want that (battered and broken) leather recliner? No, the colour doesn't match the decor in the lounge. Do you want that trainer over there? No it's the wrong size etc

Since getting pregnant with my DS and subsequently after giving birth, every time a sexual innuendo falls in to conversation, DH and I say ‘and that’s how we got in to this mess’.
We’ll have to stop before he gets old enough to understand as I don’t want to give him a complex, but for the time being, DH and I find it hilarious.