my cleaner has quit - says my house is difficult to clean! embarrassed

[allaboutthatsass]

So I've had a cleaner for 3 hours pw for the past year. She cleans our 3 bed detached and does our ironing. All agreed when she was hired.

Sometimes she comes alone, sometimes she comes with 2 staff (and they might finish in an hour).

She's now quit, saying my house is just too much for her. She says I have too much ironing to be done in 3 hours and that I'm not doing anything in between her visits.

I work full time as does my husband (in fact he has two jobs, a sunday is the only day I see more than an hour or two of him a day whilst awake). Our DD is 9.

I've never been houseproud, I admit, and I'm crap at ironing BUT my house is not tidy. There is zero clutter. I do my laundry daily, I make the beds, put stuff in the dishwasher, open windows for fresh air, I really try my best with the little time I have.

I'm very embarrassed that she thinks my house is too much work. My mother and sister tell me I'm a lazy shit (they are both a bit aggie and kim) but my friends say my house is a normal family house so I don't know if AIBU or my cleaner is?

I hired her to help me but seemingly my house is that bad she doesn't want the money...

we have a mutual friend and according to this friend if I want her back then she wants more money to do my house due to the amount of work she feels needs done every week. I pay £30 for 3 hours a week. I have recently had a drop in pay so not really keen on paying more.

Can anyone help me with advice on managing housework without a cleaner on such little time?

Oh and in addition to my full time job, I'm also a distance learning uni student as of September, so even less time!

Send your ironing out. £10 an hour is also on the low side.

My cleaner does three hours in a 2 bed and I tidy everything before she comes. She sometimes finishes a little bit early but I can't see how she'd have time for a load of ironing too.

Fair enough she doesn't wish to have the work anymore, but she was U to criticise your housekeeping. Had she wanted the work she could have said 3 hours wasn't enough time to get it all done and suggested things to drop (eg some of the ironing) or that you pay for more time.

IMO 3 hours should be enough to clean a house like you describe and do a few bits of ironing (eg 4/5 work shirts) but probably isn't enough to do a massive basket of ironing!

Sorry you are expecting too much. No one likes to do their job badly, I've experienced this in my current workplace. Massive overload of work, can't do anything properly. I hate doing a bad job, maybe your cleaner feels the same?

It's not her issue you can't afford anymore money? Do you go to sainsburys and say I want sirloin steak but I can only afford basics mince price, so I'll just pay that?

I've not ironed in three years since a friend of mine told me she never did. At first I thought it was odd but it was a revolution! I can confirm that ironing is a waste of time. You would never know. Perhaps some clothes show it more than others though.

We don't even iron the boys' school uniform because it dries creaseless. If they wore proper shirts it might be different.

My husband still spends 20 mins every fortnight ironing a few of his tops and his work trousers - he has not been converted yet!

We have a 3 bed & cleaner takes 4 hours. She doesn't iron.

For goodness sake there's two of you with one child - just crack on and do it. There's one of me and I work ft, have two kids and manage to do my own cleaning and ironing as well as fitting in hobbies and family time.

OP my cleaner does 2 hours, and cleans my 3 bedroom terrace in that time, however she doesn't do the spare room as I dry my laundry in there and occasionally use it for ironing.

The trick to not ironing is to get one of those ironing tidy's. Hang wet clothes on hangers (give them a good shake and pull into shape first)

I also spend the night before making all surfaces are clear and there is no clutter.

I run the hoover round in between, as we have pets, and wipe the kitchen sides down but not much else if I'm honest.

You say you aren't houseproud. This doesn't make sense to me if you have a cleaner?

Save money and get rid of cleaners altogether then?

Only in the world of MN does someone believe all people who work FT have cleaners!

I have never had one : the thought of having to tidy and clean for the cleaner stresses me out!

I am not 'houseproud'. Have never ironed (last time I tried, ancient iron deposited stains on my expensive dress). Basically, the floors get hoovered when someone looks at them and feels a bit despairing. We have a ridiculous number of bathrooms. I keep 'mine' cleanish. I have given up on DCs and DSs bathrooms and blitz them when I think they might die of a disease due to filth. Most rooms only get tidied and cleaned if visitors are coming. This is an occasional stress rather than a weekly/daily battle. No one in our household is at all tidy. I am the tidiest but am following path of least resistance.

The only time I might get a cleaner would be to put the house on the market as limescale is a big problem round here so I would want a professional blitzing. I get an oven cleaner once a year or so and do need my carpets cleaned this summer.

If the whole thing is stressing you (and the cleaner) out, live in relative squalor instead!!!

I genuinely do not believe anyone who doesn't understand that one doesn't need to iron cannot describe themselves as 'not houseproud'!

Chill out : it's the cheapest option!

Can you discuss with your cleaner what she would be able to do in 3 hours? Are there some tasks which could be done less frequently?

Also, buy a second iron and ironing board and then you and your DH can both iron together and chat/catch up while doing so. This would also mean your cleaner wouldn't need to iron and you can make the most of the 1-2hrs an evening where you do see each other.

Sounds like you don't have the means to have a cleaner if you cannot afford the extra. I only iron my dcs clothes all 3 of them and iron to wear our clothes and it takes me 2 hours a week to do that nm cleaning the house on top of that.

Get her too do down stairs and the bathrooms, and write out a list of tasks in order you want them done, if you take things out of the tumble dryer while warm, hang up straight away, and it won't need ironing.

Hi OP - as the others have said, keep the cleaner but no ironing.

On the ironing front, as others have said, hang you clothes out to dry in hangers and smooth out. Also as you replace old clothes, buy non-iron shirts and this will decrease the ironing.

On this:
"Can anyone help me with advice on managing housework without a cleaner on such little time?
Oh and in addition to my full time job, I'm also a distance learning uni student as of September, so even less time!"

1. Daily - keep kitchen counters clean, wash dishes -- anything that might attract rats needs to be cleaned daily.
2. Dedicate 15 minutes a day to doing a chore. Eg - it only takes me 15 minutes to do Bathroom and Kitchen floors and I do that on Saturday or Sunday mornings as I am an early bird. Think of the jobs you need to do weekly and allocate them to 15 minute slots for each day. Don't beat yourself up if you miss a day.
3. Drunk cleaning - sometimes I have a couple of glasses of wine and music whilst cleaning and I am fine to do 30 -45 minutes :).
4. Iron or do your 15 minutes chores whilst chatting to your mum or friends on phone (using headset).

Try and incorporate the cleaning in your every day life. Do everything you can not to make it a chore. Include your husband and child even if their daily cleaning jobs are 5 minutes instead of 15 minutes.

Even doing all these things above I still get a cleaner once every 3 weeks to do the bath, scrub kitchen and dust everywhere. Good luck with your upcoming studies. Take a deep breath. YOU GOT THIS.

If you think she can manage ironing and housecleaning in three hours, then spend 30 minutes a day yourself on it and have Sunday off. That's 3 hours so you should be able to get it done (and save £120 a month).

I had a cleaner for a bit (figured my DLA may as well be put to good use) but it was too weird. I hated being an "employer" and never knew what to ask her to do.

Just on my post.

Full disclosure - for the below. I probably only do this 3 or 4 days a week (not every day). Floors are very important to me so that will always be done weekly. Your miles might differ as to what you choose to do for your 15 minute jobs.

1. Dedicate 15 minutes a day to doing a chore. Eg - it only takes me 15 minutes to do Bathroom and Kitchen floors and I do that on Saturday or Sunday mornings as I am an early bird. Think of the jobs you need to do weekly and allocate them to 15 minute slots for each day. Don't beat yourself up if you miss a day.

Odd that she decided to quit rather than just do the cleaning.

Has she told you before that it was too much?

3 hours is not nearly enough time to clean a big house and do a weeks worth of ironing!

Cut out the ironing and do it yourself. You only need to do the basics, kids dont care if their stuff is pressed within an inch of its life! As mine got older I do less ironing, only the stuff that really needs it.

TBF you are not doing any housework for a whole week so there is a lot of cleaning to do, floors etc will need a proper clean not just a quick wipe over, there will be dust everywhere etc. Its not a quick job and you are expecting far too much in 3 hours.

As pp said do something every day/couple of days. Quick wash round the bathroom, clean the loo, fliskc round with a duster etc so the dust/dirt isnt piling up round the whole house each week.

I iron while I am watching tv (sunday mornings are good, all those cooking programmes) so I dont feel like I am doing 'work'

And your DD is quite capable of helping you with cleaning!

If you can't afford more hours or to send out the ironing, do it yourself.

You obviously live somewhere unique if all your FT friends have cleaners. I don't know anyone with a cleaner and they all manage to work FT, clean, iron, do DIY and have times for hobbies etc.

The pair of you need to do something yourselves, your child will grow up thinking you don't have to do anything in the home.

rainbows - we have a cleaner and I only work once a week. Everyone I know has cleaners: the ones who live in house shares, the ones who rent, the ones who own small flats, the ones who work part time - everyone.

Why are people so snobby about others having cleaners?

Of course I can clean my own house - I did it for years, and I still do top-up cleans in between cleaner visits - but to be honest I'd rather spend that 3-4 hours doing something nice, so I pay somebody to else to do it. The same way I pay people to hang wallpaper or wash my car or clean my windows - all things I could do myself, but I'd rather not have to!

I work shifts 30 hrs a week, have 3 bed house, 2 kids living here and 2 visit plus 2 cats. I clean my house each week in 2 hrs. I Hoover most days but do it as and when I have time so be it if I'm running the hoover around whilst cooking tea or ironing whilst watching tv at night at gone 10 pm. It's shit but that's being a working mother.

I think you are either do it yourself or face paying more to get a separate cleaner and ironing service. Also jobs could be given to dh and child, they all live there.

Agreed not enough time rather than your house being too much work. My cleaner takes 2 hours for a small 2 bed flat. I very much doubt you will be able to find another cleaner than will do all cleaning and ironing in 3 hours

3 hours isn't enough to clean and iron!
Have you done the ironing and cleaning and timed how long it takes?

Pay someone else to do the ironing and get a cleaner that comes in for 2 hours twice a week to help keep on top of it.