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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

my cleaner has quit - says my house is difficult to clean! embarrassed

396 replies

allaboutthatsass · 27/07/2017 22:16

So I've had a cleaner for 3 hours pw for the past year. She cleans our 3 bed detached and does our ironing. All agreed when she was hired.

Sometimes she comes alone, sometimes she comes with 2 staff (and they might finish in an hour).

She's now quit, saying my house is just too much for her. She says I have too much ironing to be done in 3 hours and that I'm not doing anything in between her visits.

I work full time as does my husband (in fact he has two jobs, a sunday is the only day I see more than an hour or two of him a day whilst awake). Our DD is 9.

I've never been houseproud, I admit, and I'm crap at ironing BUT my house is not tidy. There is zero clutter. I do my laundry daily, I make the beds, put stuff in the dishwasher, open windows for fresh air, I really try my best with the little time I have.

I'm very embarrassed that she thinks my house is too much work. My mother and sister tell me I'm a lazy shit (they are both a bit aggie and kim) but my friends say my house is a normal family house so I don't know if AIBU or my cleaner is?

I hired her to help me but seemingly my house is that bad she doesn't want the money...

we have a mutual friend and according to this friend if I want her back then she wants more money to do my house due to the amount of work she feels needs done every week. I pay £30 for 3 hours a week. I have recently had a drop in pay so not really keen on paying more.

Can anyone help me with advice on managing housework without a cleaner on such little time?

Oh and in addition to my full time job, I'm also a distance learning uni student as of September, so even less time!

OP posts:
stopfuckingshoutingatme · 27/07/2017 22:28

Cut the ironing and agree a list with her ?
I think she needs at least 3 hours just to clean no !
We had a cleaner who told me my house was 'very dirty' cheeky bitch . She didn't last long 😖

Original poster
allaboutthatsass · 27/07/2017 22:30

just noticed in my OP I said my house is not tidy, I meant to write "Not dirty"

OP posts:
TheAntiBoop · 27/07/2017 22:30

If you have someone come once a week you still need to do some cleaning in between. Unclear if the op is doing the basics or not!

QuiteLikely5 · 27/07/2017 22:30

How about you offer her another hour?

Expellibramus · 27/07/2017 22:30

Can't she just get done what she can in three hours and agree the priority? Sounds like she's trying to get out of the job disingenuously as she's been offered something she'd prefer / wants less work.

Either way - just get somebody else.

schoolgaterebel · 27/07/2017 22:31

I don't have a cleaner.

I can just about clean my 3 bedroom semi in 3 hours (if it is completely tidy first, with everything in its place and no clutter)

Expecting ironing to be included is too much.

ScoobyDoosTinklyLaugh · 27/07/2017 22:31

I'm a cleaner!

Its not that your house is foul or anything, but 3 hours isn't enough time for a full clean and ironing. It can be quite stressful when your trying to fit in loads in a small amount of time, especially if she's like me where you don't want to do a shit job of something but you haven't got time to do a good job.

If you don't want to pay more I'd stop getting her to do the ironing and stress that you don't want everything up to a perfect standard, just get her to whizz over everything.

TheAntiBoop · 27/07/2017 22:32

The problem with doing what she can in three hours is that the dirt will build up if no one else is filling the gaps

That's probably why she's had enough after a year

Get someone else and ask them how long then need

schoolgaterebel · 27/07/2017 22:32

I don't think you should try to offer more money or hours to try to keep her.

Find a new cleaner but you can't expect her to iron as well. 5 hours for the house and ironing is more reasonable.

Liadain · 27/07/2017 22:33

How is she being unreasonable? Your house (and ironing) is too much work in too little time for too little money for her, so she wants out. That's completely fair.

If you can't afford to pay more but want to keep her on, you need to reduce the amount you expect, and pick up the slack.

You'll have to clean as you go. I assume you work the regular 9-5? Just putting things away makes a big difference. Personally I set myself a target of an hour and see how much I can tidy. Stick on a tv show as you iron. There's lots of little ways to manage.

Your dd is also old enough now to take on a household job - I did at that age. Good for learning life skills and you could give her a little pocket money for it.

JessieMcJessie · 27/07/2017 22:34

It's almost certainly cheaper to send the ironing out/ get a specialist ironing person in than it is to pay a cleaner by the hour to do it. What is the ironing mostly- is it your husband's work shirts, school uniform or fiddly female stuff? Can you separate out the things that must be ironed weekly as needed regularly and the things that you can chop and change with other stuff in your wardrobe, and iron the latter yourself?
Also, your DD is 9. At that age I used to help my Mum with the ironing.

As for the cleaner, mine comes weekly and I do very little between visits- I don't hoover, dust or mop or clean the stove top unless it's very dirty. Life is too short. We have 3 beds and 2 baths, as well as a playroom, big kitchen/diner and living room. I pay her £12.50 for 4 hours, she's a fast worker and she just finishes in that time. No ironing though she does hang out my washing if a load is done and she has time. To be honest I think that if you are, like me, not willing to do anything between. Iaits then you'll have to bite the bullet and either pay for more hours or reduce the workload.

Groupie123 · 27/07/2017 22:34

I think you need more than 3 hours. Talk to her. Ask her if she can do more hours inially then drop it down. I think you shouldn't get her to do housekeeping jobs- most launderettes offer laundary services now, some of which even do pick ups/drop offs and it's often a lot cheaper than hiring a cleaner to do it.

Donttouchthethings · 27/07/2017 22:34

I don't iron anything.

Original poster
allaboutthatsass · 27/07/2017 22:35

I can't afford more hours nor can I afford to send my ironing elsewhere.

I'm envious of people who say they never iron - I just don't know how they can get away with non ironed clothes.

Most people I know with nice houses, are SAHM or work part time. I don't know any full time friends who don't have a cleaner.

OP posts:
honeylulu · 27/07/2017 22:35

We have cleaner for 3 hours in our 3 bed house. They take the ironing away and we collect it - that is extra time/charge though.
They just about do the house (three come and stay one hour) and they only just get it done in that time. No tidying required. We even empty the bins to make sure they don't get distracted from actually cleaning.
We pay £18.75 an hour (admittedly an agency) maybe yours could do with a raise!

TheAntiBoop · 27/07/2017 22:36

What are you expecting her to iron?

Get her to do the three hours and you and your partner can do the ironing

ScoobyDoosTinklyLaugh · 27/07/2017 22:37

I'm tired, I didn't mean to add that exclamation mark. I'm not that excited about being a cleaner.

Zoflorabore · 27/07/2017 22:37

Hi op, several years ago I was in this situation but I was the cleaner.

The house was a 4 bed detached, massive with a big side extension/games room/gym and conservatory on the back, upstairs were 3 bathrooms too.
They wanted me to clean the whole house and floors and fit in something each week like doing the inside of the oven for £25 for 3 hours!

I lasted a few weeks, tried to tell them i either needed more hours to manage their expectations or to do less in the allocated time.

It took around an hour just to do all of the floors.
They had lovely stuff but were so lazy, never did any cleaning ( self confessed ) and had loads of money but honestly thought I could do the whole house in three hours so I left.

Just a perspective from the other side.

londonrach · 27/07/2017 22:38

Surely just the ironing would take 3 hours. Shes right. Just ask her to do the house, no ironing and do some tidying. Can your 9 year old help with tiding

Lucysky2017 · 27/07/2017 22:38

I never iron. My sons have non iron shirts for schools. I don't wear blouses or shirts. It's dead easy not to have ironing done.

As for how many hours for just cleaning apps like Handy will give you an estimate - my large 5 bed they have as 6 hours. We had someone 5 mornings a week when children were young and then 3 time a week until recently.
I have always worked full time and we could not afford a cleaner for a few years (which is common for very many people when money is tight of course even when you both work full time).

Just find someone else and don't have them iron. What items do you like to have ironed? Could you just wear a different type of thing to avoid ironing?

DropZoneOne · 27/07/2017 22:38

My cleaner does 2 hours cleaning in a 3 bedroom house, 2 adults and 1 child. I do tidy so all surfaces are clear. She gets the house clean but there's no time for extra. She works damn hard, I was at home a few weeks ago when it was 30 odd degrees and she was whizzing round!

A weeks ironing is more than an hour - you can do 10-15 items in that time. So either up her hours or take away the ironing if you're happy with her and would prefer to keep her.

londonrach · 27/07/2017 22:39

£10 per hour sounds very cheap but depends where you are. Thinking north at that wage

haggisaggis · 27/07/2017 22:40

When we had a cleaner (4 bed house) she did 6 hours per week 2 of which were for ironing. Even then had to sometimes pay more as the ironing would be more than 2 hours. We did ensure house was tidy and no clutter before she came (otherwise she refused to clean!)

WildernessWhale · 27/07/2017 22:41

Instead of paying for a cleaner, what about outsourcing your ironing to someplace?

I hate ironing.

londonrach · 27/07/2017 22:41

I never iron! 🤗😁. Dh does his shirts, apart from that our iron isnt used unless we going to a wedding, interview..