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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

my cleaner has quit - says my house is difficult to clean! embarrassed

396 replies

allaboutthatsass · 27/07/2017 22:16

So I've had a cleaner for 3 hours pw for the past year. She cleans our 3 bed detached and does our ironing. All agreed when she was hired.

Sometimes she comes alone, sometimes she comes with 2 staff (and they might finish in an hour).

She's now quit, saying my house is just too much for her. She says I have too much ironing to be done in 3 hours and that I'm not doing anything in between her visits.

I work full time as does my husband (in fact he has two jobs, a sunday is the only day I see more than an hour or two of him a day whilst awake). Our DD is 9.

I've never been houseproud, I admit, and I'm crap at ironing BUT my house is not tidy. There is zero clutter. I do my laundry daily, I make the beds, put stuff in the dishwasher, open windows for fresh air, I really try my best with the little time I have.

I'm very embarrassed that she thinks my house is too much work. My mother and sister tell me I'm a lazy shit (they are both a bit aggie and kim) but my friends say my house is a normal family house so I don't know if AIBU or my cleaner is?

I hired her to help me but seemingly my house is that bad she doesn't want the money...

we have a mutual friend and according to this friend if I want her back then she wants more money to do my house due to the amount of work she feels needs done every week. I pay £30 for 3 hours a week. I have recently had a drop in pay so not really keen on paying more.

Can anyone help me with advice on managing housework without a cleaner on such little time?

Oh and in addition to my full time job, I'm also a distance learning uni student as of September, so even less time!

OP posts:
hellejuice91 · 30/07/2017 08:15

A close family member of mine has a house cleaning business and she gave up a job for a similar reason. She was just not being given enough hours to do the job in, when she asked the home owner if she could have more hours/ take a couple of jobs of the list she was told no. This woman did literally do nothing between her visits though. 3 bed house in 3 hours with ironing is a huge amount to expect someone to do.

Ankleswingers · 30/07/2017 08:24

Do you do anything at all by way of tidying/ cleaning?

If not YABU for expecting someone to do everything in 3 hours a week.

My next door neighbor doesn't do anything either. Her Mum comes and takes her washing and ironing and she has a cleaner too. Her cleaner does everything else.

YABU.

KatieC0811 · 30/07/2017 08:44

Never saw the point of ironing,shake and fold all washing as soon as it comes out the machine, then hang it up to dry (inside or outside) then fold as soon as you get it in, cant tell it's not been ironed. Must save me hours

SummerMummy88 · 30/07/2017 08:54

Where about are you, I'm looking for a new cleaner in the NW

Temporary2002 · 30/07/2017 09:38

How about you iron while watching TV after dc is in bed? Your house can't be that bad from your description. Can the cleaner simply do the sweeping/hoovering/washing floors, dust and polish and clean the bathrooms?

MaryTheCanary · 30/07/2017 10:26

Find a dry cleaners etc. that offers an ironing service near your workplace (or your DH's). Look at your laundry, make some hard decisions about which things absolutely HAVE to be ironed (work shirts, the occasional nice dress, pillow cases) and dump the bag of items at the dry cleaner's on your lunch break or on your way back from work.

Set out a few chores for your 9yo to do at the weekend.

Make sure there are gloves, cleaning product bottles and wipes located around the house in places where they are required (bath, toilet, kitchen sink etc.) and have a conversation about everyone getting a bit better at wiping down and cleaning up after themselves throughout the week. Make it into a habit.

If you do all that, 3 hours is probably enough.

Fairenuff · 30/07/2017 10:44

I think that if your only time to clean or iron is at the weekend, you shouldn't have your cleaner coming in on a Friday.

Change to a Tuesday or Wednesday. Problem solved!

Arthur2shedsJackson · 30/07/2017 13:23

Oh dear. We've just moved ( 2 of us ), 3 bed house and I've got a cleaner starting tomorrow for 12 hrs pw. Have I gone OTT?
As far as ironing is concerned I remember back in the day doing the week's ironing including 25 shirts in front of the Eastenders omnibus every Sunday afternoon. Worked for me.

paxillin · 30/07/2017 13:43

I still say try another cleaner. Mine does all of your list in 3 hours. I don't have pets though. She is fast and good, but not unusual among the cleaners my friends have.

In areas with plenty of cleaners (we are in central London), this is the norm. If you live somewhere with very few cleaners, they can of course pick their clients with more ease and will go for the single, child free professional over the family for the same money.

secretselkie · 30/07/2017 20:44

as said by a pp.. get your daughter to help you keep on top of it between cleaner visits... my 9 year old is perfectly capable of vacuuming easy areas, putting stuff back where it belongs, picking up/putting out rubbish & recycling and emptying the dishwasher.. she was a weekly chore chart (along with her 13 year old sister, and does a great job of just getting on with it

crazykitten20 · 30/07/2017 20:57

If you can't afford to pay a cleaner decent wages do the cleaning yourself . I work a 45 hour week ( on average) and do all my own cleaning and ironing. It's possible 😊

lynmilne65 · 30/07/2017 22:07

Get someone else, don't iron and just fold xx

SheSaidNoFuckThat · 30/07/2017 23:38

Seriously? Just do some cleaning! No ones in your house all day making it dirty so there can't be much to do! Clean as you go in the evening and job done! Clean the loo before you go to bed, rinse bath/shower when you get out of it, it's not difficult!

Ecureuil · 31/07/2017 06:47

Most of our cleaning gets done as part of every day life. I clean/wipe the shower when I get out of it. Wipe the sink after cleaning my teeth. Clean all kitchen surfaces/hob in the evenings after dinner. I Hoover most days as I have a a dog and 2 toddlers, otherwise I'd do it on a Saturday morning. I clean the insides of the windows at the weekend alongside said toddlers... they love being given a cloth and a spray bottle! DH does a more robust clean of the kitchen at the weekend.

rollonthesummer · 31/07/2017 09:27

My mother and sister tell me I'm a lazy shit (they are both a bit aggie and kim) but my friends say my house is a normal family house so I don't know if AIBU or my cleaner is?

Is be more inclined to listen to family as they will probably tell you the warts and all truth rather than friends (unless there is a family dynamic we don't know about!)

There are 5 in our house and I never iron so don't really get that-I just would never pay anyone to do something I don't view as important. DH and I both have professional jobs and don't look scruffy. Kids have non-iron shirts and all is well. I would get a cleaner to do 3 hours cleaning and then the problem is solved. If you are so desperate to have your ironing done, you need to either get an ironing person, do it at the weekend or in the evenings.

rollonthesummer · 31/07/2017 09:29

Oh dear. We've just moved ( 2 of us ), 3 bed house and I've got a cleaner starting tomorrow for 12 hrs pw. Have I gone OTT?

OMG-really?! If I could afford 12 hours per week cleaning, I would have gone for a 4 bedroomed house Grin! Seriously though, that must cost an absolute fortune?!

Oly5 · 31/07/2017 09:45

I pay my cleaner £10ph south east and she set the rate. I don't think you're paying top little but you ARE expecting too much on three hours.

Bluntness100 · 31/07/2017 09:55

Op. It's understandable you don't have the time, what's unreasonable is expecting the cleaner to do it all in three hours because you can't afford more time. It's not her fault.

It sounds like you've got a shed load of laundry if you're doing daily washes, then in addition you want your house cleaned and you want it all done for thirty quid because you can't afford more. Can you really not understand why she quit?

You have three choices, up her hours, do more yourself, or have more left undone.

Leapfrog44 · 31/07/2017 12:15

something doesn't ring true. If your house has zero clutter and is cleaned weekly it should be an absolute breeze. As far as a cleaner is concerned, grime is no problem, mess and clutter are.

Also always pre-clean your toilet before a cleaner comes/. No skids, no pee under the seat and no splatters.

paxillin · 31/07/2017 12:25

I think the cleaner found a higher paying client, that's all. No need for the angst, get another. Check the going rate where you are, £10-12 is not unusual in central London, many cleaners work in a small area and walk from job to job. Out in the suburbs it can be more and I imagine much more in rural areas.

Original poster
allaboutthatsass · 31/07/2017 21:25

yes she does have higher paying clients. In fact she would often not turn up on her agreed day because she'd been held up at one of those clients who paid more/booked more hours.

I'd often come back to find house un done and no message from her. I'd have to text her to find out what had happened and she'd say oh I'll come tomorrow instead.

My DH does most of the cooking. Nothing else as he's busy working. I'm trying to get DD to help more for pocket money.

OP posts:
Loopytiles · 31/07/2017 21:42

Look for someone new OP.

paxillin · 31/07/2017 22:31

Try to book a mid-week slot, they are less popular and you will unlikely find a fabulous cleaner paying at the lower end of the pay scale if you insist on the most popular day. You might have to up the pay a bit though.

ParanoidBeryl · 01/08/2017 21:12

Well I can't comment on your house, but your cleaner sounds unprofessional Not turning up is a huge no-no. For that alone I would have found another, since I go to significant lengths to tidy up and de-clutter before she comes. You also say that on the days 2 of them turn up, they finish after an hour. So you are paying for 3 hours work, but getting 2? Then she complains the house is too much work?

Then, as I said before, the fact she discussed you with your friend is completely not on.

Try another cleaner. From what you say, your house isn't that difficult to clean. Personally I don't bother doing bathrooms or hoover mid-week. They are fine from week to week. I might sweep the kitchen floor if it really needs it.

Like many other pps though, I would seriously ditch the ironing, and perhaps some of the laundry too. Are all of those clothes really dirty enough to warrant a wash? We do about 3 - 4 loads a week with a family of 4.

Cantstopeatingchocolate · 01/08/2017 22:07

I understand your need for a cleaner, I'm a lazy bint when I comes to cleaning (just as well DH does most of it) but you are not addressing the main points pp are making. 3hours for cleaning is fine but adding in 5-7 loads of ironing is way too much.
I love my stuff to ironed and we spend 3 hours + a week just ironing. I'm a bit weird cos I like duvets and sheets etc ironed too.
Your cleaner was not being unreasonable by quiting, just find a new one, discuss what you want and see who you can get, what they will do and for what price.