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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

End of term reward but only if you can afford it...

169 replies

Afterthenight · 19/07/2017 18:18

Possible unreasonable here and open to admit it.

Dds school are going to a theme park on Friday as an end of term trip. The trip was £50 plus food/spends and then as they were back late we would of needed to get a taxi part back due to no buses into the village at that time. We just couldn't afford it.

Near us there are a tree top wires, zip line place, roller skating/ice skating/bowling/cinema/escape rooms and all kinds of lovely places that the kids would have enjoyed for a fraction of the price.

Those kids who can't afford are in normal lessons all day on Friday with the 'naughty' and children who aren't allowed to go.

Aibu to think they could book somewhere cheaper which meant all children who earned a reward could go.

We were told about the trip two weeks ago.

OP posts:

BurberryBlue · 19/07/2017 20:12

I'm sure dcs will not miss the tacky theme park,tell them lessons are more productive.Plan a good day out for them,I can't imagine anything more loathsome than suffering noisy theme park attractions.

Troels · 19/07/2017 20:15

Mine would be "sick" that day, sick of school, and sick that they are classed as naughty kids cause we couldn't come up with £50+ for a trip.
Take a picnic to the park and have fun.
Our forecast here is downpours friday, they might not be missing much.

TheSnorkMaidenReturns · 19/07/2017 20:22

That's shocking. My DCs' school does two reward trips. One free and low key and one expensive and exciting. Kids can choose which one they go on.

Why don't you write to the school outlining what you've said here. It's not inclusive. Suggest that in the future they offer a free (or very cheap) trip as well?

TheMysteriousJackelope · 19/07/2017 20:22

That is ridiculous.

The DC's middle school used to do activities for well behaved children, the PTA paid for them. They were local, cheap stuff like going to the local trampoline activity center, or the university swimming pool. If they didn't have money for that, they had a party in the school with popcorn and movies.

When I lived in California it was even more strict. Our local school district wouldn't let the schools do anything that required the parents to pay, precisely to avoid poorer children from missing out. Any field trips had to be funded by the PTA, grant money, or the district paid for them.

Original poster

Afterthenight · 19/07/2017 20:33

I can't find the letter now but it definitely did not say voluntary.

OP posts:

KentMum2008 · 19/07/2017 20:39

My DCs school run a trip to Chessington every year as their end of term treat. They have fundraising activities for the whole of the summer term, things like selling ice creams after school and on sports day, they have a year 6 bbq where the PTA buy all the supplies, volunteer parents cook it and year 6's take orders and serve the food and drinks. All the profit goes into the year 6 trip fund and if there's not enough the cost is split between the parents and PTA. The most they've ever had to pay is £12 per child.

I know it's too late for this year, but maybe suggest to PTA something similar for next year? For what's it's worth, YANBU. £50 is a fortune at short notice for a trip.

bridgetreilly · 19/07/2017 20:42

School I used to teach in years ago ran an activity week in the summer term. Everything from £15 for a week's hardcore camping upto several hundred for a week somewhere in Europe. Plus fun day stuff for those who didn't want to/couldn't go away. It was brilliant because there was something everyone could do, and the most expensive things weren't always the best. And parents all knew from September and could pay in instalments etc.

£50 for one day with two week's notice? And no fun alternative? No way. I'd be sending in a complaint to the head teacher and chair of governors.

StripeyDeckchair · 19/07/2017 20:45

I'd just like to point out that if the trip is too expensive for you then you should tell the organisers that you want your child to go but can't afford it.
The law is quite clear that children cannot be excluded from trips by virtue of parental finances - the school should have a policy on this. It's probably hidden away/got a name that doesn't reflect the contents as most schools are reluctant to let parents know this.

OhhBetty · 19/07/2017 20:51

Jesus 50 quid is my weekly food and fuel budget! Dreading when ds gets to school age. I'd keep him off providing I wasn't at work and tell them in advance exactly why he wasn't going in.
Fucking joke.

SomethingPhishy · 19/07/2017 21:04

It's basically a scam, a reward should not incur a cost. Puts me in mind of dodgy timeshare tactics - 'Attend a short presentation about our properties & we will reward you with a FREE holiday!' *

flights/taxes/transportation not included

londonmummy1966 · 19/07/2017 21:08

My dds school had an activity day recently. Dd1s was a really lousy one that very few girls wanted to do. Nearly 3/4 of the year were "sick" on the day. That includes a group of girls who had booked themselves advance tickets for Chessington.
I agreed my dd could have the day off provided she did something enjoyable but vaguely educational with me. We had a lovely day out and visited the Grayson Perry exhibition at the Serpentine Gallery the white garden at Kensington Palace and collected swan's feathers. Total cost £6 for our lunch and an icecream for her.

Keep her off sick OP and have a fun day instead.

TheoriginalLEM · 19/07/2017 21:08

omg that is disgusting. I am so sorry that happened. i would have struggled to find that.

my dd is away on a camping trip with the school. The whole week is £80 we had a year to pay and i put in as and when i could.

That was very wrong of your dc's school.

The children who did not go were treated to an "activity week"at school.

traviata · 19/07/2017 21:09

I just got the message home about DC's reward. There is talk of a BBQ, popcorn and candy floss machines, inflatables on the school grounds, and other fun things, all in non uniform. The cost? £2 a head. That's the way to do it.

TheScottishPlay · 19/07/2017 21:10

This is ridiculous, I agree. DS school offered a cinema trip, with sweets and a drink for during the film for £5 plus money for a fast food lunch or the option to take a packed lunch.

Mumzypopz · 19/07/2017 21:22

High cost trips are the norm in High School these days. Our school had a £3000 odd trip to Africa, a trip to New York, a trip to Poland and a trip to France. They are all voluntary and if kids can't afford it, they just don't go.

Aquathest · 19/07/2017 21:24

As the trip is not an educational trip, I do not believe the Education Act regarding charging and remissions applies in OPs case.

However OP, I think you should write to the governing body with a suggestion that they consider charging and remission for such trips in future where the school canvass parents opinions in advance, whether they would sign up for a trip costing over £10. With the result being that if the majority feel it is too expensive the trip does not go ahead or if a small number of parents are not able to pay the school provides financial support.

Hope you are able to give your DD an alternative enjoyable day on Friday. What a horrible message her school is sending out.

BewareOfDragons · 19/07/2017 22:00

Contingency funds for children who need financial assistance won't be for 'fun' 'non-educational' trips, only trips tied to the curriculum.

It sucks, but more parents need to complain and raise a fuss if you want schools to keep events more low key and financially reasonable.

You can always keep her off. Tell them she is poorly and you'll see them next September

Twillow · 19/07/2017 22:20

This is SCHOOL we're talking about, isn't it? School where they go to learn?? Don't you think the school would be rather quick to complain and potentially prosecute if you told them you were keeping your child off for a day to go to a theme park!!?
I hate these trips on principle. They are absolutely hypocritical. At least the last fortnight of the summer term is wasted on crap activities. Mainly to guilt trip you into not taking your children away on holiday before the prices skyrocket, so that the school attendance figures stay looking good.
And as for the financial discrimination?? I thought children were not allowed to be excluded from a whole class trip on financial grounds (the charge used to be called a 'financial contribution'). I would write a strongly worded letter of complaint to the head and the chair of governors.

ladyyyglittersparkles · 19/07/2017 22:50

What a totally abhorrent cruel thing to do!!!

coconuttella · 20/07/2017 06:31

What a horrible message her school is sending out.

I agree, it is appalling to 'reward' those who can pay and effectively 'punish' those that cannot. I'd be so angry I'd be letting the local paper know... they shouldn't get away with this and should be shamed in the local press!

Tofutti · 20/07/2017 06:52

£50?! How does that work? Surely they would pay cheaper group rates for tickets and coaches aren't expensive?

I was at secondary school in the early 90s in London and a trip to Thorpe Park including tickets and coach travel was £5 per child. Now wondering if that was subsidisd.

Saucery · 20/07/2017 07:13

Coaches are really expensive, Tofutti. Most of a trip fee goes on them.

Original poster

Afterthenight · 20/07/2017 07:20

Coaches and insurance are really expensive. Not to mention the theme park is no where near us so a couple of hours drive.

OP posts:

HiggeldyPiggeldy · 20/07/2017 07:58

write a letter to the governors outlining the problem, this is an expensive trip and does single out those children from lower income families.

Tofutti · 20/07/2017 09:16

Sorry, meant to write 'coaches aren't that expensive. But £50 is still crazy in my opinion.

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