Being called 'flower' by a professional male is not on?

[Elendon]

So I'm getting quotes for work being done to my house and one man, who is a professional in his trade, kept calling me 'flower' over the phone. He's coming tonight to assess the work needed doing, and to be honest, he's my only hope in getting the work done.

Do I just smile and nod?

OP the only thing that matters here is what you think of it. So if you don't like being called flower then you need to, kindly, let him know.

People on here will have varying views (e.g. I wouldn't mind at all), but he's coming to your house to potentially be working with you.

What I mean is, please take this kindly, you need to work out how you feel as nobody else can help with that!

If it bothers you, then YANBU.

I don't mind it at all.
I had a horrible mole thing taken off my neck years ago. My scars always seem to be keloids, so I went back and saw another doctor (for a gross injection in it) who said "oh they have left you in a mess haven't they, flower? Made me feel really comforted and safe!

It isn't ok. It's 'little-womaning'.

I like being called flower or pet

Also I'm a teacher and have the worst habit of calling them poppet or my little man or little woman when they are poorly or hurt. I know it's a bit naughty and I try not to do it!

My female secretary calls everyone 'flower' indiscriminately. I like it.

Meh wouldn't bother me. I'm not sure id even notice! I live in Yorkshire I find it common round here to get called all sorts. At work customers use a lot of names like that. Flower, Love, dear, Lovely, I have on occasion been called my little chicken 😂 doesn't bother me! I suppose it's not overly professional really but doesn't offend me.

Tell him to call you elendon instead of flower.

Job done 🙄

I also have a separate person coming to the house to do some electrical work and he used my name. It was all very professional. Perhaps it was the disparate nature between the two calls.

These terms tend to be regional, when we moved into the deep dark south west I couldn't get used to my daughter being referred to as "the maid" I felt like I was living in a Dickens novel. I wasn't keen on "my lover" either but I got used to them.

I don't think YABU. I get called pal by taxi drivers, the window cleaner and even the workmen that re roofed our garage. DH gets called his name.

Aw, I quite like it.

YANBU.

All these awful "flower", "petal", "sunshine", etc names are just microaggressions that males like to use to attempt to assert their dominance over women

This kind of nonsense is getting old now. Head back to your safe space and play buzz word bingo with someone who gives a fuck.

"I was staying in a hotel once where a young girl working in the dining room was calling me 'sweetheart' as in 'now sweetheart...there you go sweetheart'... I asked her nicely to just call me by name."

I wouldn't have liked that either. It says so patronizing.

Wouldn't bother me, but we are all different.

I don't find it annoying in the context you describe.
If he was referring to men in a group as 'mr x' and you as 'flower' I would want his arse kicked.
If he was an Oncologist discussing breast surgery I wouldn't be happy.
If I was in court, buying a house or a car etc I wouldn't be happy.

But a builder who seems to use colloquial terms of address with everyone wouldn't piss me off.

In this case I do think its about context.

I'd get super annoyed too! I agree with CaretakerToNuns.

Ah Granny - I was also going to say the op should be glad he's not Bristolian and using my lover. That does tend to throw me - all the other names I don't mind when used naturally/ colloquially.

Call him Duck, or Hen or whatever works locally at the end of every sentence too.

I miss living in Glasgow where both sexes call women Hen or Doll and men either Big Man or Wee Man.

Somerford There is no need to be aggressive. In fact the irony of your reply is probably lost on you.

Yes, CaretakerToNuns Sorry I did miss your post and you do make a good point. It did feel a kind of micro aggression.

Head back to your safe space and play buzz word bingo with someone who gives a fuck.

I don't mind it at all, personally. I'm in AA, and am the youngest in my groups by at least 20 years. The older gents have always called me 'poppet' or 'sweetheart', and I quite like it - it almost feels paternal!

My dad is a 65 year old 6'3" yorkshire man. He gets called love or flower all the time. I miss it