To be at my wits end about our financial situation and not have a clue what to do?

[Endofmytethernow]

I'm feeling so low and worried about our situation so please be kind with replies.

Basically DH is the main earner, is self employed and for an amount of time a few months ago he did a huge amount of work for one company. He invoiced the company once he'd finished the work, the amount was in excess of £15k, and as yet they haven't paid him. He has chased the money multiple times but has had a varying response from the company ranging from 'Well, you should have savings to cover you for times when you're waiting for money' to telling him that he's been in the privileged position of doing a huge job for them and he should be appreciative of that and be willing to wait. He, understandably, doesn't want to piss them off as they have said there will be a lot more work in the future, and he doesn't want to burn bridges, so isn't willing to do much other than wait for the money and politely remind them from time to time.

The problem is, since this large job DH's industry has gone pretty quiet and he has only had tiny dribs and drabs of work since. He was banking on this money to keep him going for a few months. He has not paid himself a wage now for 4 months; we are at our overdraft limit now, have used up all of our savings, and to be quite honest are fucked!

I have my own small business which I have been building up during this time and to be fair I'm earning ok from it, and am earning enough to buy food, essentials, etc, but nowhere near the level DH earns! Also everything in the house and with the DCs is left to me so it's a real juggling act building it up whilst doing everything else.

It's getting me down so much and today I feel like I've hit a brick wall in terms of it all. We are talking of putting our house on the market and moving somewhere smaller as we have a good amount of equity, however DH decided the other day we needed a new kitchen floor and put a latex leveller on the floor, fucked it up and now it looks awful and we can't put the flooring down, so there is no way it can go on the market until it's done!

I am on long term antidepressants on a very low dose, which my GP refuses to increase. DH is in a constant bad mood because he's owed the money. The kids, especially our 13 year old, play up constantly. We're not entitled to any tax credits due to DH's income over the past year. We are screwed!

What the fuck can I do? I just want to curl up into a ball and go to sleep until it's all sorted.

It sounds like you are already doing everything that you can do OP and its up to your DH to bring more cash in.

What is he doing about it?

What does he say when you tell him how worried you are?

Sorry to hear you're in such a predicament, my dh is also self employed so I know that at times money can be uncertain. Practically are you able to release some equity from the house by borrowing more on the mortgage rather than selling up if this is a short term issue? Either that or asking for a mortgage holiday (even if you put the house on the market) might be an idea.

Wrt your husband asking for payment, are this company known for being slow at paying out? I assume your dh doesn't want to mention taking them to court etc as he doesn't want to rock the boat for future business from them but to be honest I'd be wary of doing work for a company so reluctant to pay. I'm sorry op that I don't have any other advice, I hope other posters will be able to help better.

I'm sorry you're in this position.

Your husband needs to demand he is paid and take legal action if they don't cough up. Why would he want to continue doing work for a company that don't pay him promptly anyway?

He says he's worried too, but doesn't seem to do much about it. He has various ideas of things he could do or people he could contact to get jobs but doesn't do it. He's permanently moody about it and lectures me about how we have no money.

Asking to be paid isn't burning bridges.

Any company that doesn't pay their suppliers and tells them they should be 'grateful' isn't one you want to work for!

I'd escalate with an 'overdue' invoice reminder then move up to a legal letter.

We're not able to increase the mortgage against the house unfortunately.

I've suggested to DH that he issues a letter threatening small claims court action but he won't.

Do you have an accountant? They might help you chase up the money from the firm's accounts department. My brother often has better luck going down this route than doing it himself with tardy payment when he sub contracts. Does your DH's invoice tot he firm have penalties for lte payment - could he waive those if they pay quickly.

Presumably his contract with this company included payment terms? Which they've now broken? I don't see why he'd ever want to work with them again given what they've done - they'd do it again! - so why is he worried about keeping them onside? He needs to get the money and fast. If a freelance customer did this to me I'd issue a final demand invoice with a firm payment date. Absolutely ridiculous to still be hanging on to the point where you're going to have to sell your house!

Oh, cross-post. That's really weird that he won't pursue it properly. Not to be all suspicious or anything but are you definitely sure that he's owed this money?

I think he is concerned that if he pisses this company off they will bad mouth him to other potential customers locally.

When did he invoice them for the money?
What were the payment terms on the invoice?
Has he looked at their accounts from companies house?

I would send them a statement showing the amount owed, and in big red letters state that there will be a 2% or 5% late payment penalty if monies are not received within 14 days of the date of the statement. They are likely to ignore it, but at least ur DH can chase next week to confirm they received the statement, and remind them that payment is due. I don't really know what else u can do tbh. Like another poster said above, you could ask your mortgage provider for a payment holiday, that might help ease the pressure for a month or two. Good luck.

Apply for a winding-up order requiring that the company be wound up on the basis that they cant pay their debts as they fall due. Assuming the company is solvent! Big companies sometimes take advantage of small traders by giving them shitloads of work then delaying/avoiding payment until they go under so dont have to pay at all. When this was done by a major supermarket chain to the tiny electrical installations co that I used to work for, this is what their solicitor did. They paid.

Also everything in the house and with the DCs is left to me so it's a real juggling act building it up whilst doing everything else

If he's barely working, why is he doing nothing in the house, for the children, or to help with your business? What is he doing with his time?

He has to threaten them legally. Some companies are arseholes and never pay until threatened.
It is part of being a small company owner.

Have you looked the company up ?

He needs to pester them daily for payment. They sound like they are about to go 'poof'
The only reason for non payment is that they have no money. Sorry.
You do not want clients who do not pay no matter how big they are.

www.gov.uk/wind-up-a-company-that-owes-you-money/overview

Obviously in future your DH needs to invoice big jobs more regularly in stages.

Do NOT take such shit like being "privileged" to do work for them. You do a job, you get paid within the thirty day terms (if you DH uses these). DH and I own a business and are very tough on the terms whoever the client. Get a statement drawn up and sent now with a demand for the outstanding balance. You may need to threaten further action if not paid within 7 days. Good luck op

'If he's barely working, why is he doing nothing in the house, for the children, or to help with your business? What is he doing with his time?'

This is exactly the question I wanted to ask. Also when he starts lecturing you about money tell him to fuck off.

You are messed up financially and he's concerned about falling out with this client?
Well for a start he ought to be concerned for his family and start issuing them letters with interest that have accumulated due to late payments and failure to pay will result in court proceedings.
If he was my DH, I would be fucked off with him and be in a bad mood every day. He's taking the piss out of you by being in denial.

He is owed more than 10k so it is no longer small claims. You need legal advice.

I also have to ask why your DH is 'leaving everything to you' wrt the house and kids, also could he not get some agency work (unskilled or not in his usual line of work if necessary) while his own work is slow to help bridge the gap financially? My DH is also self employed and does exactly this when there's no work in his usual trade.

Reading between the lines I suspect you have more of a DH problem than a financial one tbh, what's he doing about the floor he messed up? Or is that down to you to sort as well?

How would you feel about escalating this if your DH won't? Ultimately you all suffer if he won't take steps to be paid what he's owed. I'm not sure if that is overstepping the mark but if my DH wasn't being paid, wasn't doing anything about it and our financial situation was reaching crisis point, I think I'd be prepared to piss him off to get what we needed for our family.

Sorry to hear about that, I'm sure it's a horrible situation. Was the work done directly for the complany or was it for a client? My BIL is an electrician, and did a lot of work for a building complany, on a retail outlet. The building company didn't pay him so he went directly to the retail outlet owner, who agreed to pay him directly. It was probably more complicated than that, but he was able to recoup some costs. I hope you're getting legal advice though.

Write a "letter before action" to them, giving them a certain number of days to pay, otherwise you'll take action. Then follow it through.

If they're having cash flow problems themselves, they'll be paying those who shout the loudest. It's time for your OH to start "shouting".

Also, if it does get to court, you need a paper trail of reminders and debt chasing letters - you can't do it verbally or informally once they've passed the "friendly" stage.

A customer who doesn't pay isn't a customer!