To think when you're ill in the night....

[inmyshoos]

it would be normal for your dh/partner to come and check on you if they heard you up?

Just wondered. Mine never has. I have been vomiting rings round myself at times and although he will say he has heard me, he never comes to see if i am ok. Aibu to expect him to?

I don't know. The last thing I want when I'm chucking up is someone else there. Unless there is any reason for him to think you are in danger I don't see any need for him to get up.

Yes my DH does...a lot! It can be quite irritating to me though as he tends to molly coddle me a lot when I'm ill, because he enjoys being needed and giving lots of advice and expert wisdom on how to treat whatever I'm suffering from. It's sweet, but it can get a bit much.

When I'm ill I personally prefer to just be left alone. But the occasional "are you OK honey/do you need anything darling" would be a normal thing to expect from your other half when you're really ill

My DH would sleep through anything, so generally he never even realises when I'm ill in the night. Doesn't bother me particularly - last thing I really want with vomiting or diarrhoea is an audience. If I'm really ill and have needed to wake him though then he's always sympathetic.

My dh always checks on me. Sometimes I have to tell him to go away lol. But yes, it's nice to at least ask if there's anything you need.

Both myself and DH check on each other, usually just a back rub and ask if anything is needed. We usually go back to bed if we're sure the other person is OK and doesn't want any help though.

I would like to be checked on but would immediately ask to be left alone

Beep I was just thinking the exact same thing!

Yes I'd expect to be checked on.

Hope you're feeling better soon you poor thing.

I'd expect them to ask if I was okay and maybe offer to get a glass of water, but I wouldn't want someone to get up just to watch me puke in the toilet!

Mine will probably get up and check when I am pregnant, otherwise might mutter "are you ok" when I am back in bed and fall back asleep before I even answer.

To be fair, he will be up in a second if he hears the kid, even if I am up with them already.

If him staying in bed was bothering me, I would have just told him and I am sure he would check then the next time.

Mine probably wouldn't but I hate being fussed over when ill and he knows that. I want to suffer in peace.

I'd expect him to ask if/when I got back to bed (if he was awake - DH can sleep through pretty much anything) but I really wouldn't want someone bothering me whilst I was actually throwing up and I think DH knows that. I wouldn't check on him, either, unless he was gone a particularly long time/everything went silent and I was worried. Again, I'd check how he was when he got back to bed, too.

We don't get up for each other in the night.
We're both very supportive when morning rolls round and will help the other one out as much as possible

Depends how regular it is. Sounds from your op that it's not unusual (ongoing illness?). With what I've got at the mo, I'm up fairly frequently in the night and am fine with him leaving me to it. The first time it happened he was up and helping though I probably woke him myself. Now I'd rather he slept and helped at the other end (doing kids brek before work so I can have a few more mins sleep in the morn). As long as I know he cares, it's okay, but I wouldn't like to be awake sick thinking he didn't care. Is that how you're feeling? Is it based on anything other than him not waking? Does he ask how you are in the morning?

I would get up to check on DH, but he wouldn't get up to check on me as he knows I would hate it!

My OH is a really deep sleeper so I wouldn't expect him to come through and check on me. If he was awaken of course he would.

Plus, when I'm ill I like to be left alone.

No, not really. We both know we can ask for help if we need it but both prefer to be left alone if we are ill.
I certainly wouldn't expect DP to get up if I was up in the middle of the night.

Not at all. Why would he? If I'm so poorly that I'm worried I would wake him up. If just a bug or pregnant then no point in both missing on sleep. It's not like he could do anything to help I couldn't do myself.

We would get up and ask if ok, offer water, medications etc then go back to bed unless the ill one asked for help/company.

I too like to be sick in peace!

Dh would never wake up. But I'd wake him up if i needed support/looking after.

No I don't want want to be disturbed when I'm throwing up.

He'll ask if I'm ok and give my hand a squeeze back in bed tho probably.

Dp knows well enough to leave me alone if I'm being sick. I hate an audience!

He would ask if I'm okay when I got back if he was still awake but tbh if he kind of stirred and heard me but was half asleep I wouldn't be cross for him going back to sleep I probably would

My DH would and has done. Someone has to hold your hair out of the bog! I close nursed him through a dread disease and he has been there for me recently when I had surgery and couldn't move. He has found resources he didn't know he had!!

I don't think there is one "normal" for this.

I would prefer to be left alone.

DH would do and has done in the past, if he hears/feels me getting up in the night he'll always ask if I'm ok or if I need anything.