I appear to be living in pigeon street

[bigmouthstrikesagain]

I am in the semi sticks, train station, rubbish bus service, surrounded by farms.

I am a fan of bird song in general, and a fan of birds. But I have developed a loathing of the cooing of fat wood pigeons. 4 fucking 30am I was wide awake with a sound track of loud cooing seemingly everywhere, we have velux window over my side of bed so the three hundred/dozen/million pigeons massing on our street were super loud.

I am veggie but started craving pigeon pie in the early hours along with contemplating the ownership of a bazooka or such like to destroy all fat pigeons... I find their fondness for flying at speed into our Windows and occasionally actually killing themselves that way irritating. Also how flappy they are and how boughs bend under their massive bulk is annoying. When I first moved here I was struck by how healthy they looked in comparison to manky footed, sooty city pigeons, but I soon realised they are just as stupid and pestilential as the city fuckers just fat and pretty.

Sitting here in the garden I am enjoying the twittering and cheeping from tits, chaffinches, sparrows and the like. We are also very fortunate to see Red Kites regularly. Magnificent and graceful. But the ruddy pigeons... Uh. Did I mention that due to the position of our bed in relation to the ground window a couple of years ago I went up to my room and was greeted with the right of a pigeon perched on the window sill. Back to me and are hanging over, it looked at me unconcerned, casually pooed on my bed then flapped off!

So pigeons are bastards, yes?

I don't know about all pigeons being bastards but the one that crapped in my cup of tea recently definitely was. Perhaps they are sending us a message.....

I used to have that problem too. Not anymore ...

Least they werent shagging.

I was once woken up by a racket, opened an eye half way to peer through the skylight then nearly shot through the ceiling when my gaze was.met with two, fat arsed pigeons going at it like something off pornhub, but with weathers. Who knows, maybe there was a blackbird perched on my chimney stack with a stolen mobile surreptiously filming the ordeal to be uploaded to pornpidge at a later date ??

Anyways, least they weren't shagging.

Nothing to boast about Florrie. It would have a spud launched up its arse if I caught it stalking birds

Well we don't get woken at 4 and she stays in her garden so I don't have a problem with random internet threats thank you. Also a good ratter fyi.dont have them either.

So she only kills the birds in your garden? Great. Wasn't a threat either, I meant all cats in general.

Anyone else start singing "If you live in Pigeon Street, there are some people you should meet...." on reading the title?!
Say hello to Long Distance Clara and the twins with the letters on their jumpers (can't remember their names!)

See I'm not the only one who immediately went to YouTube to listen to the Pigeon Street introduction.

Hence YouTube ⬆️⬆️⬆️
😉

Molly & Polly

Yep. I live rurally, lots of trees, lots of big fat bastard shagging pigeons. They crap everywhere and are noisy twats. Only saving grace is if food gets scarce people will start eating them. Marvellous.

Thanks Google ..... I also found out there are only 13 episodes of pigeon street !! 13 !!! I was sure I watched it regularly when I was young.

Only 13 episodes! I used to watch it when I came home for lunch and it seemed like there was a different one every day. Pigeon Street, cheese on toast and Robinsons orange barley.

OP, we have crows scrabbling around on the velux and nesting in the chimney.

A licensed pest control service could sort out your problem.

www.pigeoncontrolresourcecentre.org/html/reviews/kill-pigeons-pigeon-traps-killing-pigeons.html

Of course YABU! Wood pigeons are one of my favourite noises in the world; reminds me of being at school camp in Scotland, up early before everyone else when it was cool and slightly misty and there were rabbits all over the place

Maybe the novelty would wear off if I heard them every day...

Bishop...blast from the past and tbh reason i clicked on this.... m.youtube.com/watch?v=3cwT2UR4x4Y

Only 13!!!!!!!!

I made friends with this parrot.

He now squawks loud enough to wake the dead if at 5am (his breakfast time) I've neglected to put sunflower seeds out. He squawks excitedly if I have put them out.

He's a blessing and a curse. DP just says curse. We've had to buy earplugs.

Molly & Polly

That's it! I could picture a jumper with a big 'P' on it

Not pigeons but this make me laugh 😂

Some tosser poster on here mentioned that the call of a wood pigeon sounds like someone whingeing 'my toe hurts Betty'.

It fucking does, too. So now the noise is twice as annoying.

Sorry.

BishopBrennansArse that's bloody hilarious!

Have a naice day out:-)

www.shootinguk.co.uk/news/pigeon-shooting-masterclass-will-garfit-91184

I got attacked by a pigeon in a kitchen once. It was in my student days sharing with people that were dirty tramps. Unknowingly to me, they had left the window wide open and some food on the counter. I open the door, the pigeon (probably have wanted to escape) sees an exit and flies straight towards me. I dropped everything I had in my hand and ran out screaming my head off.

I do wonder whether pigeons will eventually become that used to humans that they'll go the way of their seagull brethren and start snatching food out of our hands