Help me with a "Hell no!" reply, please.

[AllRoadsLeadBackToRadley]

Seriously- someone left the gate open at Cheeky Fuckerland this week!

It's my birthday in 9 days. (Actually, it's my bday on Monday- but I'm celebrating in 9 days). I don't usually do anything, but it seems like an absolute age since we all got together, so I've organized a curry night at home. A few mates and their kids, music, etc.

I've got a whatsapp group (lazy, couldn't be arsed to send the same text 170 times😂), which the girl in question is a part of. It's been a bit of a riot on there (people suggesting silly themes, etc, all good fun). She hasn't said a word on it.

She pinged me privately and said "my five are excited about next Saturday- they love Aunty Radley's cooking", etc, etc. And then the clanger (I think)

"What time is (my DH) picking them up? It'll have to be before 3 because I've arranged to go out".

Um...HUH?

I said she must have got her wires crossed- she was invited WITH the DC, and I've askrd everyone to arrive at about 5.30-6! (This is why I mentioned the Whatsapp group btw- these details have been mentioned several times on there, with people joking that they'd be arriving by private jet 😂).

Answer: "They'll be fine coming to yours early. I'll bang their sleeping bags in the boot and DH can drop them off about 3pm on Sunday".

I haven't replied.

I don't want to be responsible for five other kids without their parent there! We have no room for them to sleep over either! My DC share a room in a two bedroomed apartment. It'll be a squeeze getting everyone in on Saturday night, but that's always part of the fun.

In a nutshell:

Am I being selfish? I want to let my hair down as much as I can that night- anyone who's read my other active thread will know it's been a stressful month, and I need it!

If IANBU, please help me craft a reply.

If IABU and completely selfish, help me somehow work out a sleepover arrangement? How practical is it to squeeze 7 kids into one roome? (DB will be sleeping over in the lounge, and he snores like a lawnmower on acid, so impossible to share a room with, much as I love him)

?????

I guess she assumed/hopef you'd say you couldn't go to look after them but to drop them in to the party?!

"What were the symptoms your kid had CheekyFucker? Extreme aversion to batshit? I had that too, its excruciating"

Stupid twat. (Her, clearly..)

I bet that's exactly what she was banking on...

And a sudden peeking up of sick kid, so popped them along too...

Perking, not peeking

Yes I can quite imagine her at the door with
"Here are the eldest 4, thank you soooooooo much! And guess what? Little DD is feeling lots better so I've popped her pyjamas in the bag too. Have a great party but make sure to turn the music off and ask your guests to leave by 9pm because my kids need complete silence to sleep. Also, you need to sleep on the floor."

Wow she is a serious contender for most bat shit, entitled, persistent, ignorant person of the year.

Cannot believe she would text someone who is getting hammered at their own party to come and babysit her kids! (Even though we all know there was no sick kid at all, she is just crap at guilt tripping)

Hope your head clears soon Radley sounds like a fab time had by all.

Glad you had a great night!

Don't you fucking dare feel guilty. EVEN if it was true, and the overwhelming odds are it wasn't, NOT YOUR PROBLEM.

I think you should text her back one last time telling her to grow the hell up and that you're blocking her. Then do so. You don't need toxic people like that in your life.

OP, she's clearly weird.
I don't think you've got anything to feel guilty about.

whispering in view of OP's hangover Glad you had a brilliant party. In view of your last text to her do you think it's likely she will ever contact you again? if not, win win.

She's off her rocker. Even if the youngest was actually ill why would you expect the one friend who you know is in the middle of her own birthday party to come and babysit? She was obviously just trying to spoil your night so I'm glad it's backfired and you didn't even see the message until today. Shame that she's shown her true colours in such a batshit way but the friendship would be over for me - she clearly doesn't think that you have the right to enjoy yourself, it's utterly weird.

I wonder if she found a friend to have her DD, knew full well you wouldn't be able to go over but was hoping you would say the other 4 would have to go to yours so she could carry on her date. What a piece of work willing to use her kids to make you feel bad! I doubt very much that her DD happened to be struck down with something that badly on the night of your party. And if she really really couldn't get to OOH, I'm sure a doctor would come out in an emergency. Total bullshit.

Wow, she does not give up.

I've just realised that what KeiraKnightleyActs says above must be spot on - she knew you were having your party, obvs, and expected you to tell her to pop the other 4 over to you, and then, as a subsequent poster suggested, she would find her sick child was miraculously better and just dump them on you for the night. My gast is well and truly flabbered at this strange, strange, behaviour.

I can't believe she sent that text during your party - at this point I think she's trolling you!

Oh for goodness sake - if she was taking a sick child to get medical attention then surely her intended co-shagee was at a loose end and could have stayed with the others.

Glad you had a great birthday OP!

And just, wow. A for effort, Cheeky Fucker.

Well according to a mutual friend, the child went trampolining this morning!

I'm afraid I sent only a three word text in reply;

"Hungover. Fuck off."

Niiiiiice 😈

I hope she takes the hint now. Lying bitch

Some rapid improvement there! Wow. I wonder if she's got the balls to respond

And that really can be your last text to her. Best ignore from now on ...

I'm trying to think who would win in a Cheeky Fucker Will-you-have-my-kids stand off?
Hell no friend- 5 children overnight (including collection and drop off) in a 2 bed flat during birthday party
Or
WORKzilla - 2 children from 7 til 2pm for six weeks

It's would be great to see a text exchange between the two of them!

Oh God don't stop😀
We are all living vicariously through you (yes we are that immature and sad but we don't care)
I really need to know if this idiot still doesnt get how ridiculously stupid she is.

Mwah ha ha. Best reply ever.
Hope she takes the hint and you have an easy Sunday

Nah, she's done. I don't think you'll hear from her. She wanted childcare for plans she'd already made and that was why she kept on at you. Now she knows you're not an easy mark I don't think she'll try you again.