Help me with a "Hell no!" reply, please.

[AllRoadsLeadBackToRadley]

Seriously- someone left the gate open at Cheeky Fuckerland this week!

It's my birthday in 9 days. (Actually, it's my bday on Monday- but I'm celebrating in 9 days). I don't usually do anything, but it seems like an absolute age since we all got together, so I've organized a curry night at home. A few mates and their kids, music, etc.

I've got a whatsapp group (lazy, couldn't be arsed to send the same text 170 times😂), which the girl in question is a part of. It's been a bit of a riot on there (people suggesting silly themes, etc, all good fun). She hasn't said a word on it.

She pinged me privately and said "my five are excited about next Saturday- they love Aunty Radley's cooking", etc, etc. And then the clanger (I think)

"What time is (my DH) picking them up? It'll have to be before 3 because I've arranged to go out".

Um...HUH?

I said she must have got her wires crossed- she was invited WITH the DC, and I've askrd everyone to arrive at about 5.30-6! (This is why I mentioned the Whatsapp group btw- these details have been mentioned several times on there, with people joking that they'd be arriving by private jet 😂).

Answer: "They'll be fine coming to yours early. I'll bang their sleeping bags in the boot and DH can drop them off about 3pm on Sunday".

I haven't replied.

I don't want to be responsible for five other kids without their parent there! We have no room for them to sleep over either! My DC share a room in a two bedroomed apartment. It'll be a squeeze getting everyone in on Saturday night, but that's always part of the fun.

In a nutshell:

Am I being selfish? I want to let my hair down as much as I can that night- anyone who's read my other active thread will know it's been a stressful month, and I need it!

If IANBU, please help me craft a reply.

If IABU and completely selfish, help me somehow work out a sleepover arrangement? How practical is it to squeeze 7 kids into one roome? (DB will be sleeping over in the lounge, and he snores like a lawnmower on acid, so impossible to share a room with, much as I love him)

?????

I'm confused (not read every post!)

Is Partyzilla and Shagzilla one and the same or are they different cheeky fuckers?

Just as well the shagfest is off as from next year she could be looking for babysitters for 6 of 'em!!

I've rtft but I'm still confused. Possibly because I'm laid up with food poisoning. Can anyone give me the 'tldr' summary?

Tldr: radley has a birthday coming up shes having a curry night at hers, kids welcome. Partyzilla decides to use it as free babysitting for her 5 kids. Gets offended when rad says no. Tries to emotionally blackmail rad so rad disowns her. Im rads friend in real life. I believe partyzilla will rock up on the day with the kids. So i will be acting as a barrier.

The facepainting one and this one are different cheeky fuckers. Similar levels of brass neckedness though

Oh right, and Partyzilla was also responsible for refusing to pay you for your face painting after radley saved the day by getting you on board? Think I get it now.

Oh ok.

Thanks for clearing that up

You might want to read through the post titled Friends expecting me to look after kids, 6 week holidays. Surprisingly, you problem seems to be pretty similar to the one on this very popular thread.

Its confusing trying to give them nicknames and keep track of them

If her DC are so upset that they are wetting the bed, why cant she cancel her date and bring them to the party?

This

Given that Partyzilla has five children and it very 'poor unfortunate me' about it, and appears to think that it's good luck on the OP's part that she only two children, are we sure that she understands the cause and effect between shagging and having children? She would be better off going to the party instead of going out shagging so that she can avoid a surprise 6th child next spring.

I'd be so tempted to reply to her text about her DS wetting the bed:

Well it's good news for me that he won't be sleeping in my bed, then!

Shamelessly parking. Oh my a serious classic. Need an update on Saturday!

If you ever come across Face Paint Zilla again in your line of work as face painter, please paint a massive cock on her face!

I think it's pretty damned pathetic and mean to use something as personal to a child as bedwetting to guilt someone.

I pity those children.

Face paint zilla did a lot worse then that if i ever see her again its automatically a deathmatch. I don't hate many people, in fact 3 people. She is one of them.

I would SO have offered to paint the face of FacePaintZilla for free after that. I would have been very creative.

"Oh thank goodness you told me that your youngest still wets the bed sometimes, I was debating if I had been too harsh not letting them stay, but there's no way I want a child that's not dry through the night to sleep in my bed! Hope you get that sorted, can't imagine anyone will want them for a sleep over knowing that..."

PARTYzilla and SHAGzilla are the same person with 5 children including one who only wets the bed when the OP cancels un-arranged sleepovers.
They are not the same as FACEPaintzilla. I have no idea about FACEPAINTzilla's children or their bed wetting habits.

I would SO have offered to paint the face of FacePaintZilla for free after that. I would have been very creative.

With Sharpies?

I am betting the kid did not really wet the bed, party/shagzilla was thinking of ways to guilt the op. or maybe the smallest one regularly wets the bed and it is not connected to missing the party.

I mean why would you tell all your children that they were having a sleepover before checking it was ok with the host?

She's seen your invite then thought , great I can go out and she'll watch the kids

Breakfast - to guilt trip the host into having them..

what's PLL? confused with all these abbreviations!