Nosey neighbours and our pup's separation anxiety.

[GerbitaFillsbottomMcSimmons]

We have a 7 month old pup who is spoiled rotten and really a beautiful member of our family though we recently learned she suffers from separation anxiety. We went out for dinner one night nearby leaving her at home. We were planning on being gone for no longer than two hours and after 45 minutes we got a call from a friendly neighbour that she was howling. DH raced home to find our neighbours on the opposite side of the street who we've never met calling out "control your dog mate". We found this quite rude. Since then we've been told these neighbours have threatened to call the RSPCA on us "to teach us a lesson". We have never left our pup for longer than three hours (from the age of four months) and only about ten times since we've had her (she goes to day care or I work from home) she is NEVER left alone longer than that. So I have been working on training her to feel comfortable when I leave and today I decided to place my phone on the table and video her when I left to see how she was coping. I popped to the shops and came home 20 minutes later and watched the video. Poor girl was howling after 5 minutes but shockingly I saw in the video that the neighbours had come out of their house and were videoing her howling! - obviously trying to build a case! I am furious that they would go to such lengths without even coming over to talk to us. If they did they would see how extremely loved and cared for she is. So what should I do? I am thinking of knocking on the door with DH, pup and a bottle of something one night to apologise for any noise and let them know we're working on it (through gritted teeth). AIBU to be furious they are videoing inside our house without ever coming and talking to is about it? What would you do? Sorry this is so long!

45 minutes of howling til your neighbour rang you. Previously left for 3 hours. I think video neighbours are going to report to RSPCA.

Can you arrange for pupper to go to doggo daycare?

Oh soz I see this is evenings as daycare already in place.

If they feel the need to video your dog they are clearly massively pissed off about it. However I find it hard to believe that they've got to that state without discussing it with you already so I think they're probably just overreacting. People like to be affronted about things, it's far more dramatic than just sorting it out. So on the whole I think you can probably ignore them. Complaining to the rspca before addressing the problem with you is just silly.

You haven't worked on your dog's separation anxiety enough. You need to go back to basics and start leaving her for a few minutes. Build it up very gradually. Has she got a crate? I had the same problem with my dog when I had to leave him to take the kids to school. I was gone ten minutes and like you I left my phone filming him in the kitchen. He went mad, barking and biting at stuff. So the next morning I shut him in his crate. Filmed him again. He curled up and went to sleep. He obviously felt much more safe and secure.

See a trainer and deal with the separation anxiety. Many dogs have to learn to be left alone. Then contact the RSPCA, explain the situation and the steps you are taking. They have more serious things to worry about, cases of actual abuse. And they dont deal with noise complaints.

How are they videoing inside your house when you're not there? Have you done like controlled crying for toddlers? Leave her saying bye! Then back in five mins, just wait outside or upstairs if she can't get up. Then gradually stretch it to a longer and longer time? She might get the idea that you'll def come back!

Spoiled rotten is the clue. .

Dog trainer more preferable to rspca visit.

The new advice for separation anxiety is not to leave them to cry at all. I will try and find a link.

Zigzagintotheblue thanks for the advice. I have been trying with leaving the room and getting her desensitised to the front door closing. We leave our bay window open so that pup can see onto the street. So happens that the neighbours can see in to!

Stopnamechanging thank you, that would be helpful. It's not really possible to not leave her on occasion, she has to learn. I think it's going to take some time though.

You can't leave a dog with separation anxiety. At all.
You need to identify the point at which the dog becomes anxious. That could be picking your keys up or putting your shoes on. You stop before that happens. So touch keys or pick up and put down shoes. Gradually build it up. You can't just leave them.

Dog trading advice and support on FB,

She has to learn. She will. She will learn to panic when left.
The advice above works. Big pup couldn't be left at all. At 9 month she's now ok. But it took weeks of not leaving her. At all. Ever.

*training

Does the dog bark at lot in general? I don't mean just at the postman like most dogs but at anything and anyone? Is it allowed to bark for an extended period of time?

Reason I'm asking is that it seems a bit extreme from your nieghbours after only 45 mins of howling. Especially if is the first time or maybe the 2nd if it howled for 3 hours previously or 3rd if the other 10 times the dog has been left alone ....

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Soz, took ages

45 min of howling is quite a long time (in my opinion)

Trainer and spend the time training the dog. Not sure on the law re filming inside someone's house, but I think the neighbours are on very dodgy ground there. I can understand, however, that they are probably totally pissed off at the noise. I would go and speak to them and say you are getting a trainer but (very calmly) request that they do not film inside your house ever a-fucking-gain!

Thanks stopnamechanging and wolfiefan, that's really helpful. I didn't know that they shouldn't even be left for more for a moment. We have a sitter near by that we can call out so that shouldn't be a problem. Agreed 45 minutes is a long time however pup is inside so the noise is really not that loud with the windows closed. It's really these people making threats without ever bothering to speak with us that's annoying.

Don't worry about the RSPCA, our neighbours reported us because the dog took to howling. RSPCA man visited, checked dog was well looked after and left.

I've found with my idiot dog distraction works, he has a treat ball and if I shut him in the kitchen and give him that as I leave he's too busy to howl about me leaving and by the time he's figured it out and got his treat he's forgotten I'm out and goes to bed, throwing dog biscuits in the air works nearly as well as he is too busy looking for them.

I've checked with my neighbours by the way, he doesn't notice I'm gone if he doesn't notice me leave

Do you have neighbours attached to your house or are you detached? Have they said anything about the noise?

I wouldn't be worried about the neighbours per se, 45 min is a long time for a pup to be distressed. I just fear that this will cause more problems long term if not sorted early on.

Listening to a dog howling is torture. My neighbours dog howls from the minute they leave until they are back. It drives me to distraction.

Thanks Greebol. That's actually what we've been doing too and reserving raw bones or the treat ball for when she has left and it appeared to work at first but now it seems she just has a nibble for 10 minutes then says 'hey, where is everyone' and starts off.

Ontheboardwalk we are in an attached terrace with neighbours either side but there's been no complaints from them, just neighbours across road who we've never met!

I understand why you are annoyed about them videoing your house but a dog howling is bloody annoying.

I once lived next to a do that constantly barked and it made my life hell.

I hope you get it sorted.