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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Neighbours have 'made' a driveway which MY parking space blocks

407 replies

SomewhatNewToThis · 30/06/2017 22:52

Trying to keep it short. I live down a very weird road- very few houses have driveways. Some of us have allocated bays in the street. Other people- generally the owners of newer houses- must park in a car park about a minutes walk away created especially for our road. It's literally at the end.

Neighbours have a weird upside down U shaped house, facing the road. They have decided to put a very ugly, gravel driveway on the reminder of their front garden.

However, MY allocated council parking space that belongs to my house is where the exit to their 'driveway' is. Their DD just passed her driving test- hence driveway- and I've had to move my car from my space SIX times since Tuesday.

Neighbours have now sent letter asking me to park elsewhere so their DD can use 'driveway.'

AIBU to have posted a polite letter back basically saying no and that I will not be moving car multiple times a day in future? Hmm

Car park for our houses requires a permit. As I have the allocated space, I cannot apply for a permit as I already have a space. Neighbours have one space in car park provided for those without allocated spaces, however can apply for space for their DD as car park has spare permits available. I can't park anywhere else as you can only park in allocated bays.

AIBU to think my allocated space is mine, it's not my fault it's in front of their house and that I shall not be moving my car from now on?

Diagram provided. Grin

Neighbours have 'made' a driveway which MY parking space blocks
OP posts:
JustArandomUser · 03/07/2017 08:36

Instead of accepting the invite for the meeting with coffee, perhaps suggest they have a meeting with your solicitor instead?

cafetea · 03/07/2017 08:37

don't go round for coffee! you have an allocated space and they are causing you problems. It sounds like bullying tactics. Just say that you are not available for coffee and that you are using your allocated space. If they have a problem with you using your allocated space then they can contact the police on the issue. i would say to contact your local police officer to let them know of the situation. Do not enter into any discussion or get any pressure form them.

Ginslinger · 03/07/2017 08:42

I agree with Dragonfree - in that you're going to be neighbours and have to live together - have the coffee but just repeat forever that it is your allocated space.

scootinFun · 03/07/2017 08:44

Have the coffee and clearly explain that it's your space. Last thing you need is a dispute when you try and sell.

Lweji · 03/07/2017 08:45

Instead of accepting the invite for the meeting with coffee, perhaps suggest they have a meeting with your solicitor instead?

It's nothing to do with the OP.

They should be having tea with the Council.

BreakfastAtSquiffanys · 03/07/2017 08:53

If you meet them (and I wouldn't) EVERY time they use the word drive or Driveway, say "you mean your garden". Don't validate use of the term Drive, cos it's not one. It's a garden with a pavement in the way

LazyDailyMailJournos · 03/07/2017 08:59

I wouldn't want to go round for coffee, but in the interests of neighbourly harmony - because you have to live next to these people - it is probably worth going. I would definitely take a friend with you though.

Keep it short and to the point:

  • I specifically purchased my property because it had a parking space outside.
  • I will not be moving my car in the future, nor will I be parking elsewhere.
  • If you want to formalise your driveway arrangements then you need to contact the council.

If they make any noises about the inconvenience or how you aren't being helpful, then turn it round on them. "I've paid for that particular parking space when I purchased my house. If you want me to park elsewhere so that you can turn it into driveway access, I presume you will be making me a formal offer to purchase the space subject to council approval?"

I bet it hasn't even crossed their minds that they want you to give up for free an amenity that you have paid for. If they splutter about paying you, then you can nicely point out that you had to pay for the space as it as included in the cost of your property, so surely they cannot expect you to just 'give' them your parking space for nothing!

Bluntness100 · 03/07/2017 09:01

I have to be honest, I wouldn't go for coffee either, they just want to bully you. I'd write back and say coffee sounds lovely but you're busy at the moment, as for car parking suggest to contact council if they are unhappy with their current allocation and leave it there.

TestTubeTeen · 03/07/2017 09:02

It is really important that you get in first with the council.

You don't want to find that they have applied for a dropped kerb and the council decide to allocate you a different space.

Meet with them fine, stick to your script: it's not just a spot on the road, it is a specifically allocated space that goes with your house, you chose your house because of it and that is that. You are completely unwilling to enter into any variation of that agreement between neighbours because it could invalidate your rights to the space. ( it could!).

ArtOfKnit · 03/07/2017 09:12

If you meet them, don't go alone - they will gang up on you and it's easier to stand firm with some back up. Every time they say drive, correct them - it's their garden not their driveway. I wouldn't have coffee, just a 5 minute conversation as there is nothing further to say than "this is my paid for space, which is convenient for me, and I shall not be moving my car for your daughter. Ever". The coffee won't even be made by the time you say all that that, and you don't want to be stuck in their house having an argument with them.

smeerf · 03/07/2017 09:14

Dying for this update Grin

DestinationSofa · 03/07/2017 09:18

Parking

wowfudge · 03/07/2017 09:21

Keep a diary of what's going on OP - the date they gravelled the garden and the occasions they ask you to move your perfectly legally parked car.

CatsCatsCats11 · 03/07/2017 09:23

Good luck with your meeting today OP they sound crazy.

mermaidsandunicorns · 03/07/2017 09:25

Maybe they're mn'ers and are all too aware of the wrath of mumsnet and parking

allwornout0 · 03/07/2017 09:26

Please don't go for coffee, they will just try and guilt trip you.

HappyFlappy · 03/07/2017 09:32

I like the colour of "their house" and it goes well with "their 'drive'" but I think the red of your parking space clashes horribly. I also think, if you're going to use the yellow, you need a darker colour for the writing: white tends to blend in and is difficult to see

Everyone's a critic! Grin

shouldwestayorshouldwego · 03/07/2017 09:32

I would ring council before the meeting so that you know where you stand and the next steps and they can't try to persuade you to give in to them. Just keep saying 'the council said..'

HappyFlappy · 03/07/2017 09:39

I'd be tempted to buy a banger for £50, park it in that space and never move it. I know it means finding a space for your actual car but it'll be worth it!

Are you the other half of my soul, Cherry?

TheCutOfYourJib · 03/07/2017 09:44

They may only have instant, not worth the risk.

Liska · 03/07/2017 09:45

I came on to say what breakfast said: do not call it a driveway, keep referring to it as a garden. I would go for the coffee, be calm and pleasant, but have a script to explain that 1. You have paid for that parking space as it is part of your house price and will not be giving it up or swapping, even if they were to offer you the appropriate compensation 2. If they want to turn their front garden into a driveway, they need to get permission from the council first 3. By driving over the current kerb/pavement they are breaking the law 4. You have been a kind neighbour by occasionally moving your car, and by not repirting them to the council for an illegal driveway, but you can't keep that up. I honestly think they don't realise they are doing anything wrong, or being unreasonable. They've invited you to coffee because they think they have a perfectly fair request, and can appeal to your better side. You should be able to set them straight firmly and nicely. Good luck!

HappyFlappy · 03/07/2017 09:49

Jib

Grin
confuugled1 · 03/07/2017 09:52

Another one who thinks you should drop them a note back to say that it's not convenient to have a coffee at that time to discuss their front garden and use the time to talk to the council instead so that you can get information from them and make sure that they don't manage to get permission to drop the kerb because they put in for it and forget to mention about it alreadybeing your spot - and the council not picking up on it.

Morphene · 03/07/2017 09:53

I think for the sake of a diagram we can live with the eye bleeding yellow...

HidingUnderARock · 03/07/2017 09:54

They will be recording the conversation. Make sure you do too.

They will have prepared a script to lead you into saying something they can use to get what they want. It may well start by them being nice and then dropping it on you when you are in "nice mode" and might just automatically agree.

I would absolutely avoid this meeting, and instead write back as others have suggested stating that your allocated parking space was important in your decision to buy your house, and they should apply for a permit for their daughter like everyone else. Be polite and don't go into any detail.

Whether or not you meet them, never say "drive", always "your garden". Remember anything you say could be taken out of context, so DO NOT offer to move to another space if the council supplies one. That is a slippery slope and you shouldn't even discuss it.

Take a friend or a lawyer.
Write up the important points of the meeting as soon as its over. Think like Comey. Expect them to set you up and lie about it.

Or better still don't go.