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AIBU?

DP cheated.

65 replies

user1498563254 · 27/06/2017 12:54

Sorry for long post..
so as not to dripfeed- I was abused very badly as a child which resulted in me being sent to a grouphome.. DP knows this and has been aware since we met
We have another friend- "Anne" (not real name)
DP and me have been apart (in different counties) for a while, and i came over to surprise him.. found him in bed with anne.. right in the middle of sex. not sure what to do. DP keeps apologising and telling me how guilty he feels.
WIBU to stay with him?? he says he is sorry and i feel so bad

OP posts:

Report

PollytheDolly · 27/06/2017 16:20

Bin the shithouse.

You are 20 and can get out of this. Please do. Plenty of help and advice here from those that know. Please take it.
There's someone out there for you who is perfect for you. He isn't. She isn't. Take out the trash and live your life. You only get one xx

KungFuPandaWorksOut16 · 27/06/2017 16:25

Like Judge Judy says
" everybody always gets caught on their first time of doing something wrong. what are the chances of That? "

He's taking your kindness for weakness.

RB68 · 27/06/2017 16:32

Be grateful he showed you his real self. He is a cheat - she is a cheat, you do sound like your self confidence is low, and after what you have been through not suprised. You need to learn about yourself and learn to trust yourself and get yourself set up in life. It does sound like you need a confidence coach type counsellor - not sure what if anything you have had but worth a conversation with your GP in a broad way.

Bumshkawahwah · 27/06/2017 17:00

This is a person who, instead of doing his utmost to make you always feel safe, who knows your background and insecurities, put himself and what he wanted to do first. This is not a kind person...this is a person who did not give enough of a shit about you. And it is someone who I will guarantee is lying through his teeth right now.

You are only 20. Please don't be the woman who stays with this man, has kids with him and feels trapped at 30 or 40 years old with a serial cheater. He has shown you who he is...someone who doesn't care nearly enough about you.

Giddyaunt18 · 27/06/2017 17:35

I am so sorry. I am glad you don't have children together, it will be easier to walk away and find someone who truly loves and respects you.

user1498563254 · 27/06/2017 20:03

thanks all x
"D"P is now ex boyfriend and i hope we will be happier for it
have spent the day with two friends and they are both helping me get back on my feet

OP posts:

Want2beme · 27/06/2017 20:18

Good luck to you. It's not an easy thing to do, but after time it'll get easier for you and you'll be happy.

BastardGoDarkly · 27/06/2017 20:27

Oh, bloody good call User < applauds users wise friends >

PeaFaceMcgee · 27/06/2017 20:30

Best wishes, it gets easier - pleased you have good friends x

notlikecherrycola · 27/06/2017 20:30

speaking from experience dont take him back i did after I found out my so was cheating and now 2 kids and 5 year later im in the same situation again. I wish i had never took him back leopards dont change there spots . hope your ok

hellomoon · 27/06/2017 20:30

Well done OP.

You know you are worth more than the pair of them put together. I mean... who treats the people they love with such utter disregard?

You don't need bullshit like that in your life.

Bumshkawahwah · 27/06/2017 21:13

Good for you! Please believe in yourself, that you are worth more than this. I don't want to sound patronizing but I think you have made a great step towards valuing yourself and not limiting yourself to a life linked to someone you can't completely trust.

Esspee · 27/06/2017 21:52

Well done OP. Please stick with your decision. You deserve much better.

innagazing · 27/06/2017 23:27

Well done for being strong and finishing it. No one deserves to be cheated on like this, and luckily you are in a good position without children and a mortgage etc. so it is easier to walk away. It probably doesn't feel like that at the moment, but please trust all the posters on here who have been through these sorts of things.
Believe in yourself and don't ever settle for second best- in a boyfriend or your friends. You deserve more and you owe it to yourself to find someone who will love and respect you. Cheating on you with a friend of yours is doubly awful for you, and this won't have been the first time, or his last time if you hadn't caught him at it.
I'm glad you're with friends who are supporting you. Good and loyal friends are hard to come by, so value them. Stay strong and I hope you find happiness in your life.

Giddyaunt18 · 28/06/2017 14:00

Oh well done, he is so not worth it.

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