To have a small drink whilst pregnant?

[PayingMyWayYouSay]

I'm just about 20 weeks now. Baby fine. Lovely little boy.

DH and I going to the pub that sells food this evening. Would I be unreasonable to have 1, just 1, WKD with my food?

DH is extremely against it and starts protesting in full when I even mention drinking alcohol

I tried to take a sip of his Fruity Cider today and there was a lot of "Why would you do that?"

He thinks it's harmful and isn't worth a marginal risk.

I know it's my body but it is his baby too so I think he's entitled to express his feelings.

Surely 1. Something unit is okay with food?

It won't be a regular thing, it's just something I fancy.

I wouldnt in the first 12 weeks, in my view an odd small drink no more than about once a week is fine as long as you can stop at one and you have no other issues. I longed for a glass of wine with ds2 then when i had it i was totally disappointed it just didnt taste right - just be prepared to be disappointed!

I find it absolutely bizarre that you think public health guidelines are carefully produced to reflect scientific evidence and not human behaviour and social economics

Me too. The amount of people who think it really is balanced sensible advice purely for their health....would be nice but it's really not!

Ah, cross post with Jassy!

I don't believe for a second that is the usual behaviour of someone who has struggled to get pregnant.

And that sort of irrationality is a very good example of why behavioural factors are such an important consideration in public health advice.

I have had a miscarriage (2nd trimester) and had fertility treatment. And still had the odd beer/glass of wine when I carried my last pregnancy to term.

😘, Perpetual.

Sitting down watching Glastonbury tonight with a small glass of prosecco while pregnant. When I was last pregnant (less than 2 years ago) the guidance was no more than a few small drinks per week and it has recently changed. This isn't in light of any overwhelming scientific evidence that small amounts of alcohol cause problems, but due to the fact it can be misinterpreted and used as an excuse for people to drink more than this amount.
There is not likely to be any conclusive randomised control trial style eveidence on this, or many many things related to pregnancy, as it is unethical to conduct these kind of experiments on pregnant women.

I have worked in alcohol services and have seen the amount that is needed to be drunk to cause feral alcohol syndrome. It is an awful thing but not a concern for people drinking tiny amounts.

If you are worried then err on the side of caution. If you can relax and not worry then enjoy a small drink every so often. As previous posters have said, your DH should be prepared to give up alcohol to support you if he is so evangelical about it.

namechange buzz and everyone else who is giving the impression of being a bit too dense to understand science...

Do you know what there is some evidence of being a potential cause of miscarriage..?
Sex in very early pregnancy

There is another thread asking about sex during pregnancy.
Why haven't you piled into the that ask why they are so selfish as to not put their own needs to one side for the sake of their baby?
Why aren't you questioning their ability to be a good parent when they can't even go without a shag for 9 months?

Well said sparechange

Because in that case sparechange, it involves a man getting sex. That is much more important than a mere baby vessel choosing to enjoy a drink.

oh for God's sake. It's about reducing risk as much as you can WHERE POSSIBLE. Obviously it's not possible for most people to avoid cars and air. But alcohol totally unavoidable.

It would be possible to avoid some car journeys though. They aren't all unavoidable. The same goes for many other things women do when are pregnant. Not many are essential.

When I was pregnant with my first daughter six years ago, the NHS advice was to encourage consumption of 1-2 units a week.
They based this advice on a study showing that children born to a mother who had a glass of wine, for example, with dinner had better behavioural outcomes by the time they were five.

This is the standard of NHS guidelines.

Were they saying the wine was good for the baby? Yes that was exactly how it was presented if you simply read and believed what you were told.

Clearly these results were actually based around social and economic demographics and the outcomes on a child's behaviour by the time they were five.

However it was genuinely encouraged by the same sort of primary colour leaflets that sparechange refers to - remember this is not long ago.

By the time I had my second daughter the new guidelines of zero alcohol is the only safe choice were in place. Only a couple of years apart.

This is the point about engaging your own intelligent and enquiring mind, making your own balanced judgements and questioning cover all guidelines that presumes the reader is almost a child themselves.

A women's say over her body should be absolute and final.
Anybody who doesn't understand that is extremely sinister, in my opinion.

Thyme lord - wow

A women's say over her body should be absolute and final.
Anybody who doesn't understand that is extremely sinister, in my opinion.

This is exactly how I feel.

Bold fail. Dammit.

I think it was fairly obvious that I was being very sarcastic user.

Handmaid's Tale, anyone?

Indeed. Hence my horror at the amazement of a few posters that I wouldn't acquiesce to a hypothetical order from my husband not to drink because I was carrying his child.

Only I get a say in what happens with my body.

Ha - hard to tell on here sometimes!

Fair point user

As I said upthread, I had a miscarriage after having drunk before knowing I was pregnant. Then I had two more after not drinking a drop. That means I let go of some of the guilt of the first one. If I were still in that place I'd be finding your comments incredibly upsetting, namechange. As it is, I just find them judgemental and completely lacking in empathy. The vast majority of miscarriages have nothing to do with anything doing anything 'wrong' and it's both misleading and heartless to suggest that women who have a drink in pregnancy have themselves to blame if it happens to them.

If you don't really drink when you're not pregnant why on earth is it so important to today? I absolutely wouldn't and didn't but it's your baby

I feel a bit stupid now for starting this thread.

Sorry if some of the harsher replies have upset anyone

A bloody drink every now and then wouldn't be the cause for a miscarriage/stillbirth. How awful.

I didn't know I was pregnant with DD until 9 weeks (failed pregnancy test). In that time I drank (occasionally heavily), smoked cigarettes and spliffs, I took MDMA, ketamine and cocaine. Obviously I wouldn't have engaged in these activities if I'd known she was there and stopped when i did, but actually she's fine. 10yo now, no physical or mental problems, above average intelligence, good at swimming and gymnastics, musically talented.

Yes, this is anecdotal evidence but also shows you can't necessarily deduce poor lifestyle choices will always impact badly on the fetus.

A couple of drinks does NOT cause miscarriage, can we lay that one to rest?

Humans are very bad at things like segregation of chromosomes and a huge number of conceptions don't carry on past a few weeks. The vast majority of the time it is down to genetic errors etc and absolutely nothing at all to do with maternal behaviour. I would hate to think anyone felt guilty for having a few drinks if they subsequently miscarried. Very very few miscarriages are down to something the mother has ingested. Most are just one of those things.

The detrimental effects of alcohol are from its role as a teratogen, not an abortifacient