To be a tiny bit annoyed people always assume DD is a boy?

[gandalfspants]

Unless she's dressed predominantly in pink?

Ok, I admit I'm not the 'girliest' woman ever and I'm not massively into pink, though she does have some pink clothes.

If she's wearing a blue dinosaur romper then fair enough, but today she was wearing a red and white striped ladybird vest (tiny writing actually says 'little lady' if you get close enough), and a denim look dress. Admittedly you'd have to get close to see it was a dress in the buggy, but do red, white, and denim really shout 'I have a penis'?

I'm really not that bothered (she's only nine months so doesn't care either), and mostly don't even bother correcting people unless they say 'what's his name?' and I just say 'she's xxxx'. At which point some people give me a dirty look like I've deceived them!

But AIBU to wish a tiny bit that people wouldn't assume that any baby not covered in pink must be a boy?

I probably am.

Apparently my "uncle" (the dickhead my aunt married when I was 20) saw a baby on the bus who was dressed completely in pink and lace and frills. He then asked "what's his name?"

Even my aunt was embarrassed about that one. He's as thick as pig shit and has the arrogance to match.

Chocchoc there was one cafe where all the staff thought she was a boy and we ended up going fairly regularly an I never bothered to correct them.

I'm partial to a gender neutral pronoun (they/them/their usually doesn't offend), also good when meeting animals, some people don't like it when you misgender their dog either. Though all dogs are he and cats are she according to my dad.

YANBU, or if you are, I am too! My DD is 8 months and we have exactly the same thing. It really grates on me, why should they presume just because she isn't wearing pink?! It worries me that so much of society has such a narrow view of what girls can be like. My poor girl has to grow up in this world

Get her one of those stupid pink head band things with a bow on.

But really YABU, so what if people think she's a boy.

I once had a conversation with a elderly man in a supermarket. He was admiring my baby 'girl' saying how pretty 'she' was. I pointed out 'she's' a boy. He had another look and said 'Oh yes, she could be, couldn't she'. I wasn't bothered, I don't think my baby was either.

I don't know why people assume? If they're head to toe in blue or pink then fair enough but if they're not you've got a 50:50 chance of getting it wrong. Mind you I had my Dd in a cute pink cardie today and a woman still asked how old he was!

Though all dogs are he and cats are she according to my dad.

I agree with your dad.

If people are forced to use a pronoun for a child they'll draw on whatever cues they have. I am baffled as to why someone would assume a 9 month old wearing a dress would be a boy, the odds are stacked against it, but I doubt they mean anything by it.

I get this all the time. Even when she's wearing a dress if it happens to be grey or something.

The worst is when you politely correct people and they question it!

I had one woman arguing with me that my daughter definitely looks like a boy, before finally settling on the fact that she has 'boys hair' - she was 9 months old..

It happens to dd all the time. It's annoying when people make an issue about it. If someone says 'how old's your little boy?' I'll say 'she's 18 months' in a friendly manner. It doesn't bother me so I really don't think I give that impression, but many times I've had 'well if you will dress her like a boy, what do you expect?'

I do dress her in unisex clothes sometimes, but they're unisex in the sense of leggings/trousers and a jumper, not a t shirt saying 'boys will be boys'. This has also happened to me when she was wearing things like red dungarees, a blue dress, and flowery leggings. People just seem to see male as default.

My boy babies were frequently mistaken for girls, even when wearing very "boyish" clothes. It's very difficult to tell boy babies and girl babies apart unless they're naked or dressed head to toe in blue/pink.

Although with my current boy baby, I'm noticing less guessing and a lot more comments along the line of "I can't tell if your baby is a boy or a girl" when he's dressed in neutral colours.

My eldest boy was often mistaken for a girl, admittedly he had a slightly girly look about him whereas his brother looked very boyish. My daughter gets misaken for a boy all the time, she's almost 2 and still has hardly any hair. I don't worry too much about it tbh.

My DD is a complete slaphead.

Factor in dressing her frequently in primary colours she's frequently mistaken for a boy.

But even when she's been in head to foot florals; and we have a bright pink stroller?!

It's the hair thing. I swear it.

Dd1 was taken as a boy when wearing a pink dress. Apparently he looked just like his granddad. I smirked.

I was heavily into pink for my girls. I had a bright pink pram and they had loads of lovely pale pink outfits. I constantly got asked (usually by older men) if she was a boy. Best exchange ever:

Oldish man: What a lovely little fella! What's his name.
His wife: (sharp tone) It's a girl, Richard.
Oldish man: (defensively) Well - how am I supposed to know that?
His wife: Because she's wearing a pink dress and is sitting in a pink pram....

I felt quite sorry for him and muttered something about it being difficult to tell...,,

Because our pushchair was black with a bright blue trim dd was often mistaken for a boy regardless of whatever pink outfit she was wearing.
'Why's she in a boy's pram then?'
I was asked that more than once...
I had thought it was fairly neutral

Thing is I didn't mind the assumption; babies are all kind of similar and I wasn't offended, but some people seemed to act like I'd deliberately misled them and actually did seem to be a bit miffed.

People used to think DD was a boy even when dressed in pink/florals, I thinks it's because she was pretty baldy until about 11 months old.

I always get asked "what's her name" or "how old is she"
My boy is one but always has been mistaken for a girl since he was born, I don't think he looks girly at all! And he always wears boy colours, he's never worn pink purple etc But I always laugh it off, in fact people almost always comment that hes such a pretty boy that's why they thought he was a girl, however saying that I'd be slightly offended op if it was the other way round, so yanbu!

In my experience it was always older people doing this. I did wonder if some slack needed to be cut over eyesight or hearing. You might say: "It's a boy". They hear: "She's a joy" and continue to wax lyrical about your girl. I really wouldn't be offended. I liked that someone bothered to talk to me about them. As for the pink/blue thing yes it's odd if someone doesn't use it as a cue but I honestly don't think there was so much pink for girls when i was a child. I also remember my dad saying his colour vision was very different after his cataract operations, everything went much bluer afterwards and was yellower before so maybe that takes the edge off their colour vision. Or maybe they're just not with it, who knows!

If it annoys you, clip a girly looking toy (like the Lamaze doll) onto the pram. Doesn't matter what she wears then

I get this all the time too but I'm sure I have been terrible at guessing other babies' gender in the past.
Now I've got it sussed though, you can tell by the socks.

I have boy girl twins. People would look in the pram, see DS (always had a strongly "male face") and DD and say "two boys how lovely".

DD has a fine bone structure and has never looked in the least boyish but she was completely bald so even on days where she was dressed in pink/lace/frills people seemed to glance at the lack of hair and think "boy".

They'd ask me their names (not in the least gender neutral) and then say "are they identical".

I used to struggle to answer without making it obvious that I thought the person was an idiot.

I came to the conclusion that people are so overcome by the gorgeous, squishiness of new babies that their brain cells temporarily stop functioning.

We've had it loads too because I tend to dress DD in hand-me-downs from male cousins or fairly gender neutral stuff (although I've got a soft spot for monsters and dinosaurs).

Today I thought she was dressed quite girly: yellow floral leggings, white t-shirt with a zebra on it and blue Mary Jane type shoes. We were stopped on the way home from toddler group in the street by someone who wanted to tell me what a lovely boy I had.

It doesn't bother me particularly but I do wonder what she has to wear (other than head to toe pink) for her to be coded as a girl.

Oh, she's 16 months so doesn't care either way :)

My youngest DS is 2 and is constantly referred to as a girl. He doesn't wear a lot of blue but wears other bright colours, it's mainly the fact that he has quite long blonde curls. Doesn't bother me though.

I had the opposite! Out with ds as a tiny newborn dressed in a red and white striped romper with Snoopy on it, I was asked "What's her name?" I explained that ds was a boy and told the questioner his name, to which she replied "But he's dressed in red!" Never quite worked that one out either; some people seem to have odd ideas about colours on babies.